I messed up again... *Contains illicit drugs & Alcohol*

[stumpy]

I got so angry about my counsellor being changed that I lost sight of my goal, I had a binge on Stella, then did some speed, I don't know why I keep doing this, I should have better control over this by now, I should have said no when the speed was shoved under my nose, but I wasn't strong enough.

I'm not seeing my counsellor now until a week Friday, Mind is shut tomorrow because it's Easter, I might go over to the drug and alcohol agency on Tuesday, see if I can have a chat with someone there, I'm struggling to keep myself safe and drug free since the new girl moved to my village, she keeps putting pressure on me to have some speed with her, keeps shoving it under my nose and doesn't except no for an answer :angry:

I want out of here, to somewhere safe where I don't have temptation, whilst I make myself stronger, strong enough to stick to my decision of no means no :-(

[dragon uk]

sorry to hear things have taken a turn for the worst, are their any helplines you can try accessing while waiting for servicing to open again.

hope that your new counsellor is helpful

[stumpy]

My new counsellor was rubbish, and I haven't seen the counsellor I've now been transferred to, to speak to, this is because 1) he's my dads counsellor 2) he went on holiday so wasn't even in work on that Friday, I see him this Friday, but am only going to have a very brief chat, and give him a letter written by the co-ordinator of Mind who agrees with me that considering he's my dads counsellor, it's un-ethical for me to see him also as a counsellor.

Now I'm much worse, I've had so much stress from this new girl creating chaos in the village, the police have been involved as she burgled and trashed my friends house (my friend has Aspergers Syndrome), he's been staying with me, fearing for his safety, but it's also compromising my safety him staying with me.

Nobody seems to be helping, I've even tried Social Services, but they seem to expect me to continue to support my friend, when I have my own support needs.

My physical health is suffering along with my mental health, I've even considered overdosing as a means of escape because I'm so desperate :crying: