Can't get the help I need from the professionals-Budget cuts etc! :(

[ajrocks]

Okay i'll try to keep this as short as possible to explain if i can.
Basically I have Bipolar but its mostly under control unless I have a trigger-last sept I had a trigger that sent me straight back to my past and I fell straight into a BP low where I was stuck for at least 6 months,I was desperate,didn't care about myself,had to be signed off work etc etc.

I got referred back to the adult mental health services in my area,they assessed me then put me on a list for anxiety management,psychology-one to one counselling,group therapy and poss CBT.
So the first thing that came to top of list pretty quick was anxiety management,i tried i saw her for 6 sessions,I learnt one technique that has helped-apart from that it wasn't helpful.

I then got a call about group therapy-I explained that I would find that too difficult due to adhd probs and also because i personally know it would be too much for me to listen to other people's stories as well as my own in that sort've situation,I stressed that I really just need one to one counselling. (having been in and out of the services since the age of 11 I think that I know what I need by now-I need to talk about my past with a trained individual which I have been avoiding for a long time but with my friends encouraging me i'm finally at a place I know I must talk.
I explained this to the lady she said that was fine and that they would keep me on the list for a psychologist.

I waited and waited....
In the meantime I got to some very desperate places,my G.P was helpless but doing her best my friends the same it was really bad :(

This year a friend found me a number for MIND and also the R**e Crisis Centre.
I have been going to MIND for about 2 months whilst I was waiting on list for other services.
I have tried and its not working either because its coping skills and how to deal with my triggers etc,its just not doing anything and I know now why that is and its cause I'm doing it the wrong way round! plus not to sound bad but I have already done all this,I know what triggers me,I know what i'm supposed to do I get it but sometimes I just can't put it into place.

I feel like theirs nothing else they can tell me at this point to manage myself.

I contacted R**e crisis-that was the hardest thing I ever had to do but I did about a month ago,now i'm on a year long waiting list for them :( I contacted all the other centres like them that my friend kindly printed off and I was told everything from you're out of our area,to yes in a years time,to we can't see you as we only deal with 1 specific thing.

In amongst all that I rang adult services up and i'm sorry to swear but they ****ed up big style and had discharged me off their list by accident!!! I was so upset its actually made me a lot worse lately because of all these professionals.

The last thing I tried was to contact HCC counselling service (i work in a school) but the lady said i'm not telling you to go away (erm yes!) but we aren't equipped to deal with you and suggested MIND!.

So basically i'm just so lost and I feel like all the services that can get to me right now can't deal with me because i'm too complex and the ones i really need that can help me I can't see for another year or have cocked up and taken me off the list I just can't take much more of dealing with these people really. :(

Its so ironic as well cause when I was a child I basically had the services on tap and I hated and didn't want them but now i'm an adult and have finally got to a point i know I need to talk about things properly because of stupid budget cuts i'm on my own and at the moment i'm rapid cycling and i really feel that this lot have aided in triggering that how typical!

any suggestions welcome?
sorry its so long! x
p.s i know their are phone lines but i've also tried those before.I literally feel like i've exhausted my options and my dr doesn't want to up my meds at the moment for fear of making things worse :( x

[Ballerina123]

Personally I would make a complaint about being discharged from the adult team accidently because that is poor care and something they need to learn from through a complaint and investigation. You also may get treatment sooner.

Have there been any changes to your meds? Could you request a meds review. Bipolar tends to react well to meds more so than therapy.

You could also try self help books.

What is it about the current help you have had that isn't helping? What do you think will help?

[ajrocks]

Hiya Kate thanks for your reply- I am thinking of writing a complaint I just don't feel strong enough at the moment,just so drained with it all you know :(

Since I contacted them they have said they have sort've changed hands and I have to contact a different service instead! (so pissed off!) the other service I;ve rang and spoken to them they promised me they'll get back to me but they never do! its been weeks of ringing speaking to someone,them saying thats wrong we'll take your case to a meeting and ring you back-they forget so i ring again but everytime i do i have to leave a message with the receptionist and it goes round in a circle-perhaps i'm supposed to lose the plot with them,maybe thats the only way someone will pay attention!

its so upsetting.
no,no med change though i have been to the G.P last week to ask and thats what she said :( i didn't react well in the past to an antidepressant it tipped me into a high so shes really cautious now i suppose :(

I don't know the current help just doesn't seem to do anything as was same with the anxiety management-i don't think i was anxious thats not the problem.
The problem is my past and the things that happened and that I need to talk about and have normal counselling and not CBT,anxiety management etc etc but noone seems to listen to me.

It just all seems to be about throwing all this other stuff at me to see if that works when really they could've saved themselves and me a lot of money and bother and just given me the counselling that I asked for in the first place.
so frustrated :(
thanks for reading and replying :)
I will have a look at some self help books as well thanks

[darkangel666]

well im so sorry your going through this i know it may seem like you have tried everything maybe just go on to this and say your feelings i know that it can be hard well at least i find it hard any way but it does help when you do but if you dong feel comfortable doing that just write your feelings down on a piece of paper or even start a daily diary which you.could right down how you feel that day good or bad what happened that day just remember write the good things to so maybe when you have a bad period you can look back and see that its not all bad im sorry that i cant offer that much help but i hope things are getting better for you

[ajrocks]

Hiya darkangel thankyou for that,actually one of the teachers I work with suggested that so i got a notebook the very next day and have started to write down my thoughts :)
it has helped a little bit.i just wish the place i keep having to ring will sort themselves out :(
thankyou for your support :)