Hopefully you have got some sleep now. Keep us updated when you can and keep on talking to the nurses there. We are here if you need us Beckie.
Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson "I hear those voices that will not be drowned" Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
Please do not pm me without permission as I find getting PMs very stressful.
I really do not want to be here
I want to go home
But they say I have to be here for at least 2 weeks
I feel gross because I've not showered or changed clothes since I got here.
I have some clothes coming in a delivery tomorrow though.
I can't eat or drink because of the contamination.
If I can't bleed it out then this is the only option
I don't think they've noticed
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
*hugs* Unfortunately you aren't likely to get home soon if you aren't eating or drinking. If you don't eat or drink forever then you will absolutely never get home because you'll die, sorry for being harsh. What enabled you to drink the coke the police gave you? Hospital is a safe place for starting to eat and drink more because if there are any adverse reactions then they can be looked into and hopefully treated. You can get through this.
I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.
I could drink the coke because I was at a medical hosptial and I still thought they would help me.
I drink water to take my meds.
No one believes me about the contamination so if I did start to feel ill they wouldn't believe me
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
They would notice if you were physically unwell though, if something was potentially damaging you, whether they believe you about what you think is happening or they don't. You'd likely get more unwell if you don't start eating and drinking more, I think that would be more problematic than giving it a try.
I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.
I just don't trust them.
I think they've started to notice I'm not eating or drinking.
I don't feel well.
I wish I could sleep but I'm just not getting tired
I had to take 3 different sleep meds to get to sleep at 2am this morning.
Its awful.
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
Not to point out the potentially obvious, but if you aren't eating you won't be able to sleep. Your body literally needs food to be able to relax and rest.
Nothing bad has happened since you had the coke, right? Do you think it might be worth testing to see if you ate or drank something else if anything happened? Or could you order food or drinks from the outside tomorrow, if that might feel safer?
You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.
I don't mean to doubt you Beckie, but I guess Pomegrante has a point. I know when I've overdosed for example, the typical thing to get the drug out of your system is to flush it out with loads of fluids. Perhaps if you can explain how not eating and drinking helps it to leave your body it might make more sense? I don't want to suggest things as I guess I misunderstood how it works, and I'm sorry for that.
You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.
What do the signs/dreams/voices mean to you? Why do you believe them so fully over everyone else and where are you getting all the information about what does and doesn't help with the contamination?
I'm not trying to be harsh or cruel or anything, I can't think of a way to put this that sounds kinder and more understanding.
I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.
I could be wrong, but I know here they cannot admit you to a non medical unit like psych unless you area signed off by a medical doctor to be medically stable. I guess to me if you have been there a few days now and you have not been transferred to a medical ward or anything, maybe they thought it was an obvious conclusion that you are not contaminated? Can you ask?
I know it feels very real to you and I am not trying to invalidate that. But what you are describing, at least to us about how to get rid of it does not sound like it is based in any physical or medical knowledge of the body that I have heard and to be honest it sounds like the logic actually goes against things I've been told. I am not a medical doctor, but if what you have said is accurate it does not sound like a medical based issue. Again not denying that the fear and distress being caused is not real because that is quite real. But I guess I would wonder, if you were not contaminated from a medical perspective what that would mean or change to you?
You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.
I just spoke to a nurse that I trust and she said well done for having a cup of tea.
But was also pretty harsh and said I was very unwell and psychotic and delusional. That was hard to hear.
Moving wards at 1pm.
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
