No beds - scared

[Nayy]

Hi,

I need a bit of support right now. I've been in hospital since beginning of September. I'm now on a sec 3 :(

They tried to get me home towards the end of my sec 2, but I was still to much of a danger to myself. Took another od, self harmed and still wasn't eating.

Once on sec 3 they decided to try and do a bit more and got the consultant psychologist involved, and the dietian came up with more of a plan. But sadly I couldn't stay on that ward, as it was assessment so moved to treatment ward. The ward I moved to was one I have had issues with and complained about it.
My treatment plan was not correctly communicated, the new psych reg and ward dr wrote out everything that I needed and put it up in nurses office. This doesn't seem to have been followed.
Fortijuis had been ordered but had been waiting 6weeks.
Repeatedly almost given me wrong dose of meds till I correct them. I am self catering effectively on the ward, but could only go to shops when someone could escort me. But they were always were short staffed and I was always put to back for various reasons.
Sunday early hours, patient smashed ward door in. Wasn't fixed I realised I could get out, door wasn't attended so at about 9 I made a dash for it. Head was all over the place took staggered od, went shopping and met friends. Friend dragged me back to ward. They had given away my bed. Found another one on same ward as that patient had just gone to A&e. Staff realised I wasn't right sent me to A&e, had a fight for right to choose medical treatment, they gave me 4mg IM loraz to no effect. In the end I ended up intubated on ITU for 2days!
Moved to general medical ward and have been waiting for a psych bed since.
Ed still bad. Collapsed last night, dr said everything was fine.

Just sooo stressed! I don't want to go back to that ward nor do I want to stay here!

[stumpy]

Hi just to let you know that we're here, sounds like your going through a difficult time right now, you said "The ward I moved to was one I have had issues with and complained about" was this a formal complaint? if so maybe refreshing their memory about this would help, if not maybe request a visit from an independent advocate to help you write a formal complaint about this ward would be a starting point :-)

Maybe an advocate could help ensure that any ward your placed on follow the instructions set out by, the consultant psychologist and dietician too.

Repeatedly almost giving you the wrong dose of meds until you correct them, sounds terrible, is there no way a medication chart with the correct meds and dosages can be issued to avoid future mistakes?

Waiting 6 weeks for Fortijuis is out of order, it sounds to me like this is a very badly run hospital, Fortijuis is usually readily available in every hospital I've ever been to.

I don't know what part of the country your in but there is this as set out in the NHS Constitution, "you may have a choice of a number of hospitals. You might want to choose a hospital that has better results for your treatment than others"

http://www.nhs.uk/choiceintheNHS/Rightsandpledges/NHSConstitution/Pages/Overview.aspx

I really hope your well enough to be able to go home soon, fingers crossed, the quicker they follow your treatment plan properly, the quicker you can be out of there :-) ((hugs))

[Nayy]

Thank you.

I'm in london (Islington).

It was not a formal complaint though I still have a photo of the letter the ward manager was given. I may have to follow that up further.
With regards to my meds they did have an accurate chart in front of them because I have literally had to point it out to them. The senior nurse in question just goes oh oh I thought it was one tablet as someone else here is just on one! Right so all patients are on the same!! Or I have to go and remind them i was due meds!

They have been able to get hold of fortisips and ensures but I hate them soo much because they are like dairy, so dr suggested the fortijuis. Dietian was appalled that they hadn't got them when I last saw her 2weeks ago, and took it to director of nursing. Still nothing has happened.

Sadly because I am on section I have no choice of where I go! My dad is putting in several calls and complaints it now just seems a waiting game.
Liaison came to see me earlier, and said they hope to get me back to one of the wards in the hospital I was in before, as there are ward rounds this morning so hopefully discharges!

It is soo stressfull, I just want to know what is going on. Parents are coming in to see me later hopefully with some news

[Wonderland.]

No words but love <3

I hope something is sorted out for you soon.

[Nayy]

I have a bed! An nhs one in same trust but different hospital. I think quite a lot of pressure was being swung around for me to get off general medical and not back to Highgate.
My dad had a phone call as I was in transfer from the Highgate consultant, and apparently my "escapade" has set off a serious incident report thing about locked doors and windows. Was also very apologetic, and is sad not to be my consultant anymore, and that he was going to be working on getting all the different people involved in my care together for an mdt. Hopefully that will all be handed over, in the email he is writing to new drs.

