Beyond repair.

[chinahorse]

Thanks tiptoes. That makes a lot of sense.

I'll just ask mum to open the post when she's feeding bertie and let me know if there's an apoint ment .

I feel really horrible today. And I don't know why. Edgy and anxious and irritable. And I cant shift the feeling.

[one_step_closer]

That sounds like a good plan.

Is it mostly physical stuff you're feeling today or is there emotional stuff behind the feelings that you are aware of? Do you have any soothing activities or could you do something like go for a walk so that your body feels like it's just exercising instead of being anxious etc?

[chinahorse]

Suppose there's anxiety behind tomorrow.

I do need to go to town but I'm meant to be going with someone but she said probably later this afternoon. Might go soon by myself as I think getting out the house would help.

[one_step_closer]

Are there specific things you're anxious about that maybe we could try to help you feel less anxious about?

Getting out of the house does sound like a good idea, would you maybe be able to meet the person in town when they're about?

[chinahorse]

That the surgeon will change his mind and refuse to do it mainly. And then there's travelling there in rush hour.

Yeah I will send them a message and set off myself soon.

[one_step_closer]

Will you be able to take some music or something with you this time? You've managed the journey before, you can do it again. I hope the surgeon will stick to his decision.

[chinahorse]

Just dug out my ipod and put it on charge. Also will take a book as I'll be in at least a day.

[one_step_closer]

Good plan. I hope everything goes ok.

[chinahorse]

Had the operation. Not straight into a skin graft. I don't know why but I gave a wound vacuum dressing on. Don't know for how long. Arm is like jelly due to having a nerve block.

[Auror.]

Glad you had the operation and I hope it helps. Hopefully they will explain to you what they did and why? How long will you have to stay in hospital?

[chinahorse]

It'll be because they need tissue to grow over tendons. That's what it was when I had one before

I have no idea.

[Auror.]

I don't understand it, but it sounds like you do? Are you okay with what they did?

[chinahorse]

Skin doesn't stick to tendons. They need my arm to grow a covering. The dressing helps that. I knew it was a possibility but I hoped it'd not be needed.

[Auror.]

Ohhh so that might increase the healing time required? But hopefully it will heal better this way than if you had not had the operation?

[chinahorse]

I'm hoping the surgeon will come round this morning so j can ask questions. The feeling is slowly coming back to my arm and it's weird and horrible

[one_step_closer]

That does sound really uncomfortable. I hope you can get your questions answered and also maybe get some relief from the physical feelings. Are the staff ok?

[chinahorse]

I'm trying tramadol now as oxycodon didn't help. The staff are lovely.

As I thought the burn went down to the tendons so that's why I have the vacuum dressing on. It's getting changed or checked on monday with a view to more surgery skin graft on Wednesday. As Wednesday is the next surgery day. Thankfully have no nerve damage yet.

[one_step_closer]

I'm glad people are being supportive. I hope the rest of your treatment goes well. Are you managing to occupy yourself?

[chinahorse]

I wish my family cared. They haven't even asked what hospital I'm in.
But it's nice that they staff are good.
I'm watching the tv. Simpson is on.

[chinahorse]

Anyone want to come visit me? I'm lonely.