Am I the only one who gets exhausted being around other people because I am constantly pretending to be happy? I feel like they are thinking what I am thinking about myself. I've just got where I do not want to be around my boyfriends family, they trigger my anxiety and I don't know why. It's not like they really do anything. His Mom is really shy too like I am and it is awkward over there. Maybe that is why. I am just so tired of feeling bad about myself. I just want some peace. I know to not look at the number on the scales but what I see is totally different than what I see when I look at myself. I am also thinking bad thoughts like throwing up my food. I know that is not something that needs to be done.