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Old 11-06-2007, 12:05 AM   #1
pixie*lyssie
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Adult - Am I strange

Okay so I'm 18 I'm a girl, and a virgin. But you don't know how much I want to have sex. I have never had a boyfriend and I really want to have sex. Like I want to know what it feels like and all that. I really really realllly want to lose my virginity. I dont care who it's (it would be better if we were together) but to I just want to lose it. I'm sorry. I just needed to let that out. Please reply. I feel alone in this. Thanks x



Someday I'll wish upon a star
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Where troubles melt like lemon drops
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Old 11-06-2007, 01:13 AM   #2
Mandimoo
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you're not strange, at 16 i was exactly the same.
i dared an exboyfriend to bed me. 'i bet you wouldn't do it' so he did. he then started turning up every week wanting more (bear in mind he shattered every kind of illusion i ever had about sex the first time, he was in my house less than 2mins i would say!)

then i finally give in and he doesnt have a condom, but i have the morning after pill (just in case), so we do it, the pill doesn't work, i end up, alone, 16 and pregnant. oh and i just happen to have depression too. i lost the baby, don't quite know if its a good or bad thing, but i dont think i was ready. he's happily engaged, he proposed the day after fertilising me.

it lead into obsession with sex, i swapped cutting for one night stands and sexual harm. i masturbated so much i could hardly walk. and yeah, i wasn't in a good place, i wasn't enjoying it and i started to 'cyber' with complete strangers.

it left in a wreck, a shell. i joined ryl and was attempting suicide and all sorts. i still have an unhealthy obsession with sex, but i got a hubby who controls me, tells me he still loves me if we just cuddle, and makes me feel beautiful.

its not worth it
wait for the right guy
you will meet him eventually. its not ever 3years after i lost my virginity, i been married for over a year and im so happy - still in honeymoon period lol!

i still see him, i used to think he was gorgeous, i chased him for a year before dating for a month, then 6months later he turns up on my doorstep. now i see him and his fianceť, i used to work with them both, she's so similar to me in some ways, it makes me feel sick. he's not skinny or muscular anymore, he's arrogant, cocky, gained weight, sleazy, and that hair i used to love...eugh it looks like he stuck his head in a vat of lard now.

makes my skin crawl.

it's not worth it.



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Old 11-06-2007, 02:13 AM   #3
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Personally i think its kinda nice you are 18 and stil a virgin and i DONT think there is anything wrong in that. I also dont think theres anything wrong in wanting to lose it. However be careful. There are alot of idiots out there. I would hate to think you were just picking anyone just to experience it.

Most peoples first time is a little hap hazard to say the least. Lots of fumbling and awkwardness, especially if you are both new to it.

My advice is DONT rush it. It will happen when it happens. You are perfectly normal. Dont let anyone tell you that you are not!

Take care
Matthew xxx



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Old 11-06-2007, 03:42 AM   #4
bleedingdragon
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Hey

Its really ok that your 18 and still a virgin, and hey i understand how you feel about wanting to have sex. You shouldnt really want to rush to loose your virginity, it should be something that you are fairly happy with and something that you wont regret, such as becoming pregnant. Please understand its not a race , and you need to think about yourself, please dont rush into any sexual encounters, without really thinking. And i hear you about not having a boyfriend, im not afraid to say i didnt have a serious girlfriend until i was in my late 20s .

please dont say you really dont care who you loose your virginity to, it should be someone you care about, and not someone you dont know or understand.

I understand you about feeling alone i too ws alone for a long time without a girlfriend, but im glad i waited until someone came along that i felt comfortable with.

take care keep talking and best wishes
Dave




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Old 11-06-2007, 07:29 AM   #5
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i rushed into sexual things, the guy turned out to be a bastard, using me. please dont rush into that, its not worth it...

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Old 11-06-2007, 11:23 AM   #6
pixie*lyssie
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You guys... you dont know how much you've all made me feel better. I have realised I guess that I probably just want to use sex for a self harm sorta thing. I was also having 'cyber' with a total stranger but he turned out to be a pig.
The thing is, also that I find strange is that I also want to have a baby. Not like just broody. I mean like I pretend to my family and friends that I hate crying baby's but I want to have a baby to love and to love me and rely on me and so I can care for him/her. And have him/her grow up and see them develop into a beautiful kind caring person. Oh I don't know.
And it's not just that I want sex so I get pregnant, it's both, I want sex and to feel what it feels like and explore and just do something with my time.



Someday I'll wish upon a star
and wake up
where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
away above the chimney tops
that's where you'll find me
http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1002&dateline=1227381  259


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Old 11-06-2007, 11:24 AM   #7
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I just want to feel sexy.



Someday I'll wish upon a star
and wake up
where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
away above the chimney tops
that's where you'll find me
http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1002&dateline=1227381  259


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Old 11-06-2007, 06:09 PM   #8
pixie*lyssie
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Feel like a disturbed freak!



Someday I'll wish upon a star
and wake up
where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
away above the chimney tops
that's where you'll find me
http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1002&dateline=1227381  259


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Old 11-06-2007, 06:43 PM   #9
chocostashchick
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oh honey i felt just like that too
i completely know how you feel
i was 15 and i totally rushed it and forced it and the guy was not worth it and it screwed me up so badly
i was just so focused on the sex bit that i forgot to care about who it was that i lost it to
be calm about it, and patient, and make sure that when it does happen you are ready and he is ready and that he is worth it
but you arent a freak, and i am sure you are sexy
sexy is so much more than a look or an image - it is how you feel inside
i hope you feel better about this and if you want to talk about it feel free to pm me any time
xxxooo



xxxooo


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Old 11-06-2007, 06:55 PM   #10
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I was 19 when I lost my virginity to a girl I'd been going out with for three months. It was the first time for both of us, and it made it so much more special. Before then, I'd been desperate to lose it and it frustrated me that so many people I knew were having sex and I wasn't.

