City I live in is triggering?

[-Asphyxia-]

I know that sounds weird, but....I think it is.

I recently went to North Carolina for a week for a week long art course and got back to the city where I went to school/currently live in the Midwest US last night...It's a big drinking city. Big. Ridiculous, actually. While I was away, I hardly ever drank; I bought a bottle of wine at the beginning of the week and drank one glass each night before bed; I didn't get drunk until we had our going away party this past weekend. That was major for me, and I was/am really proud of myself for keeping it together while away.

I'm not sure if it was because I was working my a** off while away and was too tired to drink/party, or what....But now that I am back, I am sitting at home kind of bored and debating walking to a bar down the street.

The atmosphere was completely different in NC; I was out in the mountains and the nearest bar or liquor store was at least 20-30 min. away...I was with completely new people, totally focused on my art and work schedule (I got a scholarship to go but had to work while there to "pay" for it.)

Do I just need more focus? I wish I was a student again, lol. It's kind of depressing me that this city is such a trigger...Does it mean I have to move on or just keep myself busy and throw myself back into artwork? Am I answering my own question......? haha

Thoughts? Advice? Thanks.

[carjunky08]

That must be some city! Idk if i have anything good, but ill do my best. It sounds like ur pretty focused as it is. yea it is depressing that a place like tht could be such a trigger, course i cant really say much cuz its the same for me where i live.

The only thing i can suggest is somethin tht works for me. and that is try and keep busy, but so something that you like to do. if its artwork for you then great. i would just try and keep busy with something!

but thts me, idk if tht helped or not! take care and best wishes

[HarryMonk]

Boredom is the worst trigger EVER.

I like photography (not the smutty kind. Take photos of disused rail stations & sh it like that; thats my art.

Asphyxybaby dont give up. DO art instead. You know it makes sense

[HarryMonk]

btw your post made me chuckle. Esp wanting to be a student again??? LOL are you off your cake. Focus on your art you got the brains, dont just study draw a stick man & tell the world you went all Cheryl Cole: Because your worth it lol

[HarryMonk]

anyway i went out & about (which was a huge step for me... I had to sink 6pints before i had the courage.

Shock of all shocks... I blended in.

There was me waitin to get offered out in the car park

& we all went home intact

[HarryMonk]

Bizzare

[Coffeemate]

There's something amazing about starting afresh. . .new city, new friends, new life, new job, new course. . . . We go somewhere new and it's like being on holiday and so it's taking a break from all the stressors at home too.

But yeah, we get into habits at home. We walk down a street and see the bars we normally drink in, we call our friends who probably also drink. I think one of the hardest things about drink and drugs is that its not just about kicking the habit, it's about everything that goes with it like friends and a way of life.

I suppose the other side of the coin is that when you live in different place, you don't have some of the more supportive friends and the security and safety net that a familiar place can have.

But yeah, you aren't the first person I've met who's said that the place they live in is a trigger.

[HarryMonk]

Cool Coffee. Proper.

Not sure if its relevant but I was contemplatin "movin out" wholesale a few weeks back.

It was a rip cord scenario, I just had enough.

Wanted a new life new friends new supermarket ffs.

Lady warned me... Scary "dont try to escape from yourself, because it will follow you"

Freaked the life out of me. But she was right.

Movin house wont solve the problem...

Harry Monk xxxxxxxx

[-Asphyxia-]

There's something amazing about starting afresh. . .new city, new friends, new life, new job, new course. . . . We go somewhere new and it's like being on holiday and so it's taking a break from all the stressors at home too.

But yeah, we get into habits at home. We walk down a street and see the bars we normally drink in, we call our friends who probably also drink. I think one of the hardest things about drink and drugs is that its not just about kicking the habit, it's about everything that goes with it like friends and a way of life.

I suppose the other side of the coin is that when you live in different place, you don't have some of the more supportive friends and the security and safety net that a familiar place can have.

But yeah, you aren't the first person I've met who's said that the place they live in is a trigger.



Yeah, you're right. I initially went to the class thinking it'd be the beginning of a fresh start, but when I got back, things were/are the same....and it's kind of getting me down. Same friends (who drink a lot/do some drugs), same (sh*tty) job, little money, etc...

*shrug* It kind of sucks to be back; I did drink both nights this weekend and smoked last night...I don't plan on buying a drink until this next weekend. *crosses fingers* Smoking isn't really an issue, considering I hardly do it. Plus, it makes me lazy, then I feel guilty for sitting around.

Sometimes I wonder if I should just get a new group of friends.......They're not bad people, but they sure as hell like to party. :-/

[HarryMonk]

I'd be interested if anyone has moved town/friends for these/our/my sort of reasons & its been a runaway success.

Personally I reckon its just the guy in the back of my head windin me up.

More likely end up in a new place with a heap of new crap, bein the common denominator & all that...

xxx

[Coffeemate]

I'm just reading what I wrote and it comes across kind of negative. I didn't mean for it to.

I suppose what I should have said was that there's nothing wrong with wanting a fresh start and it's good that you want something different.

I've never been to the states but it seems like a similar story here; if you're young then your social life revolves around drinking. I think the older you get the easier it is to avoid the drinking parts, but if you live in a place with little else to offer you in terms of things to do then . . . . It's tough.

So maybe it would help to move to a city with more culture and things to offer a young person (massive assumption here! ;) ). And I think to a certain degree there does come a time where people do have to make a more concrete move from their old life to their new life and maybe a physical move can represent that.

I suppose what I was trying to say in my original post was that there's something seductive about a fresh start but there's more to it than that and I guess that unless you've looked at the other stuff going on, the reasons why you drink etc, it's just running away.

Wanting change is good, don't lose sight of it

~x~

[HarryMonk]

Coffee I dont think what you said was negative at all. In my own case I just think I would drag my baggage.

xxx