Advice

[Black sheep]

Hi I wonder if anyone could help me I have this friend who been talking to me about how she is struggling to eat when she does eat its very little and only once a day, she has been to the doctor and there running test on why she's not eating but I just wonder if there was any words or advice I could give her to help her a long the way open to any help please

[laurenfae]

Hey :) It's great that you want to help your friend! There's not much you can do specifically except be there for her and also keep her mind off of things and help her to stay positive. I recommend that you do try not to be 'triggering' as well, because if the reason she's eating so little is because of an eating disorder, doing things such as talking about people's weight loss/gain, telling her she's skinny (even if it's meant in a negative way), setting a bad eating example yourself or talking about calories will only make her feel worse. I hope that helped you a bit :) x

[MissAnonymous]

I think you are a lovely friend for wanting to know how to best help her. I suggest you just encourage her to talk to the Drs and open up to them. Be supportive and distracting around meal times and try to just keep a lighthearted conversation going, focusing as little as possible on food itself.

Sometimes when things feel more natural and less watched, if there is an ED going on, it can help people just do what they need to, which is picking things up and eating them. I know I was more able to make better decisions when there was less focus on what decision I was going to make at times earlier on in my ED.

Keep posting if it helps and remember to look after yourself, its okay to chat to others if you are worried, but with hope your friend will be open and honest with the doctors looking into this with her and things will get better in time.

x

[Black sheep]

Thank you she opened up to me cause she feels I don't judge her I just listen and she feels she can put trust in me I was wondering if she drank a build me up milk shake would that help her as she only eats little or would that add to triggering her off I'm just trying to look at all the options there is for her

[Wonderland.]

I'm glad that she feels able to trust you so much that she can be open with you about things. You are obviously a really good friend to her.

Regarding the build up shakes, I personally would say that that kind of thing is probably best left up to the doctors to decide if she needs it, but others may think differently I don't know.

[Black sheep]

Ok thank you she comes back to uni next week just worried that with all the stress from uni and her family that she would end up not eating at all, that's why when she said what would I do I said see a doctor and she listen to me just though I'd ask here as well I am thankful for all your advice

[Wonderland.]

Well if she listened to you about going to see a doctor then perhaps it's worth broaching the subject of build up shakes to her. Normally people aren't so willing to go and see there doctor about not eating so thats really positive.

[Black sheep]

Ok thank you I will try to talk to her about it in a way I don't trigger her off :) thank you x

[Wonderland.]

Let us know how it goes (:

[Black sheep]

My friend is going to join this site she thinks it may help her in ways that its helped me thank u all for your help xx

[talaiporia]

Good luck to both of you. :)

[Black sheep]

Thank u xx

[yoyogirl]

tell its best if she gets help whilst she can otherwise things could get worse.