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Old 27-11-2020, 11:09 AM   #1
Join Date: Nov 2020
Help. Need Perspective

Hi all,

I'm really hoping for some much needed advice.

I'm at a crossroads. I'm 34, live alone, I quit a hellish, toxic job 4 weeks ago because I was being belittled and bullied on a daily basis. My partner of 4 years lives abroad and has just had a second visa application rejected. Just a holiday, just a chance for us to spend time together over Christmas. The government pocket the money and we have no right to appeal.

I just don't know what to do. Would I be crazy to sell my house and leave the country? I have consent to let it until August 2021 but it's such a headache for just 6 months. I like my little flat and of course the mortgage is half the price of renting.. and I'm unlikely to have a salary that would get me a property in the South East again.

My partner and I just want to start living, to start a family and start moving forwards.
I'm really open to alternative living and would be very interested in hearing from people who've lived differently to 'the norm'.

Would really love some perspective, I feel like I'm just trying not to drown.

Thank you!

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Old 27-11-2020, 10:49 PM   #2
I always have a choice
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Safety Cupboard
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Is it crazy? Yeah, probably! But that doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. Sometimes following your heart is the right thing to do and could be really worth it. You just need to be prepared for it not being the right move and have a bit of a safety net in place- maybe renting your house out for 6 months to see how it goes could be that safety net, even if it's a bit of a faf.

Inconveniently, such a big decision really has to be made solely by you and your partner, as I'm sure you know! What does your partner think? Maybe you could both make a list of the pros and cons of the move to help you weigh it up.

Good luck, whatever you choose!

We may not see eye to eye, but we can respect each other's opinions and find the truth in them.
Perhaps in those honest conversations, instead of demonising each other,
we might see each other as imperfect humans, doing our best. ~ Jodi Picoult

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