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Old 30-11-2017, 12:52 AM   #1
Join Date: Nov 2017
Need Advice

Hey Everyone,

I need someone's advice on how to handle this. So my situation:

I just graduated and landed a job with a good company and I'm pretty prepared for my school loans. My friend said me and him should get an apartment one day and maybe his gf can move in too. I have no problem with that, as we get along really well!

Here's the problem:
My friend, I'm sorry to say, isn't the most ambitious person. He started college the same time I did and still hasn't finished his associates degree. He still has to get his bachelor's if he wants to teach. Also, his gf went to school for graphic design and she is very talented but her school cost $40,000 a year!! She's doing some freelance work here and there but can't seem to find anything stable. Even though her parents are helping her I don't how that's ever gonna be paid off.

I'm mostly worried about there financial situation down the road. I would love to help them but that's just too much to handle and I'm just worried about being in the middle of it. Any thoughts are helpful!

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Old 30-11-2017, 04:28 PM   #2
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland

I think all you can really do is be honest with them about your concerns. How do you think they might react if you said you were worried about future finances without saying things like you don't think he's very ambitious?

I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.

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Old 07-12-2017, 04:55 AM   #3
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Upstate New York
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I know next to nothing about this. I would talk to someone older than me who has more knowledge about financial stuff/legal stuff etc. I'm lucky that my dad is a great resource for me in helping make financial decisions, but if I didn't have him, I have a few other people I know I would talk with to get feedback.

Also, it sounds like you're already feeling uncomfortable. What will it be like for you if you move in with them and have to tolerate not knowing whether they are financially stable?

I'd go with being honest with them about the financial concern (and like one_step said, leave out the unambitious bit), but you could also probably think up a more innocuous reason. Do you intend to get a pet at some point? Perhaps they are allergic... What will your work schedules (and thus sleep and recreation schedules) be like? if they really conflict, it might be challenging to live together. Do you all need/have cars? what is the likelyhood you can find an apartment in your area that has space for all of them. They may balk if you just start talking nitty gritty logistics

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Old 15-12-2017, 09:03 AM   #4
Join Date: Dec 2017

I think before acquiring flat all of you 3 ought to choose the money related stuff ahead of time, So that in future nobody should confront issues.

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