You know when you want to write stuff and then you don't and then you just think what's the point and so you disappear and come back and hover and then bugger off again and la la la la.
Sigh
I'm lonely
Really lonely
~Phoenix~ is my Little Sister of Awesomeness and Self-Delusion :P Bitter Angel is my Mitten Animad is my Top Trump All Im Living For - Is my beautiful and special daughter who isnt called Kim but will moan if i dont add her :P
~Phoenix~ is my Little Sister of Awesomeness and Self-Delusion :P Bitter Angel is my Mitten Animad is my Top Trump All Im Living For - Is my beautiful and special daughter who isnt called Kim but will moan if i dont add her :P
Between the pain, the almost constant headaches and the depression I need a break.
*slips back into pillow fort*
She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *
I shouldn't be at work. If I had equivalent physical symptoms to how I feel I'd at least be home, if not presenting to hospital. But because it is mental health related I just force myself to power through.
...I try to outsmart him, but somehow he knows,
Wherever I am, that f***ing dog goes... - Dog, Andy Bull
No matter how bad things get, the true test is how we choose to respond to the pain we suffer, or inflict. - Amenadiel, Lucifer
Why is the path unclear,
When we know hope is near
Understand we'll go hand in hand, but we'll walk alone in fear
~~Margo is my penguin 🐧!!! ~~
I'm done. I am tired of trying, fighting, pushing through. I think I see the light at the end of the tunnel and then it's as if it all goes black again. I'm so tired. My head hurts. Giving up is seeming like a viable option. Meh.
*hugs* to all who need one!
Sometimes when I say "I'm okay," I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight, and say "I know you're not."
*hugs for Kat and Kahlia*
Forcing myself back to work. I think I pinned the trigger. Mother's Day. I don't feel like a mother. I'm also a terrible daughter. And a useless granddaughter.
Can't do anything about the trigger. So just have to ignore everything until passes.
...I try to outsmart him, but somehow he knows,
Wherever I am, that f***ing dog goes... - Dog, Andy Bull
No matter how bad things get, the true test is how we choose to respond to the pain we suffer, or inflict. - Amenadiel, Lucifer
Why is the path unclear,
When we know hope is near
Understand we'll go hand in hand, but we'll walk alone in fear
~~Margo is my penguin 🐧!!! ~~
I just want to curl up and maybe color. What's the point of having friends if they aren't there for you when you need them? And it's not even like I need them to meet me or come to my house. Just reply to my text. Give me a few minutes of your time. *sigh*
Sometimes when I say "I'm okay," I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight, and say "I know you're not."
*safe hugs Kat, Annie, anyone else who wants/needs some*
Annie: I hope things settle down quickly.
My sleep and my mood are both going down the drain right now. I'm sick of crying myself to sleep, and getting up every hour. *sigh*
She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *
Who needs sleep? Apparently not me. I'm so exhausted. Everything seems like an uphill battle these days. I just can't seem to get out of feeling so down and out. This sucks. ☹
Sometimes when I say "I'm okay," I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight, and say "I know you're not."
Who needs sleep? Apparently not me. I'm so exhausted. Everything seems like an uphill battle these days. I just can't seem to get out of feeling so down and out. This sucks. ☹
What's sleep? I feel the same way you do... tired but not able to get sleep.
*hugs* I hope you feel better
~Matt~
Susanna Kaysen: I'm ambivalent. In fact that's my new favorite word.
Dr. Sonia Wick: Do you know what that means, ambivalence?
Susanna Kaysen: I don't care.
Dr. Sonia Wick: If it's your favorite word, I would've thought you would...
Susanna Kaysen: It *means* I don't care. That's what it means.
Yesterday was exhausting. I may be adding 2 more therapies a week to my kids' schedule. Ugh. I am trying to write out everything going through my mind with everything going on right now but it just makes me feel like a shitty parent. It's perfectly ok to eat my feelings, right?
Sometimes when I say "I'm okay," I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight, and say "I know you're not."
Hope everyone is doing alright. *offers hugs to those who need it*
Is life always so hard? Do we ever see the light at the end of the tunnel? Life is just really dragging me down. It's stressing me out even in my dreams and I'm on edge 24/7. People ask me how I manage, how I do it. I don't know but I'm hanging on by a very thin thread. I have no time for me and when I make time for me, it's hours after I should be in bed. If running away was an option I would do it...like yesterday.
Sometimes when I say "I'm okay," I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight, and say "I know you're not."
Taking a holiday was probably one of the best things I did, but I forgot that when I get back, all my life issues are waiting for me. Hahaha. Oh life, you so fickle.
The last couple of weeks have been crazy with the start of the university term. Last Thursday was Orientation all day and both Tuesday and Wednesday this week were lectures/tutorials/workshops....
Can I collapse now and sleep for a few days? Between the pain situation and my having to deal with people I'm exhausted.
*safe hugs for anyone who wants/needs them*
*crawls into my pillow fort to curl up and get some sleep*
She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *
Hi everyone, hope you are all doing okies *hugs to all*
Haven't been in here for awhile... but really struggling right now with everything and not being safe
*hides in the corner* I hope things get better :(
~Matt~
Susanna Kaysen: I'm ambivalent. In fact that's my new favorite word.
Dr. Sonia Wick: Do you know what that means, ambivalence?
Susanna Kaysen: I don't care.
Dr. Sonia Wick: If it's your favorite word, I would've thought you would...
Susanna Kaysen: It *means* I don't care. That's what it means.