Rara Avis/Alex is in ICU nowAny messages of support would be greatly appreciated
 

Alex has had a psychotic episode where he felt he needed to complete a mission. Having feeling he failed that the voices told him he must kill himself. Already feeling close to suicide Alex took a lethal amount of tranquillisers and is in the critical care unit with heart problems. He was in the cardiac unit for a little while as he seemed to have stabilised, but he's still in trouble.
Thanks
Ashton

Alex, thinking of you and holding you in the Light.

*hugs* Wishing you strength in this Rara

He's in my thoughts and prayers

Edited

Oh god, I hope he is doing okay. He doesn't deserve to suffer the way he does.
I will thinking of him and praying.
Thank you for letting us know
xox

*sending love and hugs*

I hope he's okay <3

x Katie x

Keep fighting, you can get through this. I know things are tough now but I sincerely hope you pull through this and we are here for you every single step of the way. Don't give up.

Ash, thanks for letting us know, hope you're okay.
Aimee

Thinking of you Alex.x

Thinking about you :hug:

Alex get well soon! No one deserves this. Please fight and pull through this.

I'm still on Alex's iPad. Alex is out of critical care and in the cardiac unit. He is stable now. And is on the mend. Thanks everyone for the replies, words of care and encouragement.

Aww :( That's terrible. I pray he gets better

Sending healing vibes.

Omg just realized I accidentally wrote she. Woops. I'm glad HE is getting better and I hope he continues to improve :-)

*update*

Thanks everyone, I'm sure Alex appreciates all the Well wishes. He is set to be coming back to the hospital tomorrow most likely. The Drs just want to make sure he stays stable. From the semi-coherent texts I have received today (from the overdose and the psychosis) he may have problems with his heart. He is also quite distressed at being under such close observation and thinks the Drs are doing experiments on him. He's doing it tough. Plus he isn't allowed his medication for a little while after the overdose.
Thanks again everyone.

Poor Alex, he really is going through hell!
I am praying for him and sending him healing vibes. I really hope his mental state starts to improve soon because he sounds like he is in a terrifying place constantly and he doesn't deserve it.

Much love to him and you
Emma xxxx

Hope you get better soon.

I'm glad to hear Alex is doing better physically, but sorry he is having such a tough time. Holding you in the Light.

Ashton, thanks very much for updating us, please look after yourself too.

Thank you everyone. It's so nice to come back and see all the messages. Much appreciated, thank you.
I'm on 15 minute obs at the moment, not allowed off the unit and getting my heart rate checked a lot. I may have a problem with my heart, I'm seeing a specialist about it. They said my not eating makes it worse. I don't trust them, they are just Sybots posing as means to experiment on me. I kept trying to pull the drips/IVs out because they were making me dizzy, disoriented and confused. They wouldn't let me go to the bathroom, they held me down and the inevitable happened. The Spybots are horrible torturers. I still failed my mission and don't see much point carrying on like this. I feel like I have no power at all.

Hi Alex, I am really really glad you are still here.

It must be horrible having everyone watching and telling you what to do, I know it was when I was in hospital. But I'm afraid the best way to get them to give you some space is to do what the hospital want for a bit, even if you don't agree with it. You could think about it like going undercover?

I don't know much about the Spybots, but I am ok, promise, and everything here seems as it should be. If you stick around, you will be able to go back to uni.

How are your rats doing? Wonder if anyone could bring them in to see you? I think that would be really funny.

I am behaving. They still have me on 15 minute obs. That's a good idea, I'll look at it like going undercover, I like that. Undercover.

I think you are ok too. I'm glad things are as they should be there.

My rats are good and being looked after by my brother and mother. Unfortunately I'm not allowed to have someone bring them in.

I'm tired

Am not surprised you are tired, you have been through a lot lately. How is your sleeping now?
I reckon if you managed to drink the special drinks, you would have a bit more energy and be less tired, but I know this is difficult for you.

I hated having to 'behave' in hospital, but it really is the quickest way to get them to stop hassling you as much. Is there anything you can try doing as a distraction from all the stuff that's going on around you - do you have Lego or anything like that?

Oh well, you will just have to see your rats when you get home - I expect your brother is enjoying them. When I was inpatient, one of the staff brought her new puppy in to meet everyone. It was lovely, very curious and friendly. But I suppose not everyone is so keen on rats.

Thanks Duck for your continued support, I really appreciate it.

My sleeping is poor, though slightly better than before, got two and a bit last night.
I know gpyou are right about the drinks, but you're right I find it really difficult to take them.

It is hard to behave, but i will do my best. I wish I had some Lego, i might see if mother can buy me some and I'll pay her back.
I've been drawing/writing in my art journal when I have the focus. And watching movies.

My brother is enjoying my rats,nthey are being well taken care of.
That's really cool about the patient that brought innthebpuppy, that would have been great.

No worries, I am ever so glad you are still here. I'm sorry it usually takes me a while to reply, I'm in the UK so on the wrong time-zone.

