I tend to open a word document and type and type until there's nothing left for me to say. Even if no-one sees it, it's out of my head for a while at least.
~Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly~
I removed myself from stressful situations. If my parents were yelling i would simply tell them the truth. "I love you and i understand your frusteration but i simply cannont allow you to put me in this sort of issue any more." i would take walks and bring nothing along with me. yoga, breathing excersizes where i imagined exhaling my bad thoughts and bringing in good ones. i visited friends, called them. called my therapist. drew with chalk pastels where i removed dark colors. it seemed to help because my brain couldnt even imagine drawing something triggering. reading writing. simply sitting in the sun. playing in the dirt. i just did a lot of "grounding" techniques that made me feel like i belonged somewhere and that was mostly outside. climbing trees felt good. laying in the grass. screaming somewhere where no one could here you. my favorite thing to do was to go on a "picnic" with my younger sister. we would just get ham samwiches and carrots or apples and just sit in the front yard and eat and laugh. sometimes we would take chalks and chalk on the black top on the road. and taking a bath. but you really have to be careful to remove the stuff that you may want to use. it takes a lot of self control.
i just really wanted to feel happy and i think me pushing myself to forgive all i was hurt by helped me. in the begining of me trying to get better i thought it would be like an epiphany of me going "duh" just be happy. i found out that i really had to work hard. and i did and now looking back at where i was and where i am now i could not imagine going back to that constant darkness.
I havn't self harmed for over a year now, and I was thinking about how I managed it and I realised it's basically because I got rid of the things that made me feel bad. I left school, broke up with my boyfriend and Im at Uni. I have no reason to anymore because the things that upset me have gone away. I'm happy now with my new life, I have nice friends and a wonderful boyfriend (Who's also self harmed in the past so he was very understanding when I told him I used to) and so on.
A good thing to do is to try to sort out what's making you feel the way you do, and try to tackle that problem so it won't hurt you anymore.
it's silly, but i color on myself. actually i've created some real masterpieces...=] grab a box of washable watercolor markers and away you go. henna is awesome too, and gets less odd looks, but marker is much cheaper and easier to wash off. and very satisfying. when you really want to si, sometimes angrily drawing lines with a red marker helps. it's the same motion, at least for me, and the same color...
i've also gotten into burning incense. i like patchouli, though a lot of people don't! you can light incense, or a candle, though i like incense because it burns out and gives you something realistic to focus on. you just watch it until it burns out, and by then i've usually calmed down a bit.
music helps, too, as does this website. sometimes just getting out and doing something--going for a run with your dog or a walk in the park, just OUT and away from anything sharp for awhile.
most importantly...i'm sure everyone's heard this but you can't stop for someone else, because it won't work, not if you're really in deep. i tried. from the time i was 8 until the time i was 17, i tried to stop for other people. it wasn't until i woke up and saw what i was doing to my life that i even got to one month. take a good long look at your life. where do you want to be in 5 years? 10? Cutting isn't going to help with that, and it's easier to stop today than it will be tomorrow.
I have had problems with self-injury for eight years now and I am proud to say that I am now 4 months free! The bracelets helped me. It felt good to wear them and know what they stand for.
i think mainly what has helped me is to stay positive if i got down i would look at positive stuff like inspirational quotes not watch trigging stuff just keep busy mainly i think what mostly helped me is to is the inspiration i got from the quotes and videos i watched
Sherlock: Oh, please. Killing me. That's so two years ago.
I have been SI free from 2 1/2 years ^_^, and here are some of my tricks, I hope to help.
I try to think logically, explain to myself very real reasons not to cut at that moment, for me it was so I wouldn't have to tell my BF that I did. Also, I found that I couldn't break promises when I made them, so I had my friends make me promise that I would tell them as soon as I did it, and if they couldn't get calls in the middle of the night, I would have to tell them within the day, I hate telling others, so this really helped deter me from SIing. I had one friend go as far as to tell me that if I SIed, he would SI as well, he had never done it before, but I cannot stand to see someone hurt, especially physically, so it scared me into not doing it for a good 3 months when I really needed it.
When you want to cut, you become illogical, it is all emotions, so if you can either switch your emotions away from yourself by making promises to others, or scaring yourself with someone elses pain, this will help take you away from the cravings. When you think logically, it switches you brain from one type of thinking to another, bringing you away from the cravings.
To fight this, I will repeat over and over again, "I AM strong, I CAN do this, I WILL do this" Not "I think I can", make them definite, it brings your thoughts back to positive, and doing logical things also helps. Do a puzzle, do some math problems, list off the things you need to do tomorrow, things that take your full attention take you to a logical place and pull you away from the urges. I especially like the puzzles, find one you enjoy and that you are good at, this way you get a sense of accomplishment when you finish it as well.
Always know, the human spirit is the hardest thing in the world to kill, you might not be able to feel it, but it is there, you can trust it, you can lean on it, it will not break, you are so much stronger than you think you are.
Hope I helped. If anyone wants to talk, or wants more explanation on this, feel free to PM me.
