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Old 03-08-2020, 04:24 PM   #2461
one_step_closer
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It was my fault that the covid results from me took days, I hadn't registered a number online. They got back to me and said that the time I took the test I didn't have corona and that has stayed the same.

My CPN phoned me mistakenly so we didn't have much time to talk. She's pushing me away from her. I haven't written about when my support worker is going to phone me, I think she's trying to individually help her clients to move forward with being outside.. I've ordered 2 diaries but how is that going to remind me if I forget to write things down? I already use reminders on my phone and on 2 calendars. Now my CPN has no time to phone me until she's back on the 11th I think. I'm not complaining, I have great support. I'm just very needy and the support I get now isn't frequent enough for me. I am greedy. I feel so alone.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


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Old 03-08-2020, 09:24 PM   #2462
Juella
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I'm really happy to know you don't have corona!
Sorry about your CPN, that sucks. I don't mean to invalidate your feelings, but maybe she is just busy?
I can totally relate to the "forgetting to write things down" thing. Are phone notifications unhelpful too?

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Old 04-08-2020, 06:03 PM   #2463
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Thank you.

I'm sorry that I can't have a proper conversation I'm still feeling some side effects. I know my CPN is very busy right now and all of the CMHT and the support workers want to star getting people into a 'normal' routine that they had been doing before lockdown.

When I put notifications in my phone I end up never finish them and keep forgetting what I was supposed to write.

I don't know how to explain anything.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


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Old 07-08-2020, 11:40 AM   #2464
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Even though the CMHT is busy, you are important too and I hope that she can give you a call soon and help you to manage these side effects.

Did your diaries arrive? Maybe you could use one as a bit of a journal, e.g. "It's 10am, I'm eating some cornflakes" to help you feel more grounded and aware of time and what you're doing.



We may not see eye to eye, but we can respect each other's opinions and find the truth in them.
Perhaps in those honest conversations, instead of demonising each other,
we might see each other as imperfect humans, doing our best. ~ Jodi Picoult


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Old 07-08-2020, 02:09 PM   #2465
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Thank you. I haven't been managing to write in my diary with, my letters just seem all jumbled up now. It frustrated me so much I feel locker and I can't get my med requisition jumbled up when I'm trying to say to people one to one. I have people I really need to talk to and they just give up after telling me they don't understand. It's taken me so much time here and people don't want to give me their name. Thank you for the thoughts.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


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Old 08-08-2020, 09:08 PM   #2466
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Who do you need to talk to? Could you type out some key points, taking as long as necessary, to show them? You could post things here if you wanted, to check that they make sense.



We may not see eye to eye, but we can respect each other's opinions and find the truth in them.
Perhaps in those honest conversations, instead of demonising each other,
we might see each other as imperfect humans, doing our best. ~ Jodi Picoult


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Old 09-08-2020, 06:11 PM   #2467
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Evening I sometimes write bullet points about my day and what we might watch and chat about. Everyone just told it was discharge day. They were kind about getting me home person. I wish they could an event where I fall or a long Blok chat where they say they don't recognise what I'm saying and say I don't text and a jumping over world but there's no pressure from any of up no to anyone. I'm really sad because writing and listening to are really good for me. So I can't really be here for anyone at the moment but I do appreciate everything you have done for me,





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


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Old 10-08-2020, 03:03 PM   #2468
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Who swapped posts with me? I just wrote and it's really hard to write and make myself. I'll just see if the mods can see it.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


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Old 11-08-2020, 02:31 AM   #2469
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I hope the mods can help you figure out what happened and you are as okay as possible.



You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.


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Old 11-08-2020, 08:13 AM   #2470
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Heya, I’m sorry I wasn’t able to help out with your post, I couldn’t see anything. How are you doing?



We may not see eye to eye, but we can respect each other's opinions and find the truth in them.
Perhaps in those honest conversations, instead of demonising each other,
we might see each other as imperfect humans, doing our best. ~ Jodi Picoult


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Old 11-08-2020, 12:20 PM   #2471
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Everything I getting worth. My muddled speech is still going on and people just layer or try to be friendly realise the I'm not trying to be ok and then the get and I'm unsafe. I didn't have my search my position and we found my biscuits but today it's saying my phone is saying it's on a road close to me. I'm too afraid to ask one to help me. I shouldn't be uncomfortable as this. They have a croup thing on Fb so maybe they could help. My routine is all muddled. And that often makes me more suicidal. I don't know what to say to the people.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


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Old 11-08-2020, 01:01 PM   #2472
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Your speech/writing does seem very muddled. Do you know what's causing that? I wonder if that might be something to work through with your team because being able to communicate how you're feeling is something you've often said was important - understandably so.

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Old 12-08-2020, 02:17 PM   #2473
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They keep saying it's a are bad for my. I'm hope it's stand. My CPN phoned today but I din't get so invalid becuause they a time when they can get my build a picture or get him to video. I actually don't think I asked for this. Read and waking dreaming seems so clean to me but I;m too tired to do something about it.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


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Old 14-08-2020, 01:49 PM   #2474
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I just lost my reply. Stupid RYL and stupid me. I did copy the paste incase I rand of time but I mist have started another pest. I'm not being allowed to speak.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


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Old 14-08-2020, 04:22 PM   #2475
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I want to write here but can't. And stop.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


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Old 14-08-2020, 04:31 PM   #2476
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I wish we could help you better. We care about you and respect you and here when you feel able.

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Old 14-08-2020, 05:29 PM   #2477
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Just to echo we definitely care. Can you get in touch with a medical human about the confusion and issues with coordination? It is clearly impacting you a great deal and deserves to be taken seriously.



You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.


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Old 14-08-2020, 05:40 PM   #2478
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My CPN phones me once a week mostly and when I mention the symptoms they say I've to stick with it for now.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


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Old 14-08-2020, 05:51 PM   #2479
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Can you speak to a medical human though? A CPN isn't a medical human as far as I am aware. I meant more like a GP or such?



You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.


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Old 14-08-2020, 05:57 PM   #2480
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My psych phoned before I spoke to my CPN and she said to stick with my meds as they are.

I'm crying and suicidal. There's nothing to live for. It's just emotional pain. I want to get out of this pain. I don't know what else to say. And now the whole weekend is ahead. I don't know to get through the rest of this day.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


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