Everything is falling apart*rant*

[sie1361]

I use to be the friend people would ask for advice. how did you recover? I just played along like that's what happened. Now shits falling apart and im alone in this and I did this to myself instead of being honest when things where small now I cant deal with it and everyone thinks I am better. My boyfriend said it doesnt bother him unless i work on getting better no purging no self harm but now i can tell him because then i failed and he might break up with me. I am in counseling but idk how to talk to her yet shes new with me. my meds arent working, i cant get a job and working scares me because of ppl and anxiety, I have been purging again along with fasting but i am a bigger girl so its fine, and im trying really hard not to self harm. I dont know what im suppose to do about this i just feel really stuck.

[Pi.R^2]

Hey there, I'm sorry that things are so tough at the moment. It can take time to trust a counsellor enough to talk about things; do you think you'll be able to stick with it and try to get to the point where you can be more open?

Just because you are a bigger girl, doesn't mean there's nothing to worry about with regards to purging and fasting; both of them are damaging, no matter what size you are so I hope you will be able to get some help with that.

Do you know what leads you to feel like you want to hurt yourself/purge?