Finally realized my mother may be abusive

[damocles23]

She dismisses me and my feelings, constantly gaslights me to make me feel guilty, and never ever admits she's at fault. She yelled at me for half an hour for opening the wrong carton on milk, and I was a little on the edge, but still treats me like a criminal. Whenever she's at fault it takes a lot to strong arm her to admit she is fault. The best I get is always a "Well, after everything you've done, we're even." She had a hard life, and still has one, but uses this to justify this.

[Pi.R^2]

This sounds really tricky. Do you spend a lot of time with your mum? If possible, having some time and space away from her might be helpful as you process these feelings and work out where you want to go from here.