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Old 14-09-2019, 05:36 AM   #1
MF12
 
Join Date: Sep 2019
Location: Texas
Show my therapist my scars?

I’ve been seeing my therapist for 4.5 years now. I really trust her and we have a good working relationship. In the time I’ve been seeing her I have done a lot of work and am now 4 year sober from alcohol. I haven’t been able to stop cutting but I have had longer periods without needing to.

Recently my cutting has increased so we’ve been talking about it more. I have a few small scars on one arm so she’s seen those but the rest of my scars are hidden. I have a few on my upper thighs that are old but for the last 15ish years I’ve been cutting only on my breasts. No one has seen the scars with the exception of my gyno who has also had to stitch me. I wear a bra even during sex. I have dozens, probably over 100 scars on each breast. I’m so so ashamed of them and it keeps me from dating.

I have heard some people say showing their scars helped their recovery. I showed my therapist a very graphic photo one time- it was a couple years old when I showed it to her- but in the photo I was in a black out and had cut myself so it was intense. It really helped me be more open with her about my cutting. So I just wonder if showing her my scars- healed and not- would help? If it was just on my arms I wouldn’t be as hesitant but given it’s my breasts it just seems weird.

Has anyone showed their therapist? Has anyone showed their therapist a location other than arms? If your therapist was comfortable with it, would you do it? I’m nervous to even ask her because if she says no I think it would make me feel more shame.

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Old 14-09-2019, 08:45 PM   #2
Koala hugs
 
Join Date: Aug 2019
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Hi no advice but hope whatever u decide that u find some peace with ur decision. Hugs.

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Old 14-09-2019, 10:46 PM   #3
LucyB93
 
Join Date: Sep 2019

I showed mine my scars, to be totally honest they didn’t give me much support with dealing with it. It’s entirely your decision but I hope you do get better support than I did if you decide to.

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Old 15-09-2019, 10:59 AM   #4
one_step_closer
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland

Would you mean showing her a photo? If it helped to show the photo of self harm before and you think that now showing a photo of things as they are healing would be useful then you could maybe discuss that with your therapist first. What would you hope to gain from it? Some professionals have seen my scars but I haven't felt positive about it, but that's just my view because I want to create more scars. I definitely think it would be good to discuss it with your therapist first and get her opinion. I hope that whatever you decide it is the best thing for you. Good luck with continuing your recovery.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.

Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.

You didn't come this far just to come this far.


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Old 16-09-2019, 03:13 AM   #5
Auror.
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: USA

Basically as said above.

I think the location in itself might be tricky to show in person. Definitely speak to your therapist about it and see what she says, and have a think about what you might like showing her to accomplish. I know folks who have shown photos of more sensitive areas as an alternative and found it helpful. Everyone's reasons differ in why they want to show scars or not, and what they might find helpful. I hope you can talk to your therapist about it, and well done on 4 years sober!



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