olive25_55
10-04-2015, 09:45 PM
Hello,
I have been suffering with mental health issues for 8 years now... but something has changed and it is scaring me.. I am 24 and feel like I have done everything I can do. I feel like nothing is good enough and that I am the laughing stock to everyone!
I hear voices... that is something that hasn't happened in a few years. Before it was just something criticising my every move. Now - I can hear them... I can hear people that I can't see. They are saying that I am a fake... that my meds are placebos. They are laughing at me behind my back. Also, I am convinced that the classes I teach are set up.. like they are not real and I have been given them so the people in my department can watch me fail. I feel like I am failing. I'm sure they are getting some great laughs out of watching me try. I have also started to isolate myself more, because another thing I am convinced of is that people do not want to be my friend... they just feel stuck which is why they still talk to me but they don't actually want to. I keep hearing these voices... hearing people talk about me and it is making me not want to go out of my house. I don't want to have to face these people. Every step I take out of my house is another person judging me. It's another voice in my head saying how pathetic I am. How much of a joke I am.
I don't know what to do. I've tried telling my mental health team but I feel like they are laughing at me too. Like they are also setting me up. Has anyone ever felt like this before?
It was so bad the other night when I saw some friends that I had the worst panic attack that I have ever had and I hit my head so hard, I am still in pain from it.
If anyone has any advice on what to do? I don't want to throw my life away but it is slipping out of my hands and I want it back.. I never asked for this and I certainly do not want to feel like this.. I need help but I don't know where to go.. I don't know what to do anymore.
Thank you for reading this...
I have been suffering with mental health issues for 8 years now... but something has changed and it is scaring me.. I am 24 and feel like I have done everything I can do. I feel like nothing is good enough and that I am the laughing stock to everyone!
I hear voices... that is something that hasn't happened in a few years. Before it was just something criticising my every move. Now - I can hear them... I can hear people that I can't see. They are saying that I am a fake... that my meds are placebos. They are laughing at me behind my back. Also, I am convinced that the classes I teach are set up.. like they are not real and I have been given them so the people in my department can watch me fail. I feel like I am failing. I'm sure they are getting some great laughs out of watching me try. I have also started to isolate myself more, because another thing I am convinced of is that people do not want to be my friend... they just feel stuck which is why they still talk to me but they don't actually want to. I keep hearing these voices... hearing people talk about me and it is making me not want to go out of my house. I don't want to have to face these people. Every step I take out of my house is another person judging me. It's another voice in my head saying how pathetic I am. How much of a joke I am.
I don't know what to do. I've tried telling my mental health team but I feel like they are laughing at me too. Like they are also setting me up. Has anyone ever felt like this before?
It was so bad the other night when I saw some friends that I had the worst panic attack that I have ever had and I hit my head so hard, I am still in pain from it.
If anyone has any advice on what to do? I don't want to throw my life away but it is slipping out of my hands and I want it back.. I never asked for this and I certainly do not want to feel like this.. I need help but I don't know where to go.. I don't know what to do anymore.
Thank you for reading this...