Discomfort with showing emotions in front of others

Reminiscer · 07-06-2020, 11:49 PM

Does anyone have any discomfort showing emotions in front of others? I do agree with the fact that it is good to be able to let your emotions out and that there is nothing wrong with crying in front of a close friend, whether it's a guy or a girl. It is supposed to get the stress off our chests. But I've heard where even though people may claim that they are more than willing to be there for someone and they are okay with someone crying in front of them, when it actually happens, many people report how uncomfortable they truly felt and some may even go as far as to say they wish the person didn't cry in front of them and hope it won't happen again.

In a way, this probably has more to do with them than the person crying, but knowing that there are people that may not respond in a good way could cause people to be afraid of showing emotion in front of others. I am afraid of this since in the past, there has been some people who all I did was announce that I had to attend a funeral. Didn't even cry, wasn't that affected since I didn't have a close relationship with the deceased and the death was expected. All that happened was someone asking what I was up to and I told them I was preparing to head back home from college to attend a funeral.

That person avoided me and wouldn't talk to me until after I came back and even had to convince her that I wasn't even affected too much. That had me very alarmed. What if I had lost someone really close? What if I broke down? That could have resulted in an embarrassing moment and I worry someone else, even a good friend, could react the same way. I'm not friends with her anymore due to her not being a true friend in the first place, but I do know other people who admit that having someone show emotions in front of them, even a close friend, makes them very uncomfortable and sometimes cause them to shut down.

Does anyone feel uncomfortable with people showing emotions in front of you? I get that it can be uncomfortable but if someone reacts to a point where they avoid someone who cried in front of them, it makes you not want to confide in them anymore. I know I'm very weary about who I confide in. Last thing I would want is for someone to shut me out just because I showed emotion if it was for a good reason. Do you feel comfortable showing emotions in front of others, even close friends? Like I said, I know it's good to let it out, but it seems that there are quite a bit of people out there that just can't handle having someone cry in front of them which could result in people hiding their emotions.

RaeNoctem · 06-07-2020, 11:43 PM

I don't feel uncomfortable doing so, but I rarely tear up in the presence of others. I tend to hold back, in order to help others, then have a good cry when I'm alone.

But sometimes the pain is too much. Lost someone in May, age 26 in a motorcycle accident. Haven't seen him much in recent years. But grew up together like he was a baby brother to me. And with lockdown, couldn't do the funeral. So stood alone on the opposite side of the road to watch him of, and that broke me. I was in tears, first time publically in over a decade.

But that's just the way I am. I don't care if people cry in front of me, don't care to cry in front of them. Usually I'm trying to keep strong for some one else, then have my moment alone.

But I don't think there is a right or wrong. If someone doesn't like, that is their issue. However, they should be mature enough to step away, and not let it dictate a friendship.