Yes it's true that I believe
I'm weaker than I used to be
I wear my heart out on my sleeve
And I forget the rest of me
Yes there's times I've been afraid
And there's no harm in that I pray
Cuz I'm more frightened everyday
Someone will take the hope I have away
Staying away from a particular place where you normally cut, helps for me. If I have a bad urge I stay away from my bedroom for awhile, even if it means camping out in the bathroom with a book :-P.
Do anything that distracts you, no matter how silly. Ive spent hours browsing through wikipedia.org, looking up the randomest things.
Set a goal and stick to it, it helps keeping that in mind. For instance say to yourself "Im going to go a week without SH". Then when you make that goal reward yourself (not by cutting!) and make another.
Setting goals has probably been the main thing that has kept me SI free.
Make sure you have a good support system as well.
I DID THIS!!!
It works...Im nearly 8 months free :]
Going to the gym or for a run helps too...
and I made a distractions box...that was full of fiddly keeps-your-fingers-and-brain-busy kinda things like beads and string and puzzles :P
EDIT:
I also used the butterfly method...
Drawing a buterfly over the place i normally cut in permanent marker...
The idea is that the butterfly represents someone special to them...and if you hurt it...you hurt them...
I find that when I feel like hurting myself, I text my girlfriend. The hardest thing to remember when you feel bad is that you're loved. It's the thing everyone forgets in the spur of the moment. But remember. You are loved. There is someone there who loves you and doesn't want you hurt. A parent or other family member, a friend, a boy/girlfriend, a spouse, a work friend. But there is always someone there for you. When I feel bad I find it helps to text or ring them and just talk. About anything. Get them to tell you that they love you and don't want you hurt, distract you from your thoughts, share a joke or a funny story, maybe. But always remember. You are loved.
That's what helped me make it to 20 days without a slip and still going.
EDIT:
I also used the butterfly method...
Drawing a buterfly over the place i normally cut in permanent marker...
The idea is that the butterfly represents someone special to them...and if you hurt it...you hurt them...
i'm not sure where i read this, it might've been on this site, but i don't know and i'm too lazy to look for it lol... it said something like: stare at your arm/leg/whatever you're thinking of cutting and imagine it's the arm/leg or whatever of someone you care about. when you cut, you're cutting their arm.
i've tried this before, and it does make it harder.
i also do breathing excersizes. like, sit down, close your eyes, and breath in for four seconds, hold for four seconds, out for four, and nothing for four. it calms me down, and it also works if i'm nervous.
I draw on my arm with a red felt-tip and as im doing it, it gives me time to think about what might have caused me to want to self-harm.
then if that doesn't work I ring or text a friend, it sometimes helps to chat things through x x
1. don't be afraid, to, well, brag about how long you've been clean. i guess. it's not a bad thing. you deserve a little pat on the back. don't be like, arrogant, or anything, but it gives other people hope, as well as yourself. i find that it's a positive reward. my AIM, MSN, and facebook statuses are set to 104 days atm, and they don't say what it's for. But it makes me happy to see that many days.
2. ask for help. call someone, anyone, even if it's just to chat to distract you. it doesn't seem like it, but you have a lot of weapons against self-injury. there's a lot of things you can do.
3. the butterfly project got me through this summer without cutting. i got funny looks and condescending comments ,and my reply was that there's worse things i could do to my arm than draw on it with ink, get over it. it's my body, and my recovery. no one can take that away from me.
4. rewards!! rewards are essential! treat yourself somehow. you deserve it.
5. support systems are also essential, and RYL is a good one, but start figuring out if you have friends or family who could help you out. I couldn't have done it without friends to spur me on and encourage me, nor could I have done it without RYL.
6. The first year, for most addictions, is trying. So don't be discouraged that the urges aren't going away. they will not, for a long long time. but it's still worth it!!
7. you are worth it! you deserve so much better than self-injury!
8. hot baths tend to be good rewards.
9. i use the internet a lot to distract myself during intense urges, but i try not to trigger myself as well.
10. there's always ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS someone who would rather have you talkto them, whine to them, complain to them, cry to them, whatever, than injure yourself. I repeat: ALWAYS. Pastors? Counselors? It is their job, literally, to love and encourage people. You are not surprising them, they've heard everything before. Utilize RYL chat. The people on there have saved my life.
11. Ditch being self-conscious because people think you're doing it for attention. You're not. I don't know a single therapist who's ever seen one attention case. 99.9 percent of the time, it is entirely NOT attention. That is a stigma made up by people looking for easy answers and are afraid of pain, especially expressing it. Their problem not yours. You are in touch with your emotions enough that you express it even through self injury.
It is a maladaptive coping mechanism, and it has helped you survive thus far.
12. Along with that, ditch shame. It has helped you survive, and now you don't need it, because you have so many other things. Do not be ashamed.
13. Write LOVE on your scars with marker. I don't know why, it helps.
14. I write bible verses that talk about hope and depression on my arms, like micah 7:8-9 and psalm 118:17-18.
.gif "sohappy")
