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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

jonikd 04-05-2010 01:00 PM

Awww thanks Owen, I know hugging's not really your thing and I appreciate it :) How you doing? What's Julie up to?

xxjuliexx 04-05-2010 01:01 PM

hi oliver i is okish just so sleepy

lynx 04-05-2010 01:03 PM

Can I join? I feel horrible :-( I found an old series of blog entries which have shocked me in a way... I remember knitting the sweater I wrote about, I remember going to Ghent with Wesley, I kind of remember how I went to the psychologist and she told me not to be so hard on myself... I don't remember, however, writing about it and all the crap I found in that blog. I only managed to maintain it for 3 months so I guess it was a fase, but what kind of fase??? I remember going to the psychologist to tell her I was fine. That doesn't make sense? Also I wrote that "now I'm young I want to do stupid things, I don't care if I'm traceable through the internet"??? What the hell?

My eating has been very low lately. Either I binge or I eat little. I'm supposed to be ill today but I know why that is: I ****ed up. Badly. I want to eat oatmeal for breakfast and I want to drink lots and lots of milk and eat fruit, but I need someone to nurture me. I can't go to Tom's because I have to go to work tomorrow. I know I could go, though, but there would be very little sense to make out of that.

For the rest of it I can't stop crying/cutting. I think I'm going to clean up the mess in my room for a bit. Then maybe eat something. I want to get out of here, I want to live my own life whatever the hell that may mean. I want a house and I want my boyfriend here with me. I feel so lonely right now...

xxjuliexx 04-05-2010 01:05 PM

hi lynx i is owen -gives lynx a model aeroplane-

jonikd 04-05-2010 01:08 PM

*rolls out welcome mat for Lynx* Course you can come in here, sounds like you need some of our world famous care and support. Hugs are also readily available if you like them. I am JK, and I'm off to bed, but there are lots of others around and no doubt on their way so they will look after you *nods*

Enjoy your stay, *grins and wanders to bed*

xxjuliexx 04-05-2010 01:10 PM

night jk

lynx 04-05-2010 01:16 PM

Thanks, JK. Night night. *hug*

lynx 04-05-2010 01:16 PM

Hi, Owen *tries to smile* *hug*

xxjuliexx 04-05-2010 01:20 PM

i... i um -tenses shoulders and wriggles slightly-

frenchhorn 04-05-2010 01:34 PM

HI Lynx, *hugs*
*waves to Owen*
*hugs JK goodnight*

*sits in corner crying*

MammaMia 04-05-2010 01:42 PM

*hugs everyone, but waves to Owen & then sits with Oliver*

What's wrong honey? :(

Welcome Lynx, JK was very right in what she said about us :)

Sorry I'm still not really doing individual replies, but I really do care about each and everyone of you. No harming if we can try please & we're all amazing people. No matter what we ourselves may believe/be told :(

To everyone who asked...it was good hyper :) Kept listening to old songs, as was making a song list for my 21st party. Which isn't for another 10 months yet. Wooops!!! Suposse to be seeing the boyfriend today as haven't seen him for a wee while :( Was going to have my blood taken today, but don't know if I feel up to it. I feel low..

Doikers 04-05-2010 01:45 PM

*hugs April* Virtual lunch it is , I'm having the carb free Virtual Pasta :) what are you having ? Anyone else care to join us for lunch ?

*Hugs JK* It's good to take things one day at a time , baby steps ok , and you will come through the other side , you WILL

*Hugs Oliver* I hope your phone call goes well with your Mum , Sending positive thoughts if ok ?

*Waves at Owen* How are you ?

*Spots a Helen* How are you today Helen?

Doikers 04-05-2010 01:47 PM

*Hugs Lynx* HI I'm Mark , I'm sorry you feel so crappy but we all here will listen to you and help any way we can :) We're a friendly bunch

frenchhorn 04-05-2010 01:51 PM

thanks Mark *hugs*
*hugs Helen*
had the phone call it was horrible, basically my mum had a talk with my sister last night and my sister just basically doesn't want to know me anymore, my mum said she should talk to someone, but my sister refused and shouted at my mum that she must never tell anyone my sister knows. My mum kept saying its hard for Ellie, saying she has lost a sister, yes ok in a way she has, but I'm still here still the same person and its hard for me to.
I hate the fact I have upset her, but someone on another forum said I havn't done anything wrong, which I guess is true, all I'm doing is trying to live my life truthfully, in a way not telling people would be doing something wrong because then I would be living a lie.

sorry for the lack of replies, I can't keep up at the moment, keep just randomly crying and got to go in a minute to my counselling session and got a 3 hour rehearsal tonight, which I am already anxious about and I really don't want to have a panic attack.

