OCD has gone to hell.

[Emmabob.]

I've been diagnosed with OCD when I was under camhs, recently it appears to have come back into full force surrounding doors. I'm checking the door at least 6 times before I go to bed then I'm laid in bed anxious as hell over whether its actually locked or not usually resulting in me asking the bf to go check to make sure it is locked. whenever I go out, I check it 6 times too, if I'm calling into town on my own, 9 times out of 10, I'll end up walking half way to town then the anxiety gets too much and I'll go back and check the door again, the only time I don't "have" to double check the door once I've left is when I'm on my way to work. I'm like it if I'm with the bf, I don't fully trust him to have locked the door & he kinda gets annoyed with me constantly checking it.

I'm just a bag of nerves at the moment because of the anxiety and I don't know what to do with myself.

I don't know if by any chance its related at all but the only thing which has changed is the guy who was living in the flat with us has moved out.

[tiptoes]

Change can play havoc with my mental health (even positive changes) so it is possible.

Did CAMHs give you any advice or help to deal with your OCD that you could draw on now?

I don't know whether this would help you or not but at work I have something I need to turn off before leaving and it often becomes second nature that I turn it off but nearly always wake up in the middle of the night thinking I haven't turned it off (I don't use it daily) and question whether I am remembering turning it off today or another day. So I try to change the way I turn it off. Like think of different ways to say "i've turned it off" to myself and to my colleagues so i have different memories. Could you make a habit of saying to your boyfriend I have just checked the door it is locked it is definitely locked. etc.

Do you have any professionals to talk to this about?

[Emmabob.]

I did CBT with camhs which seemed to help at the time but doesn't seem to do much *now* but i'm not sure if its because I was doing it with a professional at the time & now i'm not or what. the bf usually spends about 10 minutes tryiing to convince me that the door is locked but theres a tiny part of me which isnt taking it as an answer. I have no professional support due to moving area & not really having many issues with my MH recently.