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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

xxjuliexx 14-05-2010 03:47 AM

*looks around* where oh where did that voice come from *feels with arms out streatched till i find invisable laura* can i come under ur cloak?

MammaMia 14-05-2010 03:47 AM

*curls up with Amy & Laura*

You're not a loser darling. What's happened?

SoMuchMore 14-05-2010 03:52 AM

*hugs amy* sure there if you want to.. its a quite large invisibility cloak

*hugs helen* Thanks.. but i am a loser.. Nobody wants or really cares if I am around or not. And why should they? I am in no way useful, interesting, fun, or anything else...

Im just stupid... just ignore me, ill be fine. i always am..

MammaMia 14-05-2010 04:04 AM

You are soooooo useful. You have been giving me SOOOOOOOO much support to me recently. It's helped me more than you could ever know :'( People want & do care that you're round. We do. Plus you are interesting & fun & many other things. I'm not going to ignore you, we care. I care.

As my best friend always tells me "fine is a crock of **** & you know it"

xxjuliexx 14-05-2010 04:05 AM

*hugs laura*

SoMuchMore 14-05-2010 04:16 AM

Thanks you two.. i really appreciate your responses.

I just dont feel like I am very useful or anything else. I feel like nothing... and more and more i think people dont really want me around. I dont want my existence to just be tolerated. *sigh*

*hugs helen and amy*

xxjuliexx 14-05-2010 04:24 AM

i want u around

MammaMia 14-05-2010 04:32 AM

I want you round too. I'm sorry you're feeling the way you do. Think we all go through phases like that.

Can't decide if I really am unsafe or not. Yes I am suicidal a bit. I know that sounds stupid. But one minute the urges are so incredibly bad as is my head. The next...I feel like I'll be okay. But this is when I should be worried I suppose, don't want to end up thinking I'm out of the woods & then do something. Does that make sense? My head's all ****ed and muddled. We'll see. Am seriously hoping that when I call my doctors back today, they've either got an appointment or I can get one for today. Really could do with speaking t someone other than my best friends/friends. Don't get me wrong, everyone's been amazing. They're really struggling. Particularly my best friends. We're all in the same place pretty much. All trying to get through and support each other. That's just what we do (even if it makes us worse?) and yeah. I know they're very very very worried about me (and each other?). I'm very very worried about them both. Am beginning to ramble & lose my point. Hmm.

SoMuchMore 14-05-2010 04:41 AM

I hope that u can get in to see your doctor. And yea, i think u should be still taking urself seriously, even if sometimes u feel alright, especially if u are bouncing in and out of suicidality..
I can understand trying to support and help ur friends even if it makes you worse. I am like that too. If someone needs support i will completely disregard myself for that moment... its prolly not always a good way to be but.. idk how to change that.

Anyway, i hope that u and ur friends are gonna be okay hun.

MammaMia 14-05-2010 05:05 AM

Well she's not my doctor, but yeah. I hope so too Laura. Yeah, you're right, I should take myself seriously about this. I'm going to. I have to. For my own sake & everyone else's.

I do that so much, not really that healthy is it...

I hope so too.

xxjuliexx 14-05-2010 05:06 AM

feel icky

mouse in darkness 14-05-2010 05:15 AM

*offers Hugs to all those who would like one and waves to those that don't*

Meh, life sucks! I suck!

*crawls under bed and makes self as invisible as possible*

Hope everyone is having a good day. And offers supportive *hugs* to those who aren't

MammaMia 14-05-2010 05:21 AM

Why you feel icky Amy?

Nicole(?), you don't suck :) Life however does. *offers cuddles*

xxjuliexx 14-05-2010 05:25 AM

*curls up under concert block*

mouse in darkness 14-05-2010 05:26 AM

Yup that me, thank you for the cuddles. *Cuddles* you back.

You ok Amy? offers *hugs*

Sorr about the slow update my computer isn't loading all the responses so have to fiddle with the programming agian. Joy.

You can do it Julie!

MammaMia 14-05-2010 05:29 AM

You okay there Julie?

