*sends warm wishes, thoughts, and prayers Kat's way as well* I will send you a cuddle in a package also, that you can use when you feel safe enough to. Sound okay? I'm so sorry about all that's happened... and I don't blame you for being shaky and restless and having such a fear response. I would too. Jarrod and I will be praying for you tonight... ♥

Kahlia, how are you doing? *cuddles*

Nicole, welcome back!! why are you feeling like ****? *cuddles*

Oliver!! *glomps back* Good luck with the end of year recital - I'm sure you'll do fine. :D But sending you warm wishes and good thoughts... :) How else have you been doing??

Hels, where are you today? haven't seen you about. *cuddles*

Laura, best of luck at your job!! I'm sure you'll be fine. Update us when you can!! :D *cuddles*

Mark, I'm sorry that you can't sleep... hopefully you can now... and I hope that you didn't have to cut to sleep. :( Sending cuddles and prayers your way. *tucks you up into your ward bed* :)

*waves at Owen* How're you doing?

Just got back from a partial hike... I am pathetically out of shape and fat. :'(

*hides in a deep dark corner of the warren* :'(

*hugs Kat* I know the "I just wish I could calm down" feeling hun.

are*hugs kat, april band kahlia*
sorry kat :( just a bit distracted at the moment
april-thanks, and cause im feeling suicidall, and then the only place my mum would let me stay was at my aunties, and i can see the train station from the bedroom window, the same train station where 2 people have commited suicide this week.........

*cuddles april* i'm safe enough now, I think all that will hit me later, I get delayed responses...

*cuddles nicole* thats ok. me too!

*hugs kat* bless. urgh. i dunno what to do :(

*hugs nicole* me neither. talking to an ex of mine who was really affected by stuff I did, and stuff another girl of his did... he's so in denial about it all, frustrating..but distracting though.

*hugs kat* aaw :( at least youve got a distraction though, everyone here is talking about the 2 suicides, and triggering me even more :O

aww hunny, thats not good. try to block them out if you can. can you listen to music? or perhaps play a game?

my auntie and uncle are sleeping. urgh urgh urgh, i just saw my teachers name on name on the school website and it brought back EVERYTHING :(

aww hun. is there anything I can do? -offers safe hugs if you can-

*cuddles both Nicole & Kat* sorry, that's all i'm able to offer at the moment... am not in a good place. :'(

updated r/v.......... :'(

*thanks and hugs* i dont know. i just feel. blah. i dont know what to do or where to live because i cant stay at home anymore as all my family hate me, school is crap and upsets me, and nothing seems worth it anymore

*cuddles everyone*

*huggles april* I read your RV, and I'm so sorry that everything is such a struggle for you right now. I understand about the comments you made further up your thread about being christian and a survivor, all i can say is hunny, is that it is a really hard place to be, and i havn't figured it all out yet, but hopefully one day soon the Good Lord will help me with it. In the meanwhile, don't try to analyse your actions too much, let God do the judging after all, He should know ;)

I will PM you tommorow with my other thoughts on your RV, but tonight i'm sorry hun, i'm a little ploughed under with all this thats going on. Love and prayers hun.

nicole: I'm sorry you're feeling like that. I know nothing about your situation. can you live alone? maybe it'll give you some independance/healing space? do you have a friend you could move in with?

*cuddles helen* thanks lovely. how are you?

*offers hugs to everyone who wants*
x

the only person i could move in with is my cousin and my mum wouldnt let me :( *hugs april. kat and helen*

*hugs nicole* ah, I see. I guess then in one way, you've got to wait it out for a couple of years :( until you're 18. sorry hun.

uhuh. but then, im pretty sure that if i carry on living there, im not gonna make it to my 18th birthday.

*curls up in bed and sleeps*
im lonely =\

*huggles nicole* aww hunny. if your situation at home is really bad, is there anyone you could tell? see if you can get some advice/support?

