First of all, I would like to apologise for asking for help but not being good at supporting others, I do feel quite bad about it.
I just need some advice really.
I took an apparently major OD last week for seemingly no reason.
I had planned it the day before but I don't know why.
I'm having urges to do it again and I still don't know why.
I don't have a CC at the moment but I don't feel in crisis enough to call duty worker.
I feel a bit silly about it really
I am not sure what to do
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
Wanna talk through what might be causing you to act impulsivly/not knowing why?
Is there a feeling you're trying to get or push away?
Is there something you need to say but can't?
Can you recognise any repeating thoughts, even if they seem unrelated?
I think seeing as you have no CC it'd be perfectly reasonable to call the duty worker instead.
This is something you really should talk to someone about and there's no reason to feel silly about it at all.
Also... I was wondering whether it was a boredom thing, I know you've been struggling with having nothing to do during the day. It could make your mind more likely to think about certain behaviours/coping methods, etc. Just a thought.
J, I guess the feeling is wanting to escape my own head.
I'm not sure why, its just a hard place to be. Thinking too much.
I just keep imagining doing it.
I want to just be totally out of it for a while.
It could be the boredom thing np.
I have too much time to think
I have been told i have an active mind and need lots of stimulation which I am not getting right now
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
I think having something to channel your thoughts and energy into would be good. Do you enjoy writing or painting? Or maybe getting lost in RPGs for a bit. Balancing 'active' quite time with socialising is going to give your brain the wide range of stimulation it needs.
Just an idea of something to do - how about creating an online photo book of Jasmine's early years, complete with descriptions and memories? She will really value that when she gets older.
Just an idea of something to do - how about creating an online photo book of Jasmine's early years, complete with descriptions and memories? She will really value that when she gets older.
That sounds like a lovely idea!
'Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.'
['There is only one thing we say to death. Not today'.']
'We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell. Oscar Wilde
Its hard to dance with the devil on your back. Sydney Carter
How are you doing today Beckie? I know that it's so easy to become caught up in self destructive thoughts especially when you're not occupied. There have been some good ideas suggested for filling your time in a way that you can use your mind. Sometimes it helps to have a written list of things you can occupy yourself with and small goals to achieve with those things. Getting started with something can be hard, even if it's something enjoyable, but usually I find that if I can take the first steps to start doing something I can get into it with time. I hope you're alright.
I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.
Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.
Was thinking about heading up to the retail park tomorrow just to do something different
Theres a pets at home and costa and some other shops so it should help keep me busy for a bit
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
Yes it does, that's why I want to go!
I've asked my letting agent if I can have rats, she's going to ask the landlord.
I think it would be really helpful to have animals and a reason to get up in the morning and have responsibility.
Thinking a lot about ODing today but I managed not to buy the pills when I was in town which is good I guess
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
