I wish, more than anything, that I wasn't such a goddamn coward.
Now I'll play your ghost as my ace, whenever I'm led astray.
But I am actually good, can't help it if we're tilted.
I'm in my right place, don't be a downer.
You hurt me last night...I just wish you realised it.
♥It's the ups and downs of living life this way. Promise me you'll never go away. Just stay with me through one more night because it's always darkest before the light and now I promise you I'll never turn away. I won't let you give us one less heart to break...♥
Why don't you understand that I sit playing games because it is the only way to keep my brain occupied enough that I can concentrate enough to function as a human being. So many thoughts circling at once you get annoyed when I make "inane comments about nothing" yet also get annoyed when I do something to limit the brain power I have for making the observations that lead to inane comments.
It annoys me that you accept my depressions as something I can not necessarily control yet when my mood is elevated you treat me like an insolent child that must try harder
When you repeated back to me about the incidents, of being in hospital this year and being assaulted but coming in the next day, and told me that everyone wants to make sure I get through this, I honestly wondered to myself - can I get through this course?
I was in hospital last year and I did fine. I don't have to give up. Oh please, don't make me give up.
If I don't graduate, I'm going to die... I can't do this...
Major Depression | Asperger's Syndrome | Anxiety NOS | Hints of OCD
Close your eyes. Don't you cry. Love's around you. In time, you'll fly. Don't you worry about the dark. I will light up the night with the love in my heart. I will burn like the sun that will keep you safe and warm. Like the smell of a rose on a summer's day, I will be there to take all your fears away. With the touch of my hand, I will turn your life to GOLD!
You don't deserve to be a father. E will have a much better life without you in it, just wait and see. How can you just ignore him and not care how much you're disrupting his life? How can you just lose interest in your own son? What is the matter with you?! you selfish, selfish man.
Let us go then you and I, when the evening is spread out against the sky, like a patient etherized upon a table
- T.S. Elliot
I really wanna believe you...please don't let me down tonight because I don't think my heart can take it right now ♡
♥It's the ups and downs of living life this way. Promise me you'll never go away. Just stay with me through one more night because it's always darkest before the light and now I promise you I'll never turn away. I won't let you give us one less heart to break...♥
I think I've finally started to admit to myself that what happened that night could be considered as the R word. Not totally. I still think it was my fault for being that drunk and for letting it get that far. I don't know. I wish that night never happened obvs but still.
I don't know. I don't really want to think abut it, to re-play what happened in my head any more times than I have done. I still can't fucking deal with that. That one thing that I have pushed so far to the depths of my mind that it will be near enough impossible to fully subtract.
I don't know, I just need to talk about it.
But no one will believe me because you implied that I did that to you.
And for that... I FUCKING HATE YOU.
The world is just illusion always trying to change me.
You will find wonder wherever you can, and spread joy whenever you are able.
I felt emotions of gentleness and pleasure, that had long appeared dead, divide within me. - Frankenstein.
U annoy me so much u think u know everything wen u don't n u try to prove me wrong wen I have evidence that I'm correct how can I get frustrated so much by my best friend