RYL Forums


Forum Jump
Post New Thread  Reply
Old 22-02-2020, 09:37 PM   #1
LRgrad15
 
When someone just suddenly decides to stop talking to you or someone else

I've always wondered, in general, what causes some people who claim to be great friends with you or someone else, to suddenly, without warning, stop talking to you one day. It's happened to me, and I've seen it happen to other people. In some cases, the reason is clear. Usually due to a conflict between two people. But in other cases, it's not clear since everything appeared to be fine and there was no conflict.

Have you experienced this before? For those who just simply stop talking to someone, especially someone who they consider a friend, I feel like it can be rude since they're just ghosting someone out without a good explanation, almost as if the one doing the ghosting never saw the other person as a friend in the first place. It can cause the recipient of the ghosting to feel burned and less willing to trust people, I know that is the case with me. I'll be honest, I've come to that conclusion towards others who do that.

Not just towards people who ghosted me out one day, but people I knew who did it to someone else, if there appeared to be no reason and there was definitely no conflict, then I assume that they most likely didn't see me or someone else as a friend in the first place. Either they just saw someone as a back up friend, or there was never a true friendship and the whole thing is a misunderstanding. Do you have any clues as to why some people do this? I understand people can stop being friends with whoever they want, but I feel like just shutting them out randomly one day is a bit harsh unless they actually did something to you.

As I mentioned, I have a harder time trusting people and expect people to do it to me since I've had this happen, and I know other people who have trust issues too due to this kind of behavior. They may even expect others to do it to them. I know for one person, I had to promise them and even prove to them that I wouldn't be one of those people who decides to randomly ghost them out. I never do that stuff to others but I completely understand why some people would be wary and assume anyone who they are friends with, even best friends, may just wake up one day and decide not to talk to them. I'm wary of other people too and expect people to do it as well. I don't feel offended when someone wonders if I would do that, since I have been on the receiving end of ghosting and completely understand their wariness.

  Reply With Quote
Old 22-02-2020, 10:49 PM   #2
Shirayuki
No one deserves to be forgotten
 
Shirayuki's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2019
Location: Hogwarts
I am currently:

i've had that happen to me to-

didn't bode very well with my trust issues ^^"

what happened?




We'll make it together, one small step at a time


Shirayuki is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 23-02-2020, 12:16 PM   #3
Deborrah
Has had the same avatar since 2011
 
Deborrah's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Ireland
I am currently:

Happens to me a lot. My fear of abandonment is very clear no matter how hard I try to hide it, so I guess people just don't know how to say they can't talk to me anymore in fear of a strong emotional reaction from me, so they just go.

Are you OK?



~* Don't you dare surrender *~
Don't leave me here without you
Cause I could never
~* Replace your perfect imperfection *~



Deborrah is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 23-02-2020, 05:32 PM   #4
LRgrad15
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by shirayuki View Post
i've had that happen to me to-

didn't bode very well with my trust issues ^^"

what happened?
Yeah same. Oh nothing recently. I'm okay right now, I just mean, in general I've wondered if anyone has experienced it and why some people cut people off in an ice cold way without explanation. I'm sure there's always a reason, but for some reason, some people will just not say what it is. I've had it happen where someone who I thought liked me as a friend would just ice me out. And honestly, if they can't be bothered to explain why, then I take that as a sign that they never saw me as a friend. Same thing goes for someone who does that to anyone else.

  Reply With Quote
Old 23-02-2020, 05:38 PM   #5
LRgrad15
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deborrah View Post
Happens to me a lot. My fear of abandonment is very clear no matter how hard I try to hide it, so I guess people just don't know how to say they can't talk to me anymore in fear of a strong emotional reaction from me, so they just go.

Are you OK?
Oh I'm sorry you struggle with that. My fear of abandonment is caused by people doing stuff like that. And I'm okay as of now, this was more of a general thought if anyone has experienced it and if they had any ideas or opinions as to why someone may ice another person out in a very cold manner. I've had people who I thought were friends who did that, and I've seen it happen to people I know as well. The conclusion I've come to is that if someone can't be bothered to tell you what's wrong or why they may be pulling away and they decide to shut you out without warning or explanation in an ice cold manner, than they were never really friends in the first place and were just faking it.

  Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Members Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Censor is ON
Forum Jump


Sea Pink Aroma
All times are GMT +1. The time now is 10:32 AM.