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12-03-2010, 10:23 PM
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#1
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Join Date: Apr 2009
I am currently:
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Triggering (SI/ED) - *suicide*Giving up time, yeah?
I don't know what to do with myself currently.
I can feel myself slipping. My eating has gone down hill, the urges to cut are getting horrible again. I have bruises all over my legs from punching myself.
I'm having terrible mood swings & I feel like I'm pushing everybody away.
The full depression hasn't even set in yet, but I know it's coming.
I can feel it slowly seeping in, and hurting me.
I've been fasting and I feel like shit all the time; I'm dizzy and weak and lightheaded. I ate today and I feel horrendously guilty about it.
No matter what I do, I lose either way. I feel like shit if I don't eat, I feel like shit if I do eat.
I fought with a friend about this last night, he wants me to get help. I can't do that.
Everybody should give up on me.
I am.
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12-03-2010, 10:43 PM
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#2
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: UK
I am currently:
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:( im really sorry that you feel this way but i understand what you mean about eating and not eating and not wanting help.
pm me if you need me.
things get better... they always do
xx
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13-03-2010, 12:29 AM
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#3
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Join Date: Mar 2010
I am currently:
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I'm sorry too. :(
I also understand what you mean. If I don't eat, I'm miserable. If I do eat, I'm miserable. And even though I hate my eating disorder and everything about it, I don't want help.
You're not alone. Please don't give up on yourself. No matter how bad things are now, you can get through it. Things will get better.
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13-03-2010, 12:42 AM
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#4
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Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: U.S.
I am currently:
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Hun, I know you're going through a hard time, but things won't be like this forever.
I wish I could help more than I have been, and I'm really sorry.
So many people care about you.
You're such a strong person, and you can get through this.
I'm always here for you.
Love you, m'dear.
*hugs*
<3
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13-03-2010, 01:59 AM
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#5
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Join Date: Mar 2007
I am currently:
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Nobody is going to give up on you sweetheart, people care about you and want to get better. You can fight this, please don't give up. *Gives lots of gentle cuddles and love*
xxxx
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You can't lose hope when it's hopeless.
You gotta hope more,
then put your fingers in your ears and go,
"Blah blah blah blah!"
I miss you Pip ♥
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13-03-2010, 02:14 AM
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#6
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Join Date: Apr 2009
I am currently:
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Thank you for the support everybody.
I just feel so lost. My eating is really messing me up, I don't think I have an eating disorder though. I just..I can't stand being so fat. That's my main problem, I think. Being fat.
It depresses me, I feel like I'm going to be stuck like this forever.
*sigh* My friend is really blunt in saying that I need help, part of me wants help, but I can't do it. I can't seem to realize that this is an actual, serious problem.
I'm just, I'm stuck in hell in my own mind.
I want to starve.
I don't want to starve.
I want to cut.
I don't want to cut.
I want to die.
I don't want to die.
No matter what I do, it's never the right thing and my mind is going to criticize me anyways.
I'm at a loss.
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