Sorry you ache Mark.

Welcome Robyn.

Day just started and I'm done already. My schedule has been all messed up for 2 days now. With so much going on I need appointments and things to go as planned. And my son had so much anxiety yesterday he was making himself sick. With hubby's schedule at work I feel like a single parent when it comes to all the health stuff. It's so exhausting. :(

*Hugs Kathryn*

Hiya Guys , How are you all today?

Not doing too well. How are you Mark?

*places refreshments on the table*

So done with today. Can I just give up now? *raises white flag*

I'm not doing great either , Kathryn *Hugs*

*hugs* Mark. I'm sorry you're not doing well either. I'm here if you need to talk.

*Hugs Kathryn* Nothing that I haven't already Said , The Woman I Utterly Love with all my Heart is on the wrong Continent , or I am , Or Both :( Too many feelings.

How are you all?

Hi all.
Am down. Exams looming, res school looming, very poor result in a subject, been ill, all of which on top of everything else is tripping me off the deep end and whispers are louder. Didn't sleep at all the other night. Burying myself in books to avoid my reality. Whispers are encouraging me to hurt myself.
Don't know what to do.
*hugs for anyone who wants One*

Hey Annie, Am sorry you are down *Offers Safe Hugs* Are you still ill? What is res school?

Sorry you are feeling down Annie.

I hope you can be on the same continent with your love Mark. I can only imagine how hard that is.

I'm feeling on edge. Hubby asked how I was doing. I told him stressed and worn out. Pretty much got no response. Typical. :/ I feel like I'm drowning and instead of treading to breathe every once and awhile it just feels easier to drown instead.

This is too hard, feels like everyday is just a battle to stay alive.
I hurt myself tonight and I don't know why, it didn't help. It never does.

Still a bit flu-ey. Just finished my antibiotics.
Residential school is a week of practical learning for External students. It's a full week, study wise, and I'll be away from home the whole time. Which is good and bad.
Just feeling not ready, especially with all the crap going on right now.

Oh Ashley , I'm sorry you are struggling so much *Offers Safe Hugs*

Will you be far away from home , Annie?

Yup, interstate. Which in Australia, is generally hours away.
* hugs for Ashley and Mark and Kathryn* - these were supposed to be handed out in the previous post. I'm having trouble with viewing and responding to whole things right now.
Kathryn, I've had similar responses from the man. It left me feeling empty, angry and worthless. Have no advice on how to deal with it. But I feel for you.

Ashley, we keep fighting, in the hope that things will improve.

How are you all this Bank Holiday / Memorial Day / Whatever Day it is where you are ?

Exhausted, yourself?

Had my first CPN appointment this morning, it was hard going.
First day back at work tomorrow, I'm terrified.
Hope everyone else is well.

Exhausted Also . . . . But that's Par for the course these days.

Sent you a short PM Ashley .

How are we all atm? *Puts out Cake*

Alive and unharmed. Convinced myself to put off urges again. Headache. Exhausted, but that also seems par for the course.
Good luck with work Ashley.
* starts the kettle for tea and coffee*

Well Done putting off the Urges , Annie *Hugs* I know how hard that is :(

I am Anxious and so so sad .

Very Little has changed , the insecurity is immense.

Does anyone know how to make a CV or Resume?

How are we all today?

Really struggling right now.

*disappears into pillow fort to cry*

Sorry I have to hide all this, keeping strong for the world but I just can't...

*Hugs Kahlia Tight*

I'm a nurse, I'm supposed to look after people. How can I do that if I can't even look after myself?
I'm weak and hurt myself and now it's looking infected. I thought going back to work and having something to do would help but it makes no difference. I come home and still feel the same.
I was invited out with a friend today and said I would go then today just ignore her all day because I couldn't face it.
How is everyone else doing?

PS. Mark you can get pretty good CV templates online. My dad altered mine (he's a business manager and reckons this makes him an expert :ermm:) if you like you can use it as a template.

I'm sorry you are so Low , Ashley :( As a nurse I know you know this but do your best to keep your wound sterile and dressed. *Hugs*
I have PM'd you. Hope you are doing okay today :)

Thanks for the hugs big brother, you have no idea how much I need them right now. *hugs*

Sorry you aren't feeling so good Ashley but I hope that things are improving. Looking after our selves is sometimes the most difficult thing to do sadly. *safe hugs if okay*

I'm still struggling from hearing that I have cauda equina syndrome which could result in permanent paralysis of the legs with no appointment with a neurosurgeon until August. Being in the wheelchair is hard enough because I really just want to get up and walk but knowing this.... Sorry. I'm just going to go and cry in a corner.

*Extra Hugs Kahlia* Love ya Lil' Sis <3

There's a 4.30 am now . . . .

*hugs Kahlia* at least they've shown it's not related to your mental health. Which should help if you go to hospital again. Sorry to hear that it might turn out so bad tho. And that the neurology appointment is so far away.
Ashley, I get where your coming from. *hugs*
Mark, thanks for being around.*hugs for you too*
It all hit the fan. I hurt myself. I ended up feeling worse.
It's all coming apart now.

Hey Annie *Hugs* I'm sorry the proverbial hit the fan , I'm around if you wanna chat :)

Right , I need a friend , even sleep had abandoned me.

How are you all doing?

I feel like I'm about to burst out crying.

How are we all today?

If anyone has them I could use some comforting words.

Hey Mark. What's going on? Haven't had much time lately to get online.
I hope you are ok. *special hugs just for Mark*

*Hugs Annie*

1. Long Distance Reletionship that is beyond complicated, So In Love though , Not really got a handle on my feelings.
2. Only IRL Friend moving away has really triggered my BPD Fear of Abandoment.
3.Meds change has messed up my Sleep.
4. Anxiety is going turbo charged.
5. Triggered beyond belief and am at my folks for 9 more days , they think I've recovered and Mum made up the bed in crisp White Sheets.

I'm just doing my best to keep a lid on my head until I get home , very very very hard indeed.

How are you ?

Homesick, overwhelmed, nervous and exhausted. Intensive residential school is a bit much right now.

*Hugs Annie*

I'm surviving, but it gets so noisy and the days are so long. How are things with you?

Head really isn't on properly at the present..... Having to defer my exam hasn't helped, but at least it's been approved.

*hugs big brother*
*hugs Annie*
*hugs to everyone else who wants/needs them*

Sorry, my head isn't really working well at present

Too nervous to cope right now. Skill exam tomorrow. Feel utterly unprepared. Not enough time to prepare. Gonna try comfort food then sleep. I might hurt myself otherwise.

Sorry I have been MIA for a bit. Life is just so overwhelming right now. Just not sure what to do anymore.

*safe hugs to everyone*

*Safe Hugs to You all*

*safe hugs to everyone*

It seems like we're all having a hard time right now, and I'm very sorry that the case. Tomorrow was supposed to be my exam but my deferral was approved so at least I don't have that quite so much on the brain but I'm struggling to make sense out of the world. Having our new neighbours really doesn't help.... Nowhere else have a heard a sentence made up with nothing more than swear words that still makes sense.

Really need to be in a safe place right now.

*Glomps Kahlia*

*glomps back at you big brother*

*waves at everyone*
Survived, but hurt myself. It's been a ridiculously intense week. Sorry I haven't made contact Kahlia. I've been doing 9-5 daily and I've been too wrecked from anxiety and what to me are early starts to do anything but sleep and read. Maybe when I come up for placement.
Kathryn, I think we all tend to disappear when it's really bad. Glad to know you're surviving tho.
Mark, you're wonderful. Sorry I've tended to just lurk lately. Thanks for keeping the board active. :-D