Taaaaaaaaz & Lauuurrrrra *squishes you both*

*waves at Taz* I'm not really needing a care pack right now but I'll take one to ferret away for later if you don't mind. How are ya?
*glomps Helen* Hi!

*Hugs Laura * How is your Mum? That must be a worry you don't need.......

*Hugs Crimson* It's hard to get motivated isn't it?! I struggle too

* Spots Helen and HUGS*

TAZ!!*Hugs*I missed you :)

*jokingly tries to push Helen away* :) How have you been?

Obviously I need to work on my speed at responding :P

*waves at Crimson* They don't have expiry dates, they're good forever!!

*hugs Mark* I missed you too :) How has life been?

Taz :) Life has been , well its just been , I've been existing with my low mood and numbness , I'm going to ask my social worker if he thinks my anti-depressants might be wearing off , like I've built up a tolerance to them .

HOW ARE YOU?

Definitely is

Yay! *makes like a squirrel*

I spy a Julie! and I spy a Helen! and I spy a Mark!
*starts a pillow fight*

I have a feeling I'm going to miss a lot of posts but I'm tired and have an early morning for me.
Plus I DON'T want to cut and am worried the triggeryness will come back like earlier today.
*Night Time Hugs Wardies* *Leaves Tea of all types on the table and honey for the sweet toothed*

Hmm, sounds like a possibility... but I've never heard of someone developing immunity (in a way) to their anti-depressants. Although I suppose if you were taking them long enough it could happen. Hell, I don't know :/ You've got me questioning that too now! :)

Have a good night's rest Mark, sleep well :)

I'm... alright. I won't get into anything right now because I hate doing the disappearing from the thread act, and coming back in complaining right away. But I'm safe. And that's a good thing right now. Tired, but going to drag my butt to hockey anyway. :)

*grabs 5 pillows and waves them around wildly*

*Bashes Crimson with a super soft Pillow* Lol

*glomps you 3*

Taz, not great, you??

*tackle hugs helen (but gently, dont wanna injure you lol)* Sorry to hear that you are not doing great right now. Hope you are at least safe.

*glomps taz* welcome back again! we've missed you. feel free to talk about whatever you want, complaining or not, we don't mind. Good that you are safe right now though.

*hugs mark* goodnight! hope you sleep well and avoid SI.

*hugs crimson* hope you got some work done. sorry that your lunch involved more work. That doesn't sound like much fun. good luck on that exam you have to take.

For those that asked, my mom is okay-ish. Thanks. She was having cluster headaches after an car accident, but she hasn't had one in 3 days now so hopefully they will calm down. I was worried, but its a little strange b/c when you see her when not having a headache she seems perfectly normal, not injured/ill at all... so its hard to have all the ups and downs. But things should hopefully be more okay now since its been a few days.

I see I apparently missed a pillow fight *grabs a pillow incase it starts up again*

*throws feather pillows at everyone in the ward before running out to work on the essays*
Mark~ Have a good nap or night (whichever it may be).... hmmm maybe I should just start saying have a good sleep lol
Laura~ Glad she's doing better and hope it stays that way.
Taz~ We don't mind you 'complaining' but glad you're safe. :)

Laura, I'm safe at the moment :) *hits you with a pillow* Glad your mum's doing a little bit better, hope she continues to not have them :)

Well, Jarrod's signed up for the army, seeing as he's too old for the air force (it's ridiculous really - he is just 7 months too old!!)... he knows that he'll be headed off to basic training sometime after October... so that gives me some time to get used to the idea of him being gone. And Crimson, we've thought of the idea of me going to res while he's at basic (and advanced)... but I'm not sure I want to. Yet at the same time, I don't know what I'd do instead?? :-S

Sorry no individual replies but Taz, good to see you back!! How are you?? besides safe that is (which is lovely). We've missed you!! and it doesn't matter if you're complaining or not. :)

I'm in a bad place mentally right now, even though we just got back from a few-miles-long bike ride (we being Jarrod & I). I'm really worried about him going into the army & how I'll function with him being gone for up to a year at a time... I really don't know. And this is kinda... I don't know, putting MY career on hold? because we'll be moving around so much. I won't be able to go to grad school... I don't know. Is that selfish of me?? :-X because he's intending to make a career out of this and stay in until retirement, if all goes well. And I pray that it does... And then he wants to go to school... and maybe then I can go to grad school. But I really don't know. :( We haven't really talked about that.

Guhhh. Sorry for whinging once again... :-X

Aww honey... Did you at least get to ask all of your questions?
I do think if you are going to do residential treatment that going while he's gone is the best way to go. You would be away from him anyway and going separately would add more time than going while he's gone. Have you looked into graduate schools you can do long distance? I'm not sure if you could but you may want to try talking to someone at base's education center. They typically help soldiers get schooling done through schools that work with them on long distance learning and they may be able to help a dependent the same way. You may also want to check into their 'social work services'. If I remember right you were going to school for psych (feel free to correct me if I'm thinking of the wrong person)... Social work services is a civilian employed place for therapy and such... (not the best wording but c'est la vie)
Does he know what job he wants to make a career of yet?

Arghhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!! Curls up in corner. Screw it all there is no point!!!! People are pushing me to breaking point.

*offers cuddles* do you wanna talk about it?

One essay done, one layed out and one done-ish.
I still have to have someone look them over and to type up the one but all in all I don't feel like I'm drowning just like I'm not ready to hand in even the done ones. I think they're crap but I've been working on them for forever and the deadlines are fast approaching so I'm giving it a whirl.
And I even managed to eat a little bit as I worked.

*huggles/waves at everybody*

I just tried to spell everybody with like 10 b's. Hmmm way to much keyboard action.

There's been about 4 pages since I was last in here, so I'm sorry I'm not able to keep up with the individual replies. I have read everything. I just don't want to leave anyone out.

I have to email my psychiatrist today or tomorrow to tell him how the trial of the meds has gone . . . and I think the answer so far is !good. (Or no good for the non-programmers.) My anxiety definitely hasn't lessened and I think my depression has increased, which really isn't helping. I'm not sure what the next step from there is. But he'll email me before the day is out and let me know. *sigh*