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Old 07-11-2013, 01:42 PM   #1
Terray
The price of death is life.
 
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Would you start off a relationship long distance?

We live 3440 miles apart.

I really, really like this guy. We've talked before and gone on a couple of dates, but I was just really overwhelmed in this last year between my head injury and court against my dad and raising my brother and sister etc etc etc. I didn't have time to really be with anyone (also think I needed to be single for what ended up being year). Now I've moved to the other side of the continent for graduate school.

Anyway, we've been talking daily (all day really) and skyping a few times a week (usually for a few hours each time). I really like him.
He's told me multiple times how much he likes me, how it feels like we're already together, how he wants this to turn into a relationship, he was looking at flights to come visit me blah blah blah

We'll be in the same place for a week in November, a month between Dec-Jan, 4 months over the summer. I get 2.5 weeks off in March (when he talked about coming out here if we work out). So it's not like we'd be long distance 365 days a year, but it still would be long distance for a good chunk of the year.

We'll be living in the same place again in a year and a half.

I do really like him, but that is just such a distance to start off a relationship idk




Sometimes, you have to try more than once.

Alice came to a fork in the road
"Which road do I take?" she asked.
"Where do you want to go?" responded the Cheshire cat.
"I don't know," Alice answered.
"Then," said the cat, "It doesn't matter."


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Old 08-11-2013, 12:49 PM   #2
Just a girl, Interrupted.
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It depends if you think you could handle the distance mentally.
Personally, I would have to trust the person 100% before I would consider it. It sounds like you are really keen on this guy and want to make it work, if you really want something you can make it happen

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Old 21-11-2013, 07:23 PM   #3
High_Voltage
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it depends. ive had long distant relationships before they dont bug me too much but it depends on the people involved and if you and take being in a relationship like that as sometimes others cant






♪"Tragic but I stand alone
With an empty chest it's a dial tone"♪



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Old 22-11-2013, 12:05 AM   #4
Aardbei
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I was in a long distance relationship with my first boyfriend for around 4 years (and then lived in the same city for 3) and I've been in a long distance relationship with my current boyfriend for around a year (but lived in the same city for a year before that). It's hard but if you want to make it work, you will. In some ways starting off as long distance is easier, because then when you finally are able to be together without all of those miles between you, you appreciate it so much more.

My personal belief is that you should try everything once and if it's worth the effort, you'll make it work. Better to try and fail instead of not trying at all and always wondering what could have been :)





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Old 22-11-2013, 08:41 PM   #5
little-elf
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I think it's worth a shot if you can both completely trust each other and can manage your expectations, I've been working in Afghanistan for the last 2 and a bit years and after starting to work here I hit it off with an old friend at home, as I only get a few weeks every few months at home but because we knew it wouldn't be forever we decided to give it a "trial run" to see how it went. That was 18 months ago, and we're going strong, and I should be back home for good soon. That's not to say there were no difficulties, starting a relationship this way has it's own unique set of challenges including (as I found out when I had to spend 5 months at home for physiotherapy) getting used to managing your time together when you're home on a longer term basis. It can be very hard, but I know I'll never regret taking the chance! I hope whichever you decide you find happiness =)



In The Wake Of All The Terror And The Hell, I Am Constantly Reminded All The Crosses That I Bear.
You want to see me burn, I am living fire. You will know me by the scars I bear.
See the pain in my eyes See the scars deep inside My God, I'm down in this hole again.
Everyone's asking questions No place is safe I'll forfeit resurrection To escape the pain I hate my life.
Eye'm sorry eye'm ugly, eye'm failing eye'm angry, eye'm fuct up eye'm different

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Old 22-11-2013, 10:20 PM   #6
small light
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I was in a long distance relationship for 3 years, I'm now happily married to him :) it was very difficult, I won't lie, but we discovered how to make it work. One thing was that we contacted each other in some way every day (trying to phone at least every other day - you could always Skype) and be real about how we were doing. I went into a unit while we were still long distance and was in there 6 months - again very difficult - but still contact and honesty really helped. After 3 years he moved to where I live, a year later we were married..



F r e d d i e

I am raw meat in a slaughter house, packaged according to what you are hungry for . . .


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Old 23-11-2013, 05:36 PM   #7
Terray
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Thank you for all of the opinions! We've still been talking just as much in the time since I made this post. I'm flying home in three days. We've got a hotel to stay at. I think we need to wait to make anything official until we've hung out again next week, but that really seems to be the way it's going.

I think I'll forever regret not giving this a chance if I don't try, so might as well. The replies from all of you made me hopeful that it can work. Maybe it won't, but it might so I might as well try :)




Sometimes, you have to try more than once.

Alice came to a fork in the road
"Which road do I take?" she asked.
"Where do you want to go?" responded the Cheshire cat.
"I don't know," Alice answered.
"Then," said the cat, "It doesn't matter."


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Old 23-11-2013, 07:07 PM   #8
little-elf
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Trying and failing can hurt, but often less than the "what if's" that we plague ourselves after, while you're at home agree to how you both would like things to be - maybe having a virtual date night once a week - what ever works for you, I sincerely hope things work out for you both :)



In The Wake Of All The Terror And The Hell, I Am Constantly Reminded All The Crosses That I Bear.
You want to see me burn, I am living fire. You will know me by the scars I bear.
See the pain in my eyes See the scars deep inside My God, I'm down in this hole again.
Everyone's asking questions No place is safe I'll forfeit resurrection To escape the pain I hate my life.
Eye'm sorry eye'm ugly, eye'm failing eye'm angry, eye'm fuct up eye'm different

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Old 04-12-2013, 01:10 AM   #9
Terray
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We decided to make it official when I was back over the thanksgiving break. He's now my boyfriend :)




Sometimes, you have to try more than once.

Alice came to a fork in the road
"Which road do I take?" she asked.
"Where do you want to go?" responded the Cheshire cat.
"I don't know," Alice answered.
"Then," said the cat, "It doesn't matter."


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Old 04-12-2013, 10:48 PM   #10
small light
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Awww lovely :) I hope you enjoy your relationship!



F r e d d i e

I am raw meat in a slaughter house, packaged according to what you are hungry for . . .


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