*hugs all those who want hugs*
*curls up crying in a dark corner*

MammaMia 04-05-2010 01:53 PM

Mark, I answered your question in the post above yours :P

Oliver, I'm so sorry sweet. Maybe she'll talk again and just needs to process it in her head & stuff? I hope you don't have a panic attack and that your counselling & rehearsal goes well.

I spy April *jumps on*

Scarletdreamer 04-05-2010 01:56 PM

JK, love, people on here DO care... I'm sorry that you feel like they don't IRL, but we do on here... so I'm glad that you posted & updated us. :) I'm so sorry to hear about your friend & the funeral, and how triggered you were... :( That really is yuck, but at least you're maybe doing a bit better now? I hope you have a good night... *hugs gently* And you're welcome for me asking... I care about you and everyone else in here... quite a lot actually. *cuddles*

I spy a Mark and an Oliver!! :)

*waves at Owen* How're you doing? I have some clay over here if you want to help me make a pot, I really suck at pottery but it's a lot of fun if you have the time. :)

I'm so tired... got up at 6:30ish after dozing from 6ish on... have nothing scheduled today but will be working like a fiend (I hope!!) on my health psych and soc papers. Ugh. I really don't want to do any of that, but... oh well. :( I am so "over" uni it's not even funny... I just want to be done. The end is soo close but I can't see myself getting there. I guess somehow I will? but I am close to being suicidal, so... well, yeah. :-X

I'll try to stay on here a lot today though - WoW is down for maintenance, it usually is on Tuesdays, from 8am-2pm my time, so that gives me plenty of time to work on stuff. My mum might be coming over too, so that would be nice. :) Played WoW this morning with Jarrod's 80 paladin helping my "wittle wogue" (little rogue) who just dinged level 22 and is now halfway through it!! :D And that's not even with the Refer-A-Friend account. So I like having help with quests... lol. She hit level 20 what, day before yesterday? so yeah... :)

I'm worried about tomorrow... I have to go be interviewed by my internship supervisor. I'm pretty much accepted for the internship, I just have to figure out hours and such. Oh, and I also have to let her know that I might have to have my wisdom teeth out during the internship so that may interfere with hours. :-X I don't know though. I am NOT looking forward to that... :-/

Anyway, enough waffling, sorry... :o

*hides in a deep, dark, invisible hole in the corner*

Scarletdreamer 04-05-2010 02:03 PM

Hels, you must've had your invisibility cloak on again!! :P Shame shame... lol. I'm glad that it was a good hyper. *glomps* :) How are you doing this morning? feeling low, you said... as low as you have been or a bit better? I hope the latter... :)

Mark, what sauce are you having on your carb-free pasta? :D *cuddles* I'll have, ummmm... *thinks hard* Well, I guess I'll go with the breakfast-for-lunch thing and have carb-free blueberry pancakes (the sweetish kind) and cholesterol- and calorie-free tapioca pudding. Lol. :D Anyone else care to join??

Oliver, I'm awfully sorry to hear that about your sister... *holds you gently and rubs your back, if that's okay?* That's really rough. But, as I said, I guess the only thing you can do is give her time. She might come 'round, might not, but it's about YOU, and how YOU live your life... which is also rough to take, I know, but as you said, it's about living your life truthfully, and I'm proud of you for doing that. :) *big bear cuddles*

Nighty night, JK. Pleasant dreams. *cuddles*

Tineke!! *glomps* I'm so sorry that you're not doing too well at the moment... but you can definitely come in here, it moves quickly so try not to be overwhelmed... but I'm glad that you hunted us out. :D Have missed talking with you. *gentle cuddles*


MammaMia 04-05-2010 02:04 PM

Feeling low as I have, I scared myself earlier. I don't know if I meant to do it for the reasons you normally do...but hmmm =/

*hides*

Doikers 04-05-2010 02:19 PM

Hmmmm Tomato and herb and chilli sauce for my pasta methinks. April I've never had tapioca , is it nice?

lynx 04-05-2010 02:47 PM

*Hugs everyone*

Aw April :-) *hugs*

I had French fries and skimmed milk. Weird combo, I know, but it's better than having loads of sugar. I feel nauseous most of the time and I cry a lot.
The following content has been hidden - Reason : SI trig
I cut in my calf yesterday and it bled a little.


I feel like my life is passing me by...

I had a shower with most of my clothes on and it made me feel warm inside. I'm fairly calm now. I hope Tom is doing well in studying. Might as well be that he's having as large a crisis as I am atm. Idk.

*Hugs all*


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