i really struggling even more than i was before because of the girls sentence, she should of got longer she should, he got long time but she didnt and she was the worse one out of them. why didnt she get same as him why? she hurt me more, its not fair *cries*
im not coping well right now and the bad thoughts are getting worse and worse and so are the flashbacks. ive had enough, its all to much just to much
im sorry for moaning i so sorry *curls up tight crying*
*wraps arms around n holds you* no sorry hun. and its all over, you did it jo!
she shouldve gotten longer. can you ask your lawyer why she didnt? could be a technical issue.
wish had better thing to say. wish could jus take away all the pain n flashbacks. cant. youve done it, theyre in jail, its all over...keep fightin, for you. they dont have any power over you. *hugs*
Every day the world is made a chance to change but i feel the same.
And I wonder why would i wait till i die to come alive?"
All alone the way she feels
Left alone to deal with all the pain-drenched sorrow relief
i speaking to solicitor on monday to discuss things i'll ask her then why she got short sentence.
im really struggling and i cant get my head around it i really cant, she should of got years she should, what she did to me was horrendous and worse than him in a way, why she only get short time why?
im a complete mess and my head is plotting and planning constantly, my thoughts are horrible and im scared. i feel like im losing it completely, it just all to much and im physically done in too. my carer's woried about me and the doctor wants me to go into hospital for a while and i just want to break down.
*cries uncontrollably*
let carer n doc help you hun. *hands eeyore to you* its a lot to take in, gonna take some time to process. they can help you not need to be scared of self <3
Every day the world is made a chance to change but i feel the same.
And I wonder why would i wait till i die to come alive?"
All alone the way she feels
Left alone to deal with all the pain-drenched sorrow relief
i think ive just had a total meltdown, its all got to much.
my carer wont leave me on my own for a second and they are trying to find me a bed in hospital. im scared of what im going to do next, my thoughts have taken over.
right now i dont want to be here or anywhere.
thought id be better now its all over, but ive just crashed what is wrong with me?
Nothing is wrong. you and your emotions and all are trying to cope.
I love you and am always here for you.
Your care r wont leave you alone because she cares about you jo.
i hope they can find a bed becuase it will help you. It has before.
Email or pm me whenever love.
*cuddles you close in my arms and rocks you all night long*
These kicks take me far away my dear; Far away from myself Far away from my troubles
Far away from heaven
thank you libz and i love you too *cuddles into you close*
theyve got me a bed i go in this afternoon for a couple of days.
im meeting with my solicitor this morning to discuss the hearing and sentences, i need to know why she didnt get that long, i just need to no why.
my head is a mess just now and ive just fallen apart completely, im exhausted and tired of living like this. i hope being in hospital helps i really do.
i will try and get on here by using my phone when in hospital so i dont feel completely shut off from everyone.
*hugs Jo*
I'm glad they've got you a bed darling. I think it will really help you. Please, try to let them help you as much as possible.
I hope the meeting with the solicitor goes okay and she's able to explain things a little more to you.
I know it doesn't feel like it but the worst part is over now, and you can slowly start to recover.
I'm always just a PM or email away <3 Anytime.
x Katie x
echo whats already been said, theres nothing wrong with you per se, youve been through a lot n court was very hard, is all tryin be processed n its a lot. glad got bed, hope it helps. *hugs* whatd the solicitor say about the sentence?
Every day the world is made a chance to change but i feel the same.
And I wonder why would i wait till i die to come alive?"
All alone the way she feels
Left alone to deal with all the pain-drenched sorrow relief
i discharged myself from the hospital yesterday, i couldnt take being in there anymore it just wasnt helping one bit.
my mood is still very very low and i feel so alone just now.
i did speak with my solicitor and she said that she thinks they didnt take into account the enormity of what she actually did to me and thats why she got the light sentence. shes going to look into whether we can appeal against it.
ive not heard anymore from her since i was in the hospital.
i sorry for worrying you Katie my phone wouldnt work in hospital so i couldnt get on here i sorry.
hospital was completely useless, i dont think they even noticed i was there half the time. they gave me a crisis number to ring if i need too but thats it.
im feeling so low and depressed just now im struggling to keep myself going
im really really struggling and i dont no how to make things better and im scared. my thoughts are so dark and horrible and urges to harm are so strong, i keep trying to fight but im losing. i feel so alone and scared.
*curls up tight* want to feel safe please
i hope it can get appealed n your solicitor gets back to you soon. im sorry hospital didnt help you. *snuggles gently* what things can you do to distract yourself that you enjoy? would talkin to someone or just writing out your thoughts for yourself help?
Every day the world is made a chance to change but i feel the same.
And I wonder why would i wait till i die to come alive?"
All alone the way she feels
Left alone to deal with all the pain-drenched sorrow relief
i was hoping to hear from my solicitor before easter but i didnt, maybe she's holding off because its bad news or something. im going crazy just the thought that she could be out in 5-6 months with good behaviour is doing me in.
i tried to write down my bad thoughts yesterday but it was so hard, distraction worked for a while but then my head took over. i hate feeling like this i just want it to stop now ive had enough i cant cope no more.
im sorry im just really not coping and struggling so bad atm
could be because bad news, or could be because she hasn't heard back from the people she needs to.
tryin is good jo. no sorry needed cause struggling. you gettin out of the house much? even just a walk around the neighborhood or sittin outside for awhile can be good. *snuggles gently*
Every day the world is made a chance to change but i feel the same.
And I wonder why would i wait till i die to come alive?"
All alone the way she feels
Left alone to deal with all the pain-drenched sorrow relief