*cuddles heather* so tired. i should sleep too.

try and get some sleep hun? <3 *offers cuddles back*

Kat, I don't know how I am. Thought I was okay but struggling to cope with things. Keep getting sad at night. Sure it won't be long before I'm down, then low, then suicidal again. I can't go through all this again :'(

*cuddles kat* i have my therapist, but i dont feel comfortable speaking to her, i do with my group therapist but they arent supposed to deal with individual problems :(

*cuddles helen* i'm sorry you're going through this. Night is always the worst. Try to remember that morning is only a few hours away and the sun will bring a new chance. Sorry I have nothing more.

*enjoys heather's cuddle* thanks hun. yeah i'm gonna give sleep a shot. Hubs is here now.

*huggles nicole* hmm, i'm gonna have to think about that one and get back to you. it depends if your being at home is a real welfare issue or not.

Okay everyone, i'm gonna have to sleep, i'm so shot. I can't handle everything thats going round in my head and sleep is the only safe place right now. i hope. take care everyone, love and prayers headed out your way.

*hugs kat* its just i cants handle my sister bullying me anymore and i hate being blamed for everything :(

I missed 6 pages since I last posted, so I'm just going to skip individual replies this time around. I did read it all though, so my thoughts go out to each and every member on here <3

*big group hug, and no-calorie cookies all around!*

To all the newcomers, or oldcomers who came back, hi :) I'm Taz.

*offers hugs and safe love and care packages to all*

Am very, very cold. Have started the enrolment process for Stage 2 of my Diploma. Just got to wait for them to let me have access to my course materials. *sigh* I hate playing the waiting game.

Hi hi Laura.

I should post my others in my siggy

Hi everyone. *waves meekly*

I think I need a cookie.

*offers Jess (I think that was your name??) a cookie* Enjoy :)

*waves to Becca*

*hugs Kahlia* Waiting games always suck, no matter what you're waiting for... :( How're your assessments going? (I think that was you at least... correct me if I'm wrong though >< I lose track of everyone on here)

Thanks. :) *hug*

Hey Becca, how are you going? *hugs*

Jessica: I hope you found a cookie! *hugs*

Taz: Yah, waiting games suck! My assessments came back Successful! So Stage 1 is Passed! Now I want to do Stage 2 but have to wait *huggles*

I am meh now.

*hugs all around*

*waves hello to all who dropped in the psych ward. Leaves some chocolate panna cottas in the fridge for dessert* Yeah, been trying to perfect them lol


*Hides in the corner with a blanket over his head*

Keep well over there julie?

hey owen =] how're u

Hey owen and heather :-)

How u keeping up there heather?

*takes one the yummy treats left and happily noms* Thanks Jet I am okay.

Hi Owen why do you feel icky

how come fill icky owen?

im kayish... feel huge tho. and am on so owwy cramps =[

*cuddles all*
sorry for lack of individual replies, but I'm too anxious and concentrating on my recital too much, which is in 3 hours and 45 mins ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
*breathes calmly in a hiding place*

That was a crap night.

I dont think I want to do this anymore. I dont want to be let down anymore. I dont want to fight anymore.

I'm so angry. So wound up. So pissed off. I just want to go out and grr, ****.

Why can't anything ever be simple? *cries*

*offers kat huggles*

*accepts huggles* I wish I had some obvious illness..like cancer or something.. *clings*..I hate the justice system..*cries* I just want to curl up and give up. I dont want to carry on.

EDIT: updated RV. :S :( :'(

Kat It sounds horrible what you are going through*Hugs if you can accept them *
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NICOLE!!HEY :) DO you have any distractions you could do? or some calming tea?*Hugs*
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*Hugs Heather*
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*Hugs Helen*
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*Hugs Kahlia*
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*Hugs April*
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*Hugs Taz*
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*Hugs Anarchistl0ve*
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*Hugs wolfos3d*
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*Hugs Jetforce*
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*Hugs Oliver* you must be performing as I type :)