Now, with hindsight, I see what a needless fuss I was making over something which really isn't that big a deal. When you've found the right person, and the time comes, you'll realise it was totally worth the wait. You're not strange for wanting to lose it though, everybody wants to lose it when they've got it. Believe me, it's not that big a deal!



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As if it made them feel alive"

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Old 11-06-2007, 07:35 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pot_Steve View Post

Now, with hindsight, I see what a needless fuss I was making over something which really isn't that big a deal. When you've found the right person, and the time comes, you'll realise it was totally worth the wait. You're not strange for wanting to lose it though, everybody wants to lose it when they've got it. Believe me, it's not that big a deal!
thats what i was going to say :)

dont just rush into it with anyone. youre not a freak and youre not unsexy just because you havent had sex.xx




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But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
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Old 11-06-2007, 07:40 PM   #12
pixie*lyssie
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You guys have made me feel so muxch better!



Someday I'll wish upon a star
and wake up
where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
away above the chimney tops
that's where you'll find me
http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1002&dateline=1227381  259


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Old 12-06-2007, 12:45 AM   #13
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Hey, I just wanted to say that I know it seems probably stupid to say on my behalf, but I WISH I was a virgin. God only knows when I lost my virginity, I was abused sexually for as long as I can remember. Sex and relationships have been a huge problem in my life. I went from one abusive man, into care, and began to get abused by another (a teacher). I lost three children to him, and I am not sure if I can ever even have children anymore. I was made a prostitute for months, to repay my debt to him whilst I kept these pregnancies a secret. They were so dangerous.

But this is the *more* relavent bit. I just rushed into a relationship with a guy I met on a dating website, and tried to get pregnant with him, however this was the second date into things. Well, my reason was I've been majorly screwed up and I know I need help, but what is his? :S He turned out to be a git, and I haven't seen him since we had an argument on dare I say it msn(!) Now I'm waiting to find out if I am pregnant again.

So, to sum up, I can understand what you think and feel, but don't rush chick. The best things come to those who wait.

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Old 12-06-2007, 01:08 AM   #14
Mandimoo
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i know about the crazy hormones and broodyness. I have a hormonal disorder called PCOS (google it), that means i may never have kids, also means that i have crazy hormones that make me extremely horny lol!

ann summers is your best friend. mand x



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Old 12-06-2007, 07:13 AM   #15
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When I was 17, I decided I was sick of not knowing whether I was a virgin (not sure whether I've repressed memories, but my hymen broke when I was 12). So, I had sex with a random guy. Should've made a break after, but I didn't and he raped me. So, the only experience of actual sex I have is with a guy who was an asswipe and now I don't want any guy touching me. It's not worth it.

In short, I don't think it's strange, but from what I've seen on this post, every one of us who rushed it regrets it. Don't make our mistake.



The trouble with killing yourself to punish someone is that at the end of the day, they're still alive and you're still dead.



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Old 12-06-2007, 09:39 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by alyssa.star View Post
The thing is, also that I find strange is that I also want to have a baby. Not like just broody. I mean like I pretend to my family and friends that I hate crying baby's but I want to have a baby to love and to love me and rely on me and so I can care for him/her. And have him/her grow up and see them develop into a beautiful kind caring person.
What's your family life like now? What are your parents like?

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Old 12-06-2007, 09:50 AM   #17
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Ok, I know I am new on here, but I hope you (Alyssa) read this post, I am 28, I lost my virginity at 14 years old because I thought that having sex with my boyfriends would keep them from cheating on me. LOL that didn't work. Anyway, the point is that I have slept with a lot of guys, now I am with my soulmate, and if I could take back every guy before him I would. I have problems now (sexual) that wouldn't be there if I had just waited for the right guy. He has also been with a lot of women, and believe me, it impacts our sexual relationship. If we could both go back in time, and be virgins we would. Trust me, it is worth waiting for the right guy!!!!! It makes a BIG difference!!!!!

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Old 12-06-2007, 11:26 AM   #18
pixie*lyssie
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You guys have made me feel a lot better and I know that is so oversaid but it's rather true.

Mand- *did google* I'm sorry yo have to go through this. and the ann summers comment made me laugh lol. although i did actually have a DREAM where I had a thing, thing thing. *cough* vibrator *AAAAHHHHEEMMMM*.

Ancalagon- My family is fine at the moment. It's just that throughout my life I've had many issues with my mother and sister and weve needed family therapy and stuff. Because my mum is so over protective. Dont get me wrong she's my little star. I just want a chance to feel needed by someone who's connected to me and someone who I can adore back.
Sounds wierd lol.

Dunno what else to say hehe. Thanks again guys. x x x *goes to let the cat it*



Someday I'll wish upon a star
and wake up
where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
away above the chimney tops
that's where you'll find me
http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1002&dateline=1227381  259


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Old 12-06-2007, 04:48 PM   #19
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i don't think being 18 and a virgin is a bad thing at all :) it means that your very mature because you have been waiting for the right person and im sure that 90% of people wish they had waited too.

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Old 12-06-2007, 05:17 PM   #20
Destinationzero
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I agree. Being 18 and a virgin is not bad. I am 18 and I lost my virginity to the most amazing guy in the world. The thing was though that I had to wade through a bunch of people I thought "loved me" but were only saying that because they wanted me in bed with them. I had all of the urges that you are talking about and I really never felt sexy because of the lack of actual sex. The thing is...being sexy is mental. If you feel that way you will be that way sex or no. Don't rush things just because you want to get it over with...that can be a mistake. You totally fine though being 18 and a virgin. Having sex is totally not a big deal and you're not missing all THAT much in my opinion.

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