Nicole, you're welcome & thank you for the cuddles back :) Don't worry about being slow to reply. Silly technology hey?

xxjuliexx 14-05-2010 05:31 AM

*pushes out a note* mhmm i fine

mouse in darkness 14-05-2010 05:32 AM

You can say that again. I am having to go back to the main forum just to get updates. *sighs in frustration*


Can I give you a hug Julie?

taz35 14-05-2010 05:36 AM

I'll post a more detailed response once I have computer access - at my uncles and trying to read and catch up on an iPod touch is infuriating me. But I can't sleep again (big surprise). I hate lying in bed with so many thoughts running through my head. :(

xxjuliexx 14-05-2010 05:38 AM

*sends magic hugs to taz35*

xxjuliexx 14-05-2010 05:40 AM

just heading out be back later

MammaMia 14-05-2010 05:46 AM

That sucks Nicole. Hope you can sort it soon.

Hope you have fun wherever you're going Julie.

Taz, I can relate to how you feel so much. It sucks :( Want to talk about any of those thoughts that are running through your head??

5.46am. I really should get some sleep. Ick. No point trying now, getting too bright in my room. But I am getting bit tired. Hmm. We'll see whether I last or not. Will be awake at 8am regardless. Have to phone back. Please let them have an appointment for today :( I can't hold on all weekend or whatever. Yes I'm impatient at the best of times :'(

xxjuliexx 14-05-2010 08:31 AM

anyone here

Doikers 14-05-2010 10:39 AM

* Hugs to all who can and want to accept them*

Hmm I just rang the Mental Health resource centre and my Diaz perscrition isn't there like I was told it would be . I can't call my houseing supproy worker because I'm waiting on the mhrc to get back to me and I don't have a messageing service and my mobiles broken.

It's raining , or t least it was 2 minutes ago , I need some exercise, but can't leave the house until I get phone call :S

I'm physically tired but I need to walk that off.
Emotionally I'm knackerd.

*Sits at Ward table*

CrazyHayley 14-05-2010 10:42 AM

*toddles into the common room after 3days of wandering around ward avoiding people*

Hey wardies, so sorry I've been avoiding here.... no excuse, just me struggling with everything and avoiding everyone. BUT...(possible TMI!)...I came on my period this morning!! Which means that the PMDD is subsiding and it also means the last one over and done with as its injection time on monday! If I wasn't ill with a stinking cough and cold I think I may actually be happy....?!!!

*germ free group huggles all round to those who want them*

I am so sorry but there is too much for my medicated-more-than-usual brain to cope with to catch up with you all on the past three days. But you have been on my mind and I'll try and be a better fellow wardie from now on.

I spy a mark! *huggle* Morning! How's you this morning?!

EDIT: ah Mark, you posted whilst I was typing, so you answered my question. Lets hope you get phonecall back soon and they sort it all out quickly for you and that during that time the rain stops, so that when you're able to, you can then go for a walk. *sends out positive thoughts*

Doikers 14-05-2010 11:02 AM

Hey Hayley *Hugs* Well I got my phone call the Perscription is being written by the very boss of boss's of Pyschiatrists in my mental health team , So I'm gonna brave the rain and go there now to pick it up . He's not my Dr he's above my Dr , Then when I get back phone call number two , to my housing support worker to continue that saga with E-on *Sigh*

*Pops out*

Scarletdreamer 14-05-2010 11:02 AM

Good morning everyone...

Hayley, dunno if you read what Crimson posted but she said that those who play WoW on EU servers can possibly make characters on US servers, but not the other way 'round... so do you want to see if we could all four of us, Mark, Crimson, you, & me, get together on a US server? I have toons on Silvermoon, Grizzly Hills, and Area 52, and room for new toons on all of them. :) Also, I have high enough levels to run littler toons through dungeons on Grizzly Hills and Silvermoon. :D An 80 on Silvermoon and a 74 on GH. So those would be my two servers of choice, but of course, we could always start on a new server also. :) Just not RP/RPPVP/PVP because I suck at all of those things. ;) (Well, if that's okay with you all, that is... I don't want to be bossing around this whole operation!! :o sorry....) Anyway, am so glad that you're going to be getting that shot soon!! Maybe - hopefully - sanity will return. ;) And you'll be able to post more, yey... :) *cuddles*

*cuddles Hels* Did you get any sleep, love?

