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Old 07-07-2019, 01:42 PM   #1
Soft Kitty
 
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Anyone want to develop a routine with me?

No worries if not :)

It can be daily, weekly, monthly etc. Just choose one thing (at a time) and let us know how you get on.

I want to adjust my sleep pattern into a routine. It's been terrible a lot of my adult life but getting better now I'm in my 30s and on different meds. I just want to hone it. This will be my first daily routine.

Plan is to get into a routine where I'm in bed with lights out by 11.30pm and out of bed at 8am. (Some days this will need to be different/earlier, but mostly I'm going up see how I get on with this schedule).

So, tonight is an 11.30pm latest bedtime.
Tomorrow I'll need to be up at 7am.

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Old 07-07-2019, 07:06 PM   #2
Auror.
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I actually already do and track this with a number of routine things. :)

Right now I'm working on washing my hair twice a week and trying to start our bedtime routine by 1am. I like the idea of having some accountability and support though.

Good luck to you!!


I've already successfully started doing my weekly stabbing on the correct day, brushing my teeth twice a day, using mouthwash and flossing daily, shaving three times a week, putting on lotion daily, and using my prescription face cream daily. Washing my hair is still the main thing I struggle with with regards to hygiene aside from clothing, which is next on my list to tackle.

I'm happy to talk more about how I started doing this if anyone would find it helpful.

I've struggled for quite some time with regards to going to bed at a reasonable time, so this one is much harder to tackle for me as well. What are you trying?

For me, I have a lamp in the living room that is set on a timer. It is currently set to turn off at 12:30am. Originally I was supposed to use that as my time to start my bedtime routine and did, but I've gotten far worse about it. I'm not sure if trying to change the timer to go off at 1am would be helpful for me, or if keeping it at 12:30 should serve as a reminder that I need to head to bed soon.

My new laptop has a setting where I can set it to turn itself off at a specific time and I have not used it yet, but I am beginning to think I need to try.

I would love to hear how you get on and if anything you try is helpful. :)



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Old 07-07-2019, 07:29 PM   #3
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I think this is a great thread idea. I like to set routines at work but when it comes to home and life stuff I just cannot do it... so I'm not even sure where to start.

Brushing teeth twice a day would be a good one actually. Or I was thinking of a cleaning schedule (really struggle keeping the house clean) or something to do with eating/snacking but not sure if that's appropriate. My sleeping pattern needs addressing too!

Argh. =/ Help?

Auror - I would definitely be interesting in hearing how you got into your routines. And can you explain "weekly stabbing" too please?! Hoping it's a typo!

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Old 07-07-2019, 08:31 PM   #4
Auror.
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I actually have a cleaning and laundry schedule also lol.

Routines are really important for me personally. So I have routines for just about everything. But what works for other people might be different because I can also see having routines as being potentially overwhelming and thus caveat here that by no means am I suggesting everyone do the things that I do! Just sharing how I found things that worked for me.

Weekly stabbing isn't a typo lol. I'm on hormones and it is an injection but injection is a terrifying word and I also literally stab myself with a needle, so thus referred to as "weekly stabbing" since I do it once a week. It is important to do it on the same day every week so that your levels stay more stable and it is something that for a long time I really struggled to do on the correct day or at all regularly. But it is a prescription medication so important to do/take correctly. :P

As far as how I started with routines, this might get long so I'll put it under a hide for those who don't care.

The following content has been hidden - Reason : very long
I basically just sat down one day and wrote out a list of ALL the things I wanted to have as routines, no matter how small of things. So for me it was things like, brush my teeth, floss, change socks, change clothes, wash hair, shave, wash my sheets, sweep the floor, go grocery shopping, etc.. Once that part of the list was made, I wrote out how often I wanted to do those things. So, brush teeth twice a day, change socks once a day, wash hair twice a week, sweep floor once a week, go grocery shopping once a week, clean dog crate once a month, and so on. Then I broke the list up into 3 groups- for me my types are: bathroom/hygiene, cleaning, and errands. After I had everything in a group, then I went through the list and picked one thing from the list I wanted to try to work on - this can either be something that is high priority or can just be something you feel like you can handle working on. For me for example, it's a lot easier to incorporate stuff into my nighttime routine as I am not rushed before bed than my morning routines, where I am often really rushed. So I started with brushing my teeth at night.

For stuff like cleaning and laundry, I set up a weekly rotation and I keep a list of that. I also schedule cleaning in my planner. One week I wash the bathroom rugs and clean the bathroom, another week I clean the dog's crate, another week I wash our blankets, blah blah blah. I have free laundry in my apartment though, so I can realise that might not be so simple for everyone if it costs money or requires going elsewhere for something like that. I like cleaning so this is pretty easy for me, but I know most people don't like cleaning.

