*crawls in* i can't do this anymore. ..


Laura, i've tried to reach amy but she doesn't want to come out or be talked with. your guess is as good as mine on the blue. I've never seen that before, but i know I had the night from hell last night with rapid internal switches. I tried to pin it down, but all i got was that it's male and seems to be some kind of gaurdian, except things went wrong last night because obviously i missed the warning. I had so many voices saying different things with different agendas that i just wanted to internally scream to shut them all off. shadow was lurking again, so i'm going to have to investigate if i can exactly what he's capable of, and i guess, rather bitterly accept him as in existence.

i'm a mess.

April *catches your hug* needed that, thanks sweet

kat i'm here if u wanna talk

thanks julie. i'm rather shell-shocked. i've never had a night like that, and i havn't had a chance to talk it over with anyone yet

well we're all ears hun

*crawls into her tent, in her corner, and settles in once more with her stuffed lamb, pillow, and blanket, all to have a good cry* And what's worse is I cut and they sting :pinch:

*crawls to tent and passes through soothing lotion* i'm sorry you cut hun

Julie: im so confused i dont know what to think. I dont want shadow to be real, but something made me hurt myself last night, not like SI, more self abuse. It was so noisy in there that i wanted to run away from my own head. i've no idea who blue is, but he staged a takeover bid last night and i havn't had anything like that happen in years. i thought i'd got us all figured. seems i'm wrong. *sighs* it's all too complicated.

i kinda no how u feel it's so hard to keep track of them all

i thought i had it. i was worried about shadow's existence, but this blue has come out of, well the blue. I'm calling him blue because i couldn't get a name from him last night and i have no time to do journal work to discover more cos my daughter is awake and hubby isn't and we've got to get to church soon.

Thanks Kat. Tis no big deal, I suppose. I'm very sorry you're having such a rough time of it *hugs* Wish I could help.

big deal or not, cuts need care, and care i can give *hugs forever broken back* thanks for the hug. what's your name hun?

I go by Ally here and it is very nice to meet you.

Unfortunately it is after midnight here and I've got to get up and get to church early tomorrow so I am off to bed. Please have a good day, the both of you. And feel free to use the tent ;-) Tis a good corner, that and the tent, though brand new, isn't bad either, lol.

Good night (and thanks for the hug Kat, I needed it)

*nods* yes amy i have and it confuses me *cries* i just dont know who i am anymore

Hi all. *waves at those who don't like hugs and hugs the rest*

I've missed 10 or so pages so won't be doing individual replies.
I think I saw a return of Ally and Emma though so *big hugs* to both of you - if you are able to accept them. If not, please take my warm wishes.

*hugs the regular ward-mates with the usual addendum then disappears into a dark corner to cry*

*crawls into the corner with kahlia and cries too* nice to meet you ally. I might just sneak into your tent later.

hmm? sorry amy, I didn't quite get your question.

*hug kat* That sounds quite overwhelming. Im sorry that everyone was yelling in your head last night.. I hope you can figure out about who the blue person is and that the shadow can be kept at bay.

*hugs julie*
*hugs amy*

*hugs everyone else*

I spy Kahlia! *cuddles* How r u today?

I'm off to bed soon.. its almost 3am so i figured i better sleep at some point heh.