What things in particular are making it difficult to sleep?
Have you tried yoga? I find that even if I can't sleep, yoga helps me to feel less groggy and tired. There's some good yoga practice videos on Youtube if you have access?

Drawing & movies sounds like a really good idea, so does asking your Mum to bring in some Lego. What sort of things do you build with your Lego?

I did lots of colouring in when I was in hospital, it is good because you don't need to concentrate so much. I also made things out of Plasticine, and did some sewing (though I had to be somewhere the nurses could see me to be allowed sewing kit).

Thinking of 'normal' things to do in hospital is a really good way to stay 'undercover'. It is also good to make it less boring for you.

It was a lovely puppy - a black Labrador. I think it would be great if all wards had pets for people on them to look after and stroke. Another ward I was on had fish, and I used to clean out the fish tank - it was really good to be able to do something useful, and relaxing to watch the fish.

I'm glad to hear you are getting better physically Rara. It must be really hard for you to go through this, but I'm glad you are still fighting and being brave! I hope you will be able to rest and get more sleep to help with your recovery. I agree with Duck, maybe yoga could help with that?

It's good that you have some distractions, drawing and watching movies sounds nice and I hope you will be able to get some Lego, that's a good idea.

It's unfortunate that you can't have someone bring your rats in, but hopefully you will get to see them soon!

I'll be thinking of you. Please take care of yourself. x

Duck, no need to apologise. I understand.

My Dr thinks i have insomnia, i don't get much sleep at all. Even with sleeping tablets.
I could try some yoga, I've never done it before.

I'm ordering a remote control car by meccano. Mum doesn't have the time. Last admission i built city jails, fire stations, the ones for little kids, It was fun and took my mind off things.

I will try to do some more drawing and i have some modelling clay type stuff to use too. I'm glad you had things like that to do in hospital.

I agree it would be good to have pets in hospitals. though obviously they cant for many reasons,
thanks for your reply Duck. Stay safe

Thanks Reki,
I don't feel very brave, i feel weak and powerless.
My distractions help some, but not all of the time.nI've been watching Resident Evil because i love zombie movies and Milla Jovovich is stunning.
i look forward to seeing my rats.
Thanks fornthe care Reki,
You take care.

Hey ash, please tell Alex I really miss him and that I really hope he feels better soon, I wish I could do more for him, can you also give him a giant hug for me

A remote control car sounds like a good thing to build. My friend had a remote control Dalek, and she made it follow her psychiatrist round the hospital, shouting 'EXTERMINATE'. Very silly, but funny!

I like zombies too, but my favourite zombie film is Shaun of the Dead because it is funny. My friends joke that I am a zombie in disguise, because I am a bit obsessed by brains (I used to study psychology & neuroscience).

Someone made Shaun of the Dead scenes out of Lego! http://www.flickr.com/photos/yatkuu/...n/photostream/

Casey, I'm back now. Ash gave me a hug for you too. I look forward to talking to you later.

Duck,
I'm looking forward to getting the remote control car, it will be fun. What your friend did sounds very funny, and entertaining.
Shaun of the dead is good too. That Lego picture was cool!
Brains are very fascinating that's true.

Having a hard day with the voices today.

I am sorry you are having a tough time with the voices today. How are the staff at the hospital? Can you talk to them?

Glad you're back!

I'm sorry you're still struggling but I hope things start looking better soon. *hugs*

I'm sorry you've been struggling with the voices Rara, I hope you're feeling a bit better now. *hugs*

I do think you are brave for holding on even though things are so tough for you right now, you are definitely not weak or powerless. I know you've been trying really hard and I admire that, I hope things will get better for you.

I've never seen Resident Evil but I've been wanting to watch it for a long time, I heard it's really good! I enjoy zombie movies too, and I agree, Milla Jovovich is beautiful. :) A remote control car sounds fun, I hope you'll have lot of fun with it! I'm glad the distractions are helping a bit, and I'm sure your rats are looking forward to seeing you too!

Take care of yourself. x

It's Ash here, Alex is having a really difficult time with the voices at the moment and he is delusional. He's in ICU which he is hating, but it's for his safety. He is being very brave as he is a little frightened by what the voices are telling him. But he is hanging in there.
Thanks everyone

Thanks for letting us know, please tell Alex I'm thinking about him.

Thank you for letting us know. I hope Alex will feel better soon. x

Hi Alex,
Still thinking of you and praying for you.
I hope your Meccano car arrives soon, and you are well enough to be out of ICU to enjoy it.

So many positive thoughts and healing prayers are coming your way Alex. I'm so sorry you've been dealing with this recently, you're in my prayers tonight xx

Thank you to everyone who replied Alex will be very happy to see all the care here.
He is still in ICU and hearing voices telling him to do harmful things, and having delusions. He isn't well and the medication either hasn't kicked in or isn't working. So he will be in there a bit longer.
I see him at meal times, and we catch up briefly. In the mean time he has given me his iPad as he can't have power cords in the ICU.
Ash

I hope that Alex recovers soon. Psychosis is very scary to experience. I hope that the psychosis eases soon.