what do i want?

[Merc]

thats what it comes down to

i dont know
stay with familar or leave for unknown?

ever known anger has a taste?
It does

Ever know rejection/betrayal has a taste too?
they do...

and they're awful.



and they wont goaway.

I dont want to talk
i dont want to explain
i dont want a hug
i dont want anything at all
im losing what meant the very most to me
and
i dont think i care



i may be around but i doubt i'll be replying.
sorry but i have too much rite now and cant handle any more pain and loss
sorry

romp

[effervescence]

romp, honey. i wont give you hugs, then. but you should keep talking. i know its an effort. what are you losing? i would say leave for the unknown. take risks. discover new things. but i dont know the situation.

[Pomegranate]

Romp you want something or else you wouldn't have posted. Chloe is right, keep talking, if nothing else it will keep it being so bottled up in side. Try to take care of yourself.

[pea soup]

im not sure how to reply romp.
normally i would give some snuggles.
im not sure what the situation is so i dont know how to try and help.
maybe if you give us a bit more info....we might be able to help more.
love you.
xxxxxxxx

[chocostashchick]

oops sorry i hugged you before i read it all

i´m thinking of you
and i feel so just bizarre at the moment
so all i can think is that i relate so much about the not caring
i totally get it hun

so maybe i missed a post but what are you losing? what happened?
i´m sorry honey and i am thinking of you
i send you support and love from spain! aren´t you lucky
(that isnt meant to be sarcastic even though i hate spain right now)
xxxooo

[Snorkmaiden]

You know its best to get things off your chest when you feel the need to do so, so please do so. Or if not, I hope things were/are clearer after some sleep. xx

[Casper_Fading]

YOu want... reassurance? I'm not sure what you want. I KNOW you want to be well and happy. And I Know that you CAN get there bt could take a while. It's hard sweetheart. Getting to that stage where smiling and laughing doesn't shock you. It's strange. Scary too. But it will come. It's hard to leave behind the familiarlarity of depression and darkness. So hard. YOu CAN do this. Is thatwhat you want? Someone to tell you that you can DO this. I know you can.

Love you sweetheart

[Merc]

the stay or go bit was
do i leave my beautiful hubby to someone less hassle ot stay...
thank you all...sooo much.
ESPECIALLY after saying something so mean as ' i dont want hugs'
that has been on my mind all night
im so sorry, it was such a terrible thing to say
romp

[effervescence]

thats ok. we all say stuff like that sometimes....i can be very selfish in the virtual psych ward, luckily they humour me in there :)

[Casper_Fading]

Why is it a horrible thing to say? All of us have said it at some point, it's just a way of expressing that you're feeling like rubbish. Don't worrya bout it. TALK TO YOUR HUBBY! That's the best optin. Talk to him. Tell him what you're thinking. Tell him what's in yoru heart.

[Merc]

you'll be glad to know i did jess :o)
wish me luck
most of all wih they dont turbn me away ...again
love ya girl, im gonna miss you if i go
romp