Hey all. Argh i am such an idiot, i forgot my keys and had to climb a ladder and get in through the bathroom window. Gave my neighbours a laugh.

lmao..silly duffer :P lol

Don't worry about waking me up. I have to start to wake up anyhow.

Mors Certa, it isn't about deserving. Not here. You are trying to help yourself by being here. We'll help you and you'll help us.

*pulls Mors Certa out of his corner and hands him a bowl of her RootBeer Float ice cream* it's pretty much amaising.

And susans right...

Jess, Mors Certa, sorry to hear that you're really having a tough time, please try and stay safe *extra special snuggles*
*snuggles everyone else*
I hope we're all doing ok in here today guys. I've only just felt like chatting today as been trying to distract myself with cleaning my flat, though it probably didn't need doing. Been crying on and off all morning and didn't think I'd have the strength to snuggle and offer support. I now feel weak with hunger but I don't want to eat as worried that I'll be sick cos I'm soo worried at the moment. I've not had any communication from Eoghan for 10days now, we've not gone that long since the beginning of his tour 4months ago. I'm so scared that he's stuck out in some terrible contact, I mean I know this is his job and that no news is good news, but still, really terrible thoughts have been invading my mind and I feel terrible for not thinking positive, but I just haven't the strength today to be strong. I'm not strong without Eoghan, I'm just pathetic..........
sorry for rambling.....
*goes out to smoking shelter for a few fags to try and calm down*

*hugs everyone*

don't know about a jail cell? I'm sure you don't deserve that. I have been a few times in the padded cell in here, not so bad, it might be vacant if you feel you really need it. If you shout really loud we can still hear you if you need us.

oh yes, padded cell corners were rather comfy when I was in there. Great for rocking in. Don't forget to holler if you need us. I wish I could offer you more support than pointing you in the direction of the padded cell, but I really don't have much to give today.
Do you reckon you can actually run out of tears?

HELP!!!
I know how to stop myself from crying but it really isn't the best idea and will only cause more tears in the long run.....I've really had enough today, I just want to know that Eoghan's ok, but now I'm scared of him phoning as I can't break down on him, he can't know that I'm struggling, he can't worry about me, he has too much to deal with out there.....
I want to go to sleep and wake up when he's back safely in 13weeks.....if i'm sleeping then I can't cut......

*sits next to Hayley and holds her*
don't wish away 13 weeks something amazing could happen in that time.

or something really terrible....nothing amazing happens without eoghan....if I start to enjoy something, I then feel guilty that I'm having fun without him and then I miss him even more, and now I'm F'in crying again..............RAAAAAAAA!!!!!

Don't feel guilty about being happy, I am sure it would please him that you can have fun when he isnt there as well.

I know what i mean and sorry if doesnt sound like it does in my head :(

Wanders through and offers more hugs and generalised comfort.
I have the worst headache imaginable but I refuse to take thier painkillers. They wont trick me like that again. I wish life was better for us all. The sun is shining why does that make it worse?

Gets bags of assorted hugs with sparkles, added comfort, added sleep, added numbness, and anything that anyone needs from a hug.

can I have one of each of the assorted hugs please? Sorry if thats being greedy, when I'm feeling better I'll return the favour.
*goes out to smoking shelter to pass time whislt waiting on hugs and to stop from doing something I'll regret later*

*hugs everyone who wants/needs/will take*

Scared about some stuff at the moment. Too many people nearby to explain right now, but will explain later. Hugs would be appreciated though, if anyone's got any to spare?

*passes over a whole bag of assorted hugs made up special to Hayleys requirements* whatever you need it'll be in there, and its not being greedy, the world will never run out of hugs. ever.

*also passes over a bag of assorted hugs to Auburn shadow* there you go, hugs all around for anyone who wants them.

*picks one out then puts it back*

Ahhhh am tired but my minds in overdrive. I have got a random excitment about my trip to america (even if its forever away).
Also am trying to make the negative thoughts about my friend go away.

*leaves a hug by 1ofmany incase they decide they do want one afterall*

thank you.
Wish I could offer you all some hugs right now, but atm I'm clock watching, if I'm gonna hear from eoghan tonight it'll be in the next 23minutes, he never contacts me after half 7, its too late over there. so I need to hang on a bit longer, I can't F*** up and then have him phone striaght after, I'd never be able to forgive myself, i don't think I could lie to him.