For errands I pick a day to do them each week and put the time in my planner. I also try to have a backup day in mind for if my schedule changes where I can fit it in if need be. So for example I always go grocery shopping on Wednesdays, but if my Wednesday has something else planned I try to find a time to go on Tuesdays instead. Even if I only need one thing that week, I still make sure I go because for me it's really easy to get overwhelmed and panic about going someplace again if I stop going regularly. I try to pick something nice to reward myself with after, like snuggling with my dog or stopping for a nice coffee.

Hygiene/bathroom stuff is really the hardest for me to do easily so that's been my big focus and where I've had to put the most effort in. That's why the majority of stuff I have in my routines that I've had to work on is related to that. To tackle this, I stuck one of those little whiteboards and fun color dry erase markers up on the wall in my bathroom to make a modified sticker chart. (I don't have people over often but the only comments I've gotten about this are that it looks really helpful!) I picked a whiteboard that has each day of the week written out in a little section. Then I took a pen and drew a line on each day so I have a morning and evening section. After I picked my first thing to work on - brushing my teeth at night, I wrote it out on my whiteboard under each day. (Note that since my weekly stabbing is not optional, I included that also). I decided how many days I wanted to aim for as well. So while I wrote "brush teeth" under every evening, when I first started my goal was to aim for five evenings a week. If I did it that evening, I put a little checkmark next to it with the dry erase marker. If I did it five times a week, I put a little star in a corner of the whiteboard and started over. If I didn't hit five times in a week, I lost all my stars. Once I hit 4 stars (so a month's worth) I go back to zero, I reward myself, and I also have to pick something new to add in to my routine. If something is meant to be done multiple times a day (like teeth), I pick one time to start with that sounds easier to do. I don't try to add both at once.

So I've been doing things this way for maybe 6-7 months now and I've found it really helpful. It's how I incorporated so many things that I have the feeling for neurotypical, non mentally ill folks are not difficult but are things that I've struggled with for years. I don't forget to do things because they're literally on the wall next to my bathroom mirror. I don't worry about forgetting to do them because they're written down lol. Plus I get a nice little tick mark and stars when I've done them which for me is super pleasing and super motivating lol. Especially once I have 2-3 stars, I don't want to start all over again so that motivates me to keep going. It's definitely slow progress, but slow progress is still progress. :)


But yea, so I've basically had the hardest time with washing my hair and I've not been able to consistently do that one multiple weeks in a row. So that's the one I'm really focusing on right now. :P

Plus trying to get to bed not at a ridiculous time lol.



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Old 07-07-2019, 08:51 PM   #5
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Oh lol about the stabbing. So glad it's not what I thought it was!

I was just thinking that too many routines might be too overwhelming for me... because if I don't get things done then it will just cause more stress. =/

Thanks for all that info.

Think I might start with brushing teeth twice a day. It's something I attempted the other week and only managed two days and then gave up. =/

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Old 07-07-2019, 08:54 PM   #6
Auror.
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OH NO did you think I meant stabbing like a self harm thing? Crap. NOT WHAT I MEANT.

Also, yea I can see routines being overwhelming for some people, so I understand. Do what works best for you.

Two days is still two days, that's fantastic! Maybe you can aim for two days again this week, or three days?



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Old 07-07-2019, 08:58 PM   #7
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Nooooo not a self harm thing at all, more just a "got to stab people on a weekly basis" thing! That's why I thought it was probably a typo! XD

I used to have daily injections, one of which was meant to be done at the same time every day so I dunno why my brain went straight to stabbing other people, rather than injections. Silly me.

And thanks. I will make an effort this week!

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Old 07-07-2019, 09:36 PM   #8
Soft Kitty
 
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I will come back to this when a. My brain is functioning (ish) and b. I've stopped laughing over the stabbing confusion, but I just wanted to wish you both the best of luck this week and Camden, that's amazing advice you gave!

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Old 07-07-2019, 09:42 PM   #9
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It's always good to have a laugh, lol. =P

It is amazing advice.

And Soft Kitty you deserved a big thank you for making this thread and spurring me on to keep trying. Good luck to you too! =)

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Old 09-07-2019, 09:50 AM   #10
one_step_closer
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Just wanted to say good luck to you all.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


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Old 12-07-2019, 09:30 AM   #11
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I use Daylio and it has a thing to add goals and reminders
So for me it's to read for fun daily, and walk

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Old 26-07-2019, 09:10 PM   #12
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I’d like to join in please!

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Old 27-07-2019, 11:21 AM   #13
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What sort of routine do you want to start?

I've fallen off the routine wagon quite badly. Managed a few days... This is a reminder to start again and keep trying.

How're you getting on, Soft Kitty?

Beddie, totally missed your comment. I'm glad that works for you. Personally I find phone reminders easy to ignore though!

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Old 29-07-2019, 05:35 PM   #14
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And me too :)



Have you ever confused a dream with life? Or stolen something when you have the cash? Have you ever been blue? Or thought your train moving while sitting still? Maybe I was just crazy. Maybe it was the 60's. Or maybe I was just a girl... interrupted.
I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside. I tried groups, didn't work out just made my depression a lot worse.

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