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Old 12-10-2020, 08:34 PM   #161
Darkwings44
 
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ok i will

ive tried to speak to the boss of the group home and he said that because it was minor stuff he said that he would overlook what supposedly i did and that he already handled the situation with the staff



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Old 12-10-2020, 08:50 PM   #162
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pomegranate View Post
You know, I really think you need to speak to psychologist or an advocate because this doesn’t seem fair. You’ve also said before you aren’t under any legal guardianship or anything so I’d also question how legal this all is if that’s the case.

Do you have regular reviews with managers or a case lead at the group home? This is the kind of thing it might be helpful to bring up with them in those meetings if so.

Re ‘needing’ a blade. I’d beg to differ tbh. Sounds like you’re really upset and angry (and understandably so) and maybe a blade is how you’re used to handling those overwhelming feelings? That being said.....another way to look at it would be, is the douche bag staff member worth harming yourself over? Do you deserve a possibly permanent reminder of that person?

How you might otherwise manage those crappy feelings could maybe be something to talk with psychologist about? Not necessarily personal feelings if you don’t trust her just yet, but her ideas for how you can manage without turning to self harm...?
i already spoke to the boss and he said that he worked it out with the staff member

i dont think so.... the boss does has meetings with staff only (not with us the clients) when stuff major happens but other then that i dont know if that happens.....

yeah sh is how i deal with my emotions.......... i never looked at it that way before.... no shes not......and i dont.....

ok i'll try...



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….



Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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Old 13-10-2020, 02:38 AM   #163
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The following content has been hidden - Reason : the truth
ive been posting on the recovery board about my ED and no one really replys back.... i feel alone on it… im thinking of going to pro forums instead ive tried recovery but it seems pointless.... time to embrace my friend ana…. its time to embrace anorexia..... im sorry



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….



Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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Old 13-10-2020, 02:56 AM   #164
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I'm not sure if you've noticed the dates and amount of replies in other threads on the ED board, but the ED board is not active. It's not about you, it's just for a lot of people, they either don't have experience with EDs, or aren't in a place to look at the board, which is why that board as a whole gets very few replies. This is another one of those things where it would be far more effective to speak to your therapist about and get actual support on your urges, instead of being self destructive and going on sites that it sounds like you know won't be helpful for you.

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Old 13-10-2020, 08:53 PM   #165
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....no..... i havent.......

I don't trust my therapist though and i cant get another one I'm stuck with my current therapist..... who i really dont like....



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….



Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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Old 14-10-2020, 01:15 AM   #166
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I get that. I'm gonna echo what has been suggested that the way to begin to build trust is to start trying to talk about even little things with the therapist, and possibly look into advocacy as Pomegranate has mentioned a few times. There are definitely ways to build up trust and possibly get your needs met in a different way, it just will take time and effort and possibly input from advocacy services. Best of luck!

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Old 14-10-2020, 01:23 AM   #167
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ok i'll try



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….



Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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Old 14-10-2020, 09:42 PM   #168
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I feel so selfish eating food because I feel like im leting ana down and I cant get the food out i cant purge because i cant do it without making noise!! I hate myself so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….



Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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Old Yesterday, 10:13 PM   #169
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i told the truth to the therpist about how i felt about her..... finelly



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….



Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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Old Yesterday, 10:31 PM   #170
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i dont know why i tryed looking her up online i know that she doesn't feel the same way i feel and probably forgotten all about me because it was at the end of my high school years when we last spoke to each other but at the same time i still love her and miss her!!!!!!! she was my first love for crying out loud!!!!!!!! and she was straight shes not a gay person like me!!!!!!!!!!!! my heart hurts so much!!!!!


Last edited by Darkwings44 : Yesterday at 10:42 PM. Reason: more added to it


just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….



Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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