Ideas and pulse rates.

[Fire Fly]

Hey,
I'm just confused about some of the things I'm feeling. I know no one is able to tell me what's going on but my partner says that im having grandiose ideas but I'm pretty sure it's not but I was wandering what people think and if it is what do I do? Also just a question about pulse rates.

I feel scared writing it because people on the outside would know but basically I have been chosen to help team to investigate a big murder. They chose me because of my invincibility powers. As its a risky undercover work. I feel trapped and confined to the hospital unless i go out with someone. They know the person they have detained may have had connections and the people on the case aren't safe. It's down to me to help and protect them. It's hard being trapped and confined as I can't do what I'm chosen for.

I'm scared. The staff keep trying to make take sleeping pills as they say I've been doing a lot and not sleeping when I don't really need sleep. Today I feel so run down and Sick and can't keep anything down. But normally during the weeks and stuff I'm getting to the point where I was when I get sectioned. I don't think it Wil get there but usually I have energy. I don't get what's going on with me.

On top of things a while ago the consultant thought they were poisoning me because my heart rate was tacardia and real high at one point it was 130bpm but I didn't beleive it despite using two machines. So they've beentaking my pulse a lot but it's going up and down with no real pattern and I'm not sure what's going on. It's hardly below 100bpm what does that mean?

Is this what they call grandiose? And what's bad pulse rates? Thank you guys for reading xxx

[tiptoes]

It is not uncommon for you to feel like you don't need sleep when your mood is elevated and if you have been existing on little sleep for some time it could be why you are feeling run down. Although you feel like you have had sufficient sleep you probably aren't getting sufficient for your body to sustain itself longer term. I know how infuriating it is when people are telling you you need more sleep when you are in an elevated state but I think it would be a good idea to try and cooperate with the staff and try and get some better sleep even if that means taking sleeping pills.

In my humble opinion the ideas about being part of a covert undercover operation does sound quite grandiose. Do you have any evidence for these beliefs? They sound quite troubling for you, it's not quite the same but I get thoughts where I feel like I am needed somewhere but don't know where. I know how distressing it can be to feel like you can have a use somewhere but can't get to where you need to be. Do you feel safe talking to any of the staff about these thoughts and beliefs?

With regards to the pulse rate, I don't know whether it is connected by my pulse rate often increases when my mood is elevated. I usually put it down to the increased activity and agitation, my pulse sometimes increases when I am run down also. It is good they seem to be keeping an eye on it. If it is something you are concerned about could you see a general doctor about it?

[when.will.it.end]

In regards to your pulse, mine is naturally tachycardic as well (around 120) and as far as I can tell if your ECGs are fine then it's not an issue. Or at least no doctor I've come in contact with seems to think so for me. But of course I'm not a doctor! If it's being investigated then try not to worry too much. I think it can be an indicator of various things but on its own its nothing too serious.

[youonlyliveonce]

Hun tAlking to u for last few days you have said u were fine etc n didn't need hospital,..but this thread is very concerning ur going to need to work with them...from what u have said they r pretty pants...what do stu n ur dad think they shud b doing to help...how wud u keep urself safe if u came home I don't want to b harsh n I dint want u in hospital but honestly if I or anyone on here was saying these things what would you say....

Iv set u an aim get urself on the road to recovery n I'll cum down n see u both...
If u want to talk bout discharge don't push it just feel the waters so they dint section u come to some middle ground

Love u lots like jelly tots

Massive hugs

[Fire Fly]

Thank you all for replying.

Do you feel safe talking to any of the staff about these thoughts and beliefs?

I did manage to speak to a ember of staff about it. well I didn't speak but wrote it down and she said it seemed like there was nothing she could say to change my my mind. I don't know.

What I have been told is a normal pulse rate is anywhere between 40-80 bpm depending on your age and health. Your best bet on that would be to ask a doctor. I know mine usually goes up if I have not been eating well, get anxious, etc.

Quite possibly! I think when I get out of hospital, I will ask my GP to get some checks done because my mum died of either a heart attack or heart failure because of her medication of Lupus and stuff. So I'm weary of my heart.

Hun tAlking to u for last few days you have said u were fine etc n didn't need hospital,..but this thread is very concerning ur going to need to work with them...from what u have said they r pretty pants...

Iv set u an aim get urself on the road to recovery n I'll cum down n see u both...
If u want to talk bout discharge don't push it just feel the waters so they dint section u come to some middle ground

Love u lots like jelly tots

Massive hugs

Thank you lovely,
I saw the doctor yesterday and she basically said I had no choice other than to change to Olanzapine. - which I'm shitting bricks about. But the thing is she never wrote it up on my charts yesterday or today so I've asked that if nothing is being done whether I can be discharged tomorrow. She did re-increase my diazepam to three times a day to keep calmer. But she did say which i don't really remember but my partner said she said she couldn't discharge me the state I was in but if there not really doing anything here then I want discharge right?

I don't know whats happening but being in hospital is frustrating. its been ages now and I don't know. I feel like I'm going in circles... one minute they said hey lets try lithium then they say olanzapine as it does antipsychotic and mood stabilising effects... I don't know. I want home. I hate coming home and then having to come back to hospital. I spent my birthday in here and the hospital has ruint my christmas as well (and this is meant to be my favourite part of the year.)

I still think I need to do things and still feel like I need go and do this missions. it was so strong today to hope onto a train and head to where they need me. but i didn't.
surely they have no reason to re-section me! with resectioning do they have to go through the whole MHA thing again?