*cuddles Mark* So sorry that your diaz isn't in the pharmacy yet... but maybe it's just a bit late? Ewwww rain... I could give you a workout regimen you could do indoors with weights, that my personal trainer/close friend gave me, if you'd like that? :) I used to do it and really need to get back into the habit as it really burns off fat quickly but healthily. :) Anyway... *more cuddles*

*cuddles Kahlia, JK, Nicole, Nicole, Lindsay, Laura (who IS NOT a loser!!), Julie & co., Kat & co., Oliver, and anyone else I've forgotten (sorry!!)* ♥

I'm really tired, although I just got up. Well not really, got up at 5:30am and it's just past 6am now. But am still sleepy-eyed. I think I'll probably be getting on WoW in a bit... just started a baby druid yesterday named Freyasoul and I really want to get her to level 10 today... she's level 7 now so it should be doable. :) Wheeee... lol.

I'm still a little anxious but not as near as bad as last night... am still struggling with SI thoughts though, but also not quite as bad. :-/

I have an eye doctor's appt this afternoon... ugh... don't want to go. :(

*hides in a corner* :(

CrazyHayley 14-05-2010 11:02 AM

Ooh I spy and April *huggle!* I think I'm going to play on WoW for a bit, as long as I don't end up sneezing loads right when I need to be hitting keys to kill things - this happened yesterday and I died! doh! April can I pick your WoW brain please? What does ICC stand for, I've seen it come up in the chat box a few times and I've noooo idea! lol Oh I dinged level 30 last night! Really feel like I should be better than I am though....oh well. Have you had your hair cut yet?

CrazyHayley 14-05-2010 11:10 AM

ooh wasn't 11.02am a popular time to post, LOL!

April - I haven't the foggiest how I would work out getting onto a US server. I really am NOT technical minded, but perhaps a few PM's between us WoW addicts and we could try and sort something out and I think I'm on a PvE realm, seemed the best to start out on and I've no experience on anything else, so am happy to go with the flow. Good luck at your eye appointment later. I got my new contact lenses through yesterday so I'm enjoying clear vision again with my updated prescription!

Mark - when you read this I hope that you've dried off from the rain and good luck with the phonecall to your support worker, I hope that they've made progress with the saga! I'll prob be on WoW when you get back, so if you need distraction and help then feel free to whisper me when you log on and I can help.

Well my other fellow wardies who are hiding or sleeping or what not, I shall catch up with you later *more germ free huggles for those who want them*

*toddles off into corner with big box of tissues to become Roseleigh the gnome!*

frenchhorn 14-05-2010 11:46 AM

*hugs all wardmates who want hugs, waves at anyone else*

I'm in a good mood because I just went to the barbers for the first time and have at last got my haircut how I want it and its a proper mens haircut. I'm really hoping all of my quintet will remember to wear all black and someone bring a camera so we can do photos, everytime I say, someone always forgets, its a little annoying.
I may upload some photos of my new hair later, if your lucky!!
anyway I best be off for rehearsal number 1 of the day.

Kahlia1981 14-05-2010 11:50 AM

*offers hugs and waves as appropriate*

Having a really bad day today. Or maybe that should be night. Had to chase all around town to get a prescription filled. Seriously. Went to two different pharmacies and neither of them had it, but thankfully the second one rang around to find a pharmacy that did have it. Turned out the third pharmacy only had one box! So, they put it aside for me and we scooted right across town and got it. And it's not like it's even a rare drug or anything!

My mum had surgery today too. Apparently she's home and doing okay but is very sore, which you kind of expect after surgery. I only got the message like half an hour ago. I kind of would have liked that bit of information earlier, but they might not have been in a position to have given it any earlier.

Otherwise: mood is crap, I'm extremely suicidal, I'd love to SI but I want to make my 21 months which is only 11-ish days away and I am just so over everything that it isn't funny.

Sorry for not being able to respond to everyone. I'm just not up to being supportive right now. I am really so sorry. :crying: I really hope you can forgive me.

xxjuliexx 14-05-2010 12:18 PM

*crawls back under the concrete*

Doikers 14-05-2010 12:26 PM

Well , I've got my next months worth of Diaz , so am releived about that although I don't know what I'm going to do next month , go through all this again ? Hmmmmm

Oliver , I hope you can post a picture of your new haircut I bet you look cool :)

Kahlia , you don't need our forgiveness you've done nothing wrong *Hugs*

*Holds Aprils hand as she goes to her eye Dr *Hugs*

Hayley . Well done on getting to level 30! Thats huge , I pinged Level 8 by killing wolves and murlocs near the lake in the woods , Names of places escape me . I might need help on a quest I got killed on but I'll try for level 9 today :)
I bet you can't wait for your injection , I hope it works out and helps fix your PMDD .

Now for my phone call to my Houseing support worker .

Scarletdreamer 14-05-2010 12:36 PM

I spy a Mark!! :D

I am soo close to level 9 on my druid... she's only 2 "bubbles" away. But I took a break from leveling her so I could come online for a bit. :)

Hayley, I think that the options for a US server would be under "change realm" and then at the bottom of the list there should be options for US or Oceanic or Asian... I think. I know that I can get on Latin American and Oceanic servers that way. Oh, and ICC stands for Icecrown Citadel - raid and 3 dungeons/instances for REALLY well-geared level 80s. I've completed two of the dungeons and then died repeatedly on the last one, the last boss - the Lich King himself!! Quite scary, a DPS (damage per second) race. And we just didn't have the group for it. :( I ended up with a 40g repair bill... lol.

Mark and Kahlia, glad you got the meds you need. Kahlia, am sorry that you had to run around so long for them!! and Mark, sorry that you didn't get your diaz sooner... but at least you have it. :) And Kahlia, don't worry at all about not being able to reply/support people at the moment, you've done a stellar job in the past of helping us all out and I think we all understand how bad things can get... so please don't feel bad about that, if you can help it. (I hope I'm making sense... :-S)

*holds Mark's hand* I hate going to the eye doctor's... am never sure what they're going to do there, whether they'll dialate my eyes or use the pressure thingy on them, or or or... :( It's been nearly 2 years since I've gone though and for someone who usually wears contacts and has been getting worse vision for years, that's not good. :(

*cuddles everyone then hides in a box*

Oh *pokes head out from box* Oliver, I'd love to see pics!! :) And Hayley, I'll post another pic soon, there are some pics (quite) a few pages back of my new haircut, but I can post one Jarrod took yesterday on our walk/hike/thingy. :)

*hides again*

Doikers 14-05-2010 12:36 PM

*Lifts Concrete and Hugs Julie* You ok ?

My housing support worker can't meet me until next Wednesday when I'm due to meet him anyway.... E-on have given me 7 days to pay , next wednesday is 6 days * Anxious * Good job I have Diaz .
My Diaz was sorted today so I'll look upon it as one good thing done rather than stuff not done * tries to be positive *

Scarletdreamer 14-05-2010 01:26 PM

We posted at the same time, Mark. :P

Had a sort-of breakfast... don't really want to eat any more than I did. :(

Feel crappy. Tired. And I'm worried about my internship, whether it's been finalized and whether I've done all that I need to do (I don't think I have). ARGH!!!

:crying: Pathetic, simply pathetic............ :'(

MammaMia 14-05-2010 01:35 PM

I spy a Nicole & April!!

*cuddles everyone tight*

Well I actually managed to fall asleep after 6am after all that. Woke up around half 8 because my Mum came storming into my room with a phone call. Told her to go away and get them to call me back later. She wouldn't & gave me the phone, so I cut it off. Meh.

Rang doctors (from what they said, it was them anyway) and told me I am anaemic & have to get the flipping iron deficiency pills myself. OR if I can't, to get an appointment to get a prescription. Really don't understand. So just going to be lazy **** & get an appointment and make her explain :'( I can't afford anything right now. I need to magic a huge amount of money for next Thursday as it is. **** the fact I will probably continue to be dizzy & collapse until I get on those pills, I don't even care. I am so rock bottom that I just want to get off. Yet I'm trying to keep myself here & alive. I made my best friends promise me and I have try too.

