How do I stop obsessing?

[eth1017]

I met this girls while ago, and she is the single greatest person I've ever met. I mean she's my 10/10 girl, and I really liked her and fell in love a while ago, but moved on cuz I didn't think she liked me. It turns out she did like me but moved on cuz I didn't make a move, and even tho she doesn't like me anymore, I'm back to obsessing over her and I can't stop. It's like, as soon as she texts me I HAVE to answer even if I'm busy, and she's always the first person I text every day, and I listen to music that she likes, watch movies she likes, do stuff she likes doing, etc. It's kind of serious but I just have a problem with this, with a lot of girls. This is one is very very serious tho, any ideas on how to stop this?

[Charmed]

Hi there, it's clear that you really care about this girl and it's affecting your life quite a lot. It is normal for the girl you like to become the only thing you think about for a while, and it can often seem like it's taking over your life. This is normal behaviour, and the brain can latch onto something which makes you happy.

But it does sound as though, you are worried over how serious this is becoming. You may have already done this, but could you start by trying to lower the contact with her? Maybe force yourself to do something, or speak to someone else before you reply to her in the morning. Even though you may have a strong urge to keep in contact with her, try and find something else which you can do to delay your reply.

Could you also find other music/movies etc. that you enjoy but perhaps you dont't? Maybe finding someway in which you differ, and watching things she doesn't necessarily like will help you distance yourself from her a little. It's normal for you both not to like the same things, and that won't affect how you both feel for each other, but may help lessen your obsession.

Alternatively, if you feel as though this is getting out of control, have you thought about telling someone? I realise this could be a scary thought, and may not be what you want to do, but others can help you in real life, especially help distract you from her.

Take care.