I like my scars. Why?

[Rock_bexause_rule]

So guys I'm confused, I've been self harming for the past 3 years. I only did when something bothered me or made me mad and upset but now I like doing it. I know it's bad and can be dangerous thing but it's a new feeling that I haven't had for the past 3 years. I do it randomly I'll purposely go to my room to do it so it's not like I'm exactly bored. But I don't know why I do it either. Whenever I look at my new scars I smile, they make me happy, even tho it wasn't something I overcame and self harmed, but just because I wanted to. I actually get frustrated that all my scars that I had are gone, but now I have a bunch of them but still want more even tho I can still see the ones i recently did. Can anyone help me understand that better or knows what I'm going thru.

[nonperson]

I think there must be an underlying reason why you do it, not just because it makes me happy. And it might make you "happy" now but in a few years time you may regret it massively.

I also plan it into my day, to do it purposefully, of sorts. For some people it's a planned thing, for others it is more spontaneous.

The problem is it's an addictive habit regardless of why it's done. You started it much like anyone else, but now it's the feeling it gives you that you're after - release, pride, perceived happiness...

Is there anything safer you could replace SH with that would give you the same feelings?

[Buttons.]

Quote:

Originally Posted by nonperson

I think there must be an underlying reason why you do it, not just because it makes me happy. And it might make you "happy" now but in a few years time you may regret it massively.

I also plan it into my day, to do it purposefully, of sorts. For some people it's a planned thing, for others it is more spontaneous.

The problem is it's an addictive habit regardless of why it's done. You started it much like anyone else, but now it's the feeling it gives you that you're after - release, pride, perceived happiness...

Is there anything safer you could replace SH with that would give you the same feelings?

QFT

[Jcam88]

I completely understand as this has partly been a big issue for me too. I sometimes want to SI but for no reason at all other then I just want to. I like my scars and wish I had more. None of that makes any sense and never has. I started to SI when I was 15 then gave it up at 22 and then started again 6 months ago (I'm 30 now) and initially it's because of mental distress but then it just becomes habit and there's no reason to do it other then I just want to. So you're not alone in feeling this way.

[Pi.R^2]

Closing due to age.
OP, feel free to PM a moderator if you would like this thread reopened at any point.