Adult - Harming daily
Had such a **** time, let's have a pity party for me, my partners mam got sick in February last year, I took her to Dr apointments, walked her dogs and did her shopping, in August she was diagnosed with anal cancer we then waited until December for her treatment to start, I took and sat with her through her chemo for a week when she suffered a massive stroke (I found her in the kitchen) she then died slowly in hospital on the 21st December, I have stayed strong ft for my partner and his family and now I just don't want to live, I can put things in boxes but I think a lot. I am now harming every couple of days, I plan it I don't do it under stress, I'm as calm as anything. My ex mother in law is dying, so I can not kill myself, I have my kids birthdays, I have a great niece I am yet to meet (corinavirus lockdown) so it seems 14 Jan is the day I will die I will try to hold out till then, but I don't know if I can. I don't want to be me.