[stumpy]

Am glad you finally got a bed, not sure if this hospital is any better as I'm not familiar with London, but I certainly hope so, I hope everything is handed over correctly, and that they are more efficient and get your medication correct without you needing to ask :-)

Keep us updated on how your doing, I hope your doing better since the transfer :-)

[Nayy]

Since the transfer I have been on 1:1. Started to have certain items confiscated again. Most of the staff seem better, quicker at seeing if I'm distressed. Just don't get on well with bank staff, I think that is going to be a continual problem for me.
When I was seen in wardround no formal handover had been given, they just had what was on rio. I may be seen on Thursday again.
Luckily my ip psychologist is staying the same, as he is lead psychologist for the trust. I'm seeing him tomorrow and I'm glad as I feel I have a lot to talk about!
Haven't spoken to my cc, things feel very tense, he is being invited to ward round on Monday!
Managing to keep fluids up! And eating a little

[stumpy]

Well it sounds like things are progressing, and you sound a little better, it's good to hear your keeping your fluids up & eating a little, I hope you can eventually solve things with the bank staff, but at least things do seem to be getting a tad better :-)

[Nayy]

Thought I would make an update as I'm struggling a lot!!
Have remained on 1:1 while I have been here, no talk of me coming off it yet. Had everything bar what I was wearing confiscated. Have to swap clothes etc. but now I'm starting to get a little collection of items back, mainly stuff that needs washing, they don't seem to bothered about that. Can only have headphones during the day if I'm not distressed. But I'm soooo ocd with them as a barrier to noise, and it's noisy here at night :( they have upped my meds to try to help me sleep.
I'm banned from drinks cans but managed to get one and had a s/h episode. Then ended up in A&e as I swallowed something.
Food has been hard, but feel I've been eating to get out plus I think meds have increased my appetite. Still having random collapses. Two today, 1st just after having eaten some lunch! 2nd one was walking up corridor stupid 1:1 stood there and yelled that I had thrown my self on the floor and needed assistance. Obs all normal. They asked the dr to come who never did!
I've only ever seen them in ward round on Monday they aren't keeping on top of my blood tests etc. only possitive my psychologist is great!
Haven't seen cc in forever but he coming Monday. I'm worried, he now knows who he is going to be handing me over to on the community team.
So all in all... Not great and I'm scared I will be in hospital for Christmas!

[Nayy]

Really struggling. Don't know/think my consultant gets me. Says we have to change these "acting out" behaviours I don't see it as that and hate those words.
On 1:1 for 3rd week running, I haven't done anything this last week to deserve this. I really thought I would be getting off!
Just really could use some support right now

[Steel Maiden]

I advise you to make a complaint about your consultant's terminology.

[youonlyliveonce]

How are you 'acting out' can you try and express your distress in different ways... They obv feel for your safety or others that you need it... They opulent do it for the sake of it Hun work with them

[Nayy]

Thanks! I might make a note to my psychologist and cc (he was in the meeting) about the terminology used. I think she used as a way of describing my self harm and suicidality. But it's just a horrible phrase.

I really am trying to work with them. Just struggling to give them what control I have left. Big meeting next Monday is being held, with ward consultant, ward doctors, nurse from ward, cc, new cc who is taking over, psychologist and who ever comes from the ed team! So scary, it's all supposed to be about where I go and do after I have left this acute ward. Psychologist mentioned something called the crossroads?! But he said he had to do some research on it, as it was mentioned in passing by a member of the team. And the cassell has been brought up again.

[stumpy]

Well the Cassel is better suited from what I can see, http://www.wlmht.nhs.uk/cs/cassel-hospital-services/

The Crossroads seem to be more geared towards older people, from an initial glance at their website, crossroadscarecnl.org/ , that now redirects to, http://novus-homeshare.org.uk

however on their website there is a link to a blog that does indicate that they do also cater for younger people, but it's less specialised from what I can see, http://novushomeshare.wordpress.com/2014/10/29/homeshare-scheme-to-revolutionise-the-lives-of-young-and-old/

I'm hoping these are the correct places their looking at, just to give you a better idea of where/what their looking at :-)

I also found this that you could show them, but I'm not sure if you qualify, or if they'd be happy with it as an option, http://www.onehousinggroup.co.uk/one-support but just thought it might be worth a look :-)

I hope they manage to get you out of there soon & sort something out so your not having to be in the Hospital over Christmas, fingers crossed for you :-)

[Nayy]

Quick update!

Still on 1:1 for 4th week running! But get 2hrs off a day 8-10am so can wake up and get ready in my own time. Suppose it's going to be gradual.
Looks like I'm going to be here for Xmas though :(

[stumpy]

Oh,. gutted, well maybe at Christmas you won't be on 1:1, I can think of worse places to be, at least you'll be safe, not much fun though, maybe you could have a mini christmas celebration when you do get out of hospital :-)

[x-Silvermist-x]

I was just wondering are you on a section? I know when I was referred to the Cassel they only accepted voluntary/informal patients.

How are you today? How did you find being off 1:1 for a couple of hours?

x

[Nayy]

Yeah still on section 3 :( not being a very good patient in terms of compliance. But I am trying to mix more with other patients.
The time off 1:1 is hard as I think I choose the wrong time, 8-10am as staff start changing over at 7.30 you can hear them greating each other etc. my 1:1 for the day tries to spark up conversation about how I've slept etc when I'm still in bed. Then I have trouble getting them away from the door. So I spend my 2hrs sleeping!! One of the nurses and I are thinking of changing it 10-12 so I might be awake and get used to being alone.

On another note (this might not be the right thread) has anyone suffered with unexplained collapses that doctors have put down to anxiety when you aren't anxious or anything?!