Inappropriate things to say to someone who self harms
I decided to make this thread as a place where people can get innappropriate things off their chest that people have said to them regarding self harm... Sometimes i think you just need to say what's been said, get it out of your system and say how it affected you and then move on, i know it's happened to me more than once hence the thread...
I'll start us off... These are by a doctor / nurse but this thread is for anyone who says it.
'Why do you do this, you're too pretty to hurt yourself'
I'm not pretty, but even if i was it wouldn't be a reason not to.
'At least this isn't as bad as last time'
I knew i should have made it worse...
'If you'd gone a millimeter deeper you would have hit the radial artery'
uhh thanks... now that's going to be triggering my in my head all night. Target practice.
The phrase I hate is "you are an intelligent girl, why are you doing this to yourself?"
^ I've had that one a lot too... frustrating doesn't begin to cover it!
Then there's the whole guilt trip thing... 'Do you think it's fair living with your gran and hiding this from her? What happens when you go too far and she finds you?'
or
'You're the same age as my daughter... I would want to know'
"Should I just use a piece of broken glass then? It doesn't look like you'd mind the scarring."
damn that was harsh!
when i was younger i got 'do you think its cool?' and 'what if the kids (my lil sisters and nieces) see??'
yea because i just didnt feel crap enough, thanks.
http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?p=2851063#post2851063 <<< loving this thread!!
I hate the 'but you're intelligent / pretty' one too - I had this from the hospital cleaner along with a load of personal questions - I felt so trapped there trying to be polite & not scream
"Should I just use a piece of broken glass then? It doesn't look like you'd mind the scarring."
Oh my god, what a horrendous thing to say!
The one I hate is: "I thought you grew out of that." like its a matter of immaturity.
"I asked the sun to tell me about the big bang. The sun said 'It hurts to become.'" -- Andrea Gibson, I Sing The Body Electric Especially When My Power Is Out
i hate when you cant escape just because your trying to be polite. poor you.
i also got 'is that not what kids do?' and my bf checking my dress came down to my boots to make sure his family wouldnt see my scars. he didnt say it but that look made me feel like crap.
http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?p=2851063#post2851063 <<< loving this thread!!
The one I hate is: "I thought you grew out of that." like its a matter of immaturity.
I god, I've had that one. I told a friend about my SH and he asked how long I'd been doing it. I said, 'about a year and a half,' and he just snorted and said, 'oh I thought it was a real problem, that's just a phase you're going through.'
... and then there was shouting.
Каждому, каждому в лучшее верится,
Катится, катится голубой вагон!
A nurse saying i was "ruining my beauty", I was like what effing beauty? Or same nurse saying "oh those cuts aren't too bad". sorry, next time I'll cut worse. A psych saying it was "just nonsense". Well it's not nonsense, it's a coping method, if I didn't do that I'd do worse and kill myself.
This was never said directly to me, but people always say "Now I'm gonna go sit in the corner and slit my wrists." It's like, wow, thanks. Now I kind of want to..
Also: "I'd never forgive myself if something bad happened to you."
And: "Promise me you won't cut." (Even though those two are said with the best intentions.)