I'm SOOOOOOOOOO over everything :'( I suck at being an adult :'( :'( :'(

*curls in a very hidden place and cries*

mouse in darkness 14-05-2010 01:39 PM

Got dragged out by housemates and visited another hostel the bummer about it is that they don't take people my age even though they are virtually empty. Really bummed out though.

Been feeding this cute ginger and white moggy that has had its tail docked. Poor kitten (more like fat cat) we spoil him and he gives us lots of affection. It is nice to be loved even if it is a stray cat.

*hugs to everyone who wants needs them* Hope you all had a good day. Glad Doikers and Kahlia got your meds.

Mamamia- We posted at the same time LOL. Am sorry you are unwell. I hope you can get the iron tablets. You do not suck .You don't suck at being an adult, you are an amazing supportive unique individual, unfortunatly some things hit the fan and others don't.

MammaMia 14-05-2010 01:52 PM

Thanks Nicole, what you said means a lot. Wish I could believe it about myself hehe :(

I spy a JK & April :D *jumps on*

Doikers 14-05-2010 01:56 PM

Helen , I'm sorry you have to take Iron Tablets and that you got so little sleep and that you are haveing such a **** time of it lately *Hugs*

April , You are NOT pathetic , I don't beleive it for a second *Hugs*

*Hugs Mouse-in-darkness*

I'm eating FAR TO MUCH , It's the stress , if I don't wanna cut I have to eat , I'm not good at healthy coping mechanism's hmmmm......

mouse in darkness 14-05-2010 02:12 PM

Mamamia- I wouldn't say it if it were not true. *Hugs you gently*

*Hugs Doikers*

Gotta get offline. Bugger. Next worker starts soon and will crack if I am on the computer am already half an hour over the alloted times. oops

*Hugs to everyone who wants/needs them and waves to those who don't*

MammaMia 14-05-2010 02:16 PM

*hugs Mark & Nicole*

Louise 14-05-2010 02:16 PM

*leaves hugs*

MammaMia 14-05-2010 02:23 PM

\*hugs Louise*

Doikers 14-05-2010 04:23 PM

*Gos around collecting his hugs*
*Leaves extra hugs out*

Doikers 14-05-2010 04:40 PM

I spots Louise and Crimson , How are you guys hanging on?

PoisonedApple 14-05-2010 04:57 PM

I read all 4 pages since last night but not much of it stuck with me... sorry guys.

april- i have a few toons on a few realms but the only realm i can recall off the top of my mind is runetotem... i'll let you know if i have any on a server ur on later on today.
and does that indoor workout of yours involve having much room to move? i'm trying to find something i can do in a small space due to the housing/space issue. *crosses fingers jumping about "i can wait till i can get a regular gym membership, then it won't matter about room in the house"*

mark- so far so good. gotta run down stairs to cover the front desk... i'll be back...

PoisonedApple 14-05-2010 06:04 PM

*pokes head in*
hmmm no one around anymore huh?

frenchhorn 14-05-2010 06:18 PM

Hi Crimson how are you?

PoisonedApple 14-05-2010 06:27 PM

I'm doing ok. Holding up. Trying to get a lot of work done (so I can leave early) but that's not going as well as hoped since I'm not focusing and retaining as well as I should. *shrugs* Other than that I'm doing pretty good. D decided to take us both (and only the 2 of us for once) out to a movie -Ironman 2- and we might stop by Crush before that (Crush is like a cafe but with wine and appetizers instead of coffee and cakes... he promised we'd go when we could afford it when it opened last fall). And hopefully I can get gym shoes and a membership soon. The gym seems to help me quite a bit. I dunno if it's that I can work off the stress or because it gets me out of the house or if its just the endorphins but whatever it is seems to work to get me half way stable on the days I feel like crap.

How are you doing today? And you'll post pics of the new haircut right?

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