Can you help me?

[[Luna]]

Things have been rough for a little while. Struggling with mood, anxiety, sleeping problems and pain.

The last few days things have been feeling strange. My senses don't feel like they work properly, the world around me looks distorted and it feels like two realities are blending together. I've been seeing things that don't quite fit into this reality. Yesterday I could see people outside the window watching the house and it scared me.

I spoke to my wife about it and she said she thinks it's because I'm a bit unwell and it's really important that I trust her when she says it's not real and don't start believing the things I see.
Can I get some help with this? It's confusing and scary.

[Buttons.]

That does sound really scary, I can identify with things not quite gelling with reality and that being really disconcerting. I think your wife is right that you need to try to trust her if your own mind is playing tricks, although I know it's not easy. When people tell me things aren't real/are a little different to how I'm perceiving them I try and think to myself (if it's a person I trust) why on earth would they lie to me? The answer is, they wouldn't. Hope that helps, even a little.

[Cpt_Stunning]

I think it's called disassocation, a lot of it is down to negative thinking I think, can you breathe OK?

[[Luna]]

Thank you both. Katy, that is helpful. I will try and keep that in my mind.
I have to fight with the thoughts that these things are real and I can see them because the evil inside makes me see things other don't.

I managed to go out to the shops but I felt tense when I was outside. kept feeling like I was being followed and the colours of the trees were too bright. It was like they were glowing.

I do dissociate and I have been feeling fuzzy and disconnected a lot recently. I think it's a result of feeling very stressed and overwhelmed lately.

[[Luna]]

Keep feeling spacey and been having nightmares.
Seeing shadow creatures in the walls.
The lights feel too bright.
I feel so overwhelmed.

[Auror.]

Does limiting stimuli help at all? Like turning off or dimming lights, sunglasses, maybe earplugs or some type of white noise?

What do you do for grounding? Have you tried any of those skills?

[[Luna]]

I did try turning all the lights off and sitting with some music (without lyrics) and it helped a bit.

I've just been to the hospital for a glucose management group as I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes last week. I have to alter my diet and monitor my blood sugar four times a day as well as going back and forth to the diabetes clinic. I have an consultation with chiropractor this afternoon for my Symphysis pubis dysfunction. It's causing my a lot of pain so I'm hoping there is something they can do about it. I'm nervous as I don't like strangers touching me.

My Dad has been poorly. He went to the hospital for some tests and they've found a abnormality in his bowel. He's got more scans and tests to find out if it's cancer. I'm trying not to worry until we know what it is but I can't help going through various scenearios and I'm scared.

Still feeling very overwhelmed a lot of the time. This month is going to be a tough one.

just trying to cope. It's hard.

[nonperson]

Hi Luna. I'm a type 1 diabetic and, although it's probably very different to gestational diabetes, if you have any questions I'm more than willing to help if I can!

[[Luna]]

Thank you, that is really kind of you. I don't know much about type 1 diaebetes but I imagine gestational diabetes is probably very mild in comparison.

I had a bad night. A lot of panic attacks and nightmares.
I feel like rubbish. I'm so tired of this.

[Auror.]

It does sound like you have so much going on and it is no wonder it is all overwhelming. Unknowns are really the worst to have to sit with and when it is as serious of health stuff as it sounds like, that is just so so stressful.

Do you have any support for your mental health right now, or is it all just for your physical health stuff?

[nonperson]

Quote:

Originally Posted by [Luna]

Thank you, that is really kind of you. I don't know much about type 1 diaebetes but I imagine gestational diabetes is probably very mild in comparison.

I don't think that any type of diabetes is mild. Each one is quite different in how to control it and none of it is easy! =/

[[Luna]]

Thank you both.

I see a support worker. I saw her today. I told her about some of the stuff going on. She said to stay positive and to call her if I need to talk.

It's difficult to stay positive when I feel like I'm being worn into the ground. My head feels all over the place. It feels never ending. I'm honestly struggling to cope.

[Auror.]

Sometimes staying positive isn't always the greatest advice and can really sound invalidating.

When you say you're struggling to cope, is there anything specific? Maybe we can try to offer some suggestions or help you break things down a bit?

[[Luna]]

I'll try and write it in bullet points because it feels all jumbled in my head.

- I haven't been sleeping well for months because of nightmares. It's been progressively getting worse with flashbacks, horrible dreams and panic attacks throughout the night. Mornings I feel more exhausted than I did when I went to bed.

- I find this time of year really difficult with trauma. Various things trigger off bad feelings and memories.

- My pregnancy is progressing well but my body is struggling. I have SPD which is causing constant pain, I'm badly anaemic and now have the gestational diabetes. I feel physically awful all the time. Dizzy, exhausted, struggling to breathe, weak.

- My wife is really stressed out with work and there's a lot of things going on with my step-son which is putting strain on all of us.

- I'm worried about my dad. The waiting and not knowing.

- Got things to sort in the house, things to think about and organise the baby. Trying to work out a birth plan.

- I keep seeing scary things. Feel like I'm being watched and followed. Things keep looking distorted.

- For the first time in a while self-harm urges are getting quite high. I feel trapped. Everyday. Like I'm suffocating and there's no escape. I have thoughts of suicide which obviously I'm not going to act upon but it feels like the only way out of feeling so overwhelmed, scared and trapped. I feel so low all the time. I don't know how to do this.

[[Luna]]

I had an appointment with the Chiropractor and feeling very sore from it.

I tried to go to bed to have a nap but i started hearing static and a wierd voices saying words. I started seeing images behind my eyes of childhood stuff and parts of me being cut open. Everything was flashing and it felt like my head was going to explode. It was scary and confusing. I feel a bit strange.

[Auror.]

That does sound scary. Could you maybe use some grounding skills to try to see if it passes? It sounds like maybe silence is not the greatest for you. Do you have any type of white noise machine or app you could try using when going to bed?

[[Luna]]

The bright light is dangerous. It's not safe. He's behind it and the hands are coming.
I try to say it's not safe. I see a light and a girl and she need to get out but she's not moving and he's behind the light waiting.
I can't make her move.

[[Luna]]

The radio voice is telling me to run. Keeps saying not safe not safe not safe.
I'm scared to leave the house. I'm scared to stay.
I'm not dressed. Everything is slow.

[Buttons.]

*Hugs gently* sorry no words but read and I care.

[Cpt_Stunning]

I find time does go very slow when I feel scared.