Whats happening to me? ED??

[Loops]

Not sure whats been happening to me the last month or so.
Been getting help for my SI with a private therapist which is ok.

But the last month or so started taking diet pills and laxatives and i don't even know why, not sure what made me buy them. Just know at the minute it makes me feel so much better. I originally said to myself i'd just take a few to and just for a little while, but now people keep saying how good i look and commenting on my weight loss (not much maybe half a stone) and although i know i should stop a big part of me doesn't want to.
I haven't binged, except once and i felt horrible afterwards and tried to make myself sick but couldn't, ended up lying on the bathroom floor crying feeling like a failure coz i couldn't even do that right, then ended up cutting again.
Don't know whats happening to me or why i'm being so self destructive. Although i've had a history or SI i've never ever had an eating disorder before. Its only been about a month would that even be classified as having an ED?
I don't know how to tell my therapist as i have no clue at all where this has all come from.
Could i be doing myself damage? Help?! x

[beautiful&dying]

We can't diagnose you here hun, we're not doctors, but it sounds like you are having some issues that could be potentially dangerous. I'd urge you to speak to your private therapist or GP about this regarding whether you're able to get some more help. Really this is a road you don't want to go down, it'll be much easier getting out now than in months or even years time.
Here if you need me
xxxxxxxxxx

[Loops]

Thanks so replying,
Will try and work up the courage to tell my therapist, just no ides what has possessed me to start this, and worse i think i like it ><
Thanks again x

[Slip]

I agree with Helen, try & ask for help before it develops into whatever it will develop in to...its way harder to get out once the hole you have dug around you is to deep.

[beautiful&dying]

Sometimes it's that people are turning from one method of self harm to another, but things can easily take a massive turn for the worst and then you'll find that you can't get out, and I would hate this to be the case for you or this to happen to you. Sometimes it's easier to start with saying something like "there is an issue I'd like some help with as well as the self injury, it's that I've been doing some unhealthy things with food and eating.." and take it from there, I'm sure she'll give you questions that you can try and answer. Good luck hun and let us know how it goes.
xxxxxxxxx

[Margo]

Print off your first post and give it to your therapist.