Contains sexual abuse - This is too much

TheseDays · 16-06-2014, 12:52 AM

I can't deal with the flashbackds and the nightmares. I can still feel his hands around my neck. No one understands why I don't like people touching me, or being around lots of people. They just assume I'm being anti social and need to be 'happier'. I'm such a loner, no one wants to be the crazy girls friend who just constantly pushes people away because she believes she is poison who destroys everything.

I'm sorry, I don't even know why I'm pposting. Probably had too much to drink.

Uglyducklin · 16-06-2014, 06:37 AM

Hi Kate it's ok to post please don't feel you shouldn't . I think flashbacks and nightmares are hard for people to comprehend and I'm so sorry you don't supported. Are you getting any help currently? You are not poison and certainly do not destroy everything. Sorry I'm a bit low on words but thinking of you xx

TheseDays · 16-06-2014, 10:43 PM

I'm sorry I posted last night, I don't deserve support.

Uglyducklin · 17-06-2014, 10:34 AM

Yes you should have posted. Please keep posting. You do deserve support. X

Wonderland. · 17-06-2014, 10:41 AM

You do deserve support, that is what we are here for.

It sounds like you are really struggling at the moment and I am sorry to hear that.

Have you ever learnt any grounding techniques? Those should help with the flashbacks.

As for the nightmare, it may be helpful to write down your thoughts before you go to bed, so you are offloading them a bit out of your mind.

TheseDays · 17-06-2014, 12:42 PM

Sometimes grounding techniques work, but other times they just don't..

This will probably sound silly but I'm actually scared of going to sleep now, I don't sleep very well anyway but recently I've not been getting to sleep until 4/5 am if at all, and when I do sleep I just have nightmares.

I've left CAMHS now as I turnt 18 a couple of months ago, Im not sure how long I'll have to wait to be seen by adult services.

Uglyducklin · 18-06-2014, 07:47 AM

Hi Katie sleep can be scary if you have nightmares. Could you speak to your gp and may be then can push your referral through more quickly? I love your picture. I love horses too but as a result of my ed I've only just been told I can ride again. Pm any time x

Patent Pending · 25-06-2014, 11:08 AM

Hey Kate,

It doesn't sound stupid that you struggle to sleep; a lot of people here have that issue and nightmares are some of the worst things you can experience after a traumatic event.

As Jessie suggested; could you speak to your GP to find out about the referral to adult services.

x x x