Parents' Decision

[SpeakLouder]

I finally spoke to my parents about my trichotillomania and asked if they would book me a doctor's appointment. I am old enough to go alone, but I don't really want to without my parents being okay with it. They said alright but gave me a day to think about it and decide if I really wanted to. The next day, I said I did and they said, "Why can't you just try harder to stop pulling your hair out?" But I've been trying hard for years. It's really not as easy as they think. They said I don't need help because I can stop it by myself.
Now I don't particularly want to have to get help but I think I need it because whenever I look in the mirror and see what I have done to myself, I feel so ugly and I don't want to go bald or anything like that.
I appreciate their 'faith' in me but I think it is actually that they are ashamed of me :S So I don't know really know what to do.
One point I should make is that my parents only know about me pulling my eyebrows and eyelashes out. They don't know about my head.
Does anyone have any advice on what I should do? Thanks!

[mikey]

It sounds like your parents don't quite understand what you're struggling with. Hence why they are saying 'just stop', when it's not as simple as that. Perhaps you could tell them a bit more about how much of a struggle it is to 'just stop'. Or you could show them what you wrote, or perhaps find a website which explains what trichotillomania is. However, like you said, this is really your decision. Although of course it's fantastic if you do have your parents' support, even if you don't I still think you should go and see your GP. I also don't think they are ashamed of you. More that they don't understand and don't quite know what to say and how to approach this.

[roiben]

As someone who has this (along with dermatillomania of the scalp), I know it is not as easy as just stop.

I catch myself at it all the time, having started without even thinking as it is ingrained and it can take things like CBT or mindfullness and other such therapies to help change the habit. My point being, there is help out there and by all means, go and get it. If you still want the help, can you not put in the request yourself?

I would also suggest directing your parents to more information on the condition so that they can see it is not as easy as just stopping and takes more support.

Ultimately, it is your choice - but do not let your parents apparent lack of understanding (and possible denial) put you of getting the help you deserve.

Roiben x

[PinQ]

I'm really sorry that your parents feel that way but I agree with what the others have already said, you should still go ahead and get help. If you've decided you're ready to get help you should go with that. It would have been nice to have your parents with you when talking to the GP but I think you should still try and go. Maybe once they understand more and you begin to get help, they will see that you are not purposely doing it and start to support you more.

[MrsCoulter]

I am sorry your parents seem to think this isn't a problem for you. My mum said I should just 'stop' cutting so I know where you are coming from.

With regards to getting help, I think you need to do it with or without your parents blessing, because getting help is all about helping yourself and maybe in the long run, your GP could explain to your parents what trich. is?