DesolateNight
13-08-2014, 12:52 PM
Well, my *suspected* OCD has been kicking the living heavens out of me for the past three years, and it's finally so bad now that i can barely function. For the past two and a half months i have been sleeping on a desk in my room because i cannot touch my bed. It would take less time to point out the things in my house that i can touch than it would to point out what i couldn't. One would take about three minutes while the latter would take numerous hours. Last night, my mother came to me to order me to sleep in my bed- to which i said i couldn't. She got angry and we discussed/quietly argued about it for a while. Coming to the end of the discussion, she seems to be considering putting me somewhere to help me *if you know what i me*. She says that if she were too take me too see someone , they would want to institutionalize me. At this point, i don't know what to do. I can't stand to be in this house for very much longer, but i don't want to be sent away to some place like that. *choked sigh* I can't hold up for much longer now. Most days i can barely eat because i'm too disturbed by my surroundings and my own body. I'm always exhausted and i am isolated from everyone outside my house(and those in the house are driven so insane by my quirks and "rituals" that they basically despise me) *shakes head* um, i don't know...