Hi there. As the victim of sexual abuse from my grandfather I understand the damage it causes and can appreciate your position.
I can also really understand your anger, and I think anger is a natural, healthy and necessary response to the situation. However, as a person in a very similar situation to your daughters, I wonder if pursuing further action is helpful at this stage. Although your daughters have stated that they don't feel justice has been served (understandably) it doesn't sound like, from what you've posted, that they want to do anything more involving him at this stage? It may be that they need to concentrate the energy on rebuilding their lives and going through the healing process, which at this current time, may not involve further action with him, as they've already invested so much courage on taking him to court. It doesn't necessarily mean they can't pursue further (legal) action in future, to my knowledge.
I can only add my thoughts as a survivor and don't have experience of being a mother, so in that regard I can only imagine how much you want him to be punished for the harm he's caused your daughters. I think, what you're doing by supporting them, is the best any mother could do.
Your last sentence resonated with me. My grandfather is 90 now, but I do take some comfort from knowing that after he was confronted about his actions, he has lived a sad, lonely and angry life of his own making. I have continued to live with what he's done and it isn't an easy life, but it's a life surrounded by loved ones, as survivors deserve (but don't always get, unfortunately).
Anyway, I'm starting to ramble so I just wanted to wish you and your daughters strength in this journey.
Last edited by Soft Kitty : 04-01-2019 at 01:54 PM.
|