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Old 24-02-2016, 07:13 PM   #1
Dying_Angel
 
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Finding things hard

My head is going crazy. I'm struggling to sleep. I'm desperate to.hurt myself. And do something more. I feel like I'm gonna go mad. My head won't shut up. How can I make it shut up? There's too much noise. I need it to stop.



I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside. ~ Girl Interrupted

When you dont want to feel, death seems like a dream. ~ Girl Interrupted

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Old 24-02-2016, 09:54 PM   #2
Isoverity
 
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My technique is to not try to force the stresses and thoughts to stop - but to watch them and realise we all have a dark doubty side that wants to cause panic, fear, anxiety etc. When you can train to recognize those assaults for what they are, you can watch them come and subside. That way you get left stronger - instead of weaker and more vulnerable.

Anxiety comes from falling away from your center and getting stuck in your thinking/feeling machinery. If you indulge that anxiety and resent it, struggle with it, talk with it etc the anxiety gets worse. Thats a sure sign your being tricked into self-doubt and despair. Your "thoughts" aren't thoughts but evidence of compulsive overreacting. That happens sometimes but - like a slap on the hand - the pressure/sting will subside if you dont "pick" at it and drive yourself nuts



"Not all those who wander are lost" Tolkien

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Old 25-02-2016, 12:39 AM   #3
PassedExpectations
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I agree with Isoverity :) telling yourself to not think something is a surefire way to make the thought into your brain every five seconds. I can empathize with the feeling of needing the thoughts to stop though. They can feel so overwhelming.

Have you ever done any mindfulness practice? It doesn't tend to be super helpful the first time you try because it does take practice to get good at, but it can be really beneficial in the long run. Otherwise, perhaps you could try doing something like sitting in the shower that would give you some full body sensory information (hearing the water, seeing the drops, feeling it, smelling any soap, etc.) that might sort of drown out some of the thoughts and get you focused on something else, and thus give you some releif.

Did something happen that caused all these thoughts to ramp up? If you don't feel safe on your own, perhaps you could stay around other people for a bit.




this is my magical medicine cabinet. Left to right they contain: courage, hope, calmness, and strength.

The magical part: They NEVER run out, so borrow some any time you want.



PM me anytime, I love getting messages :)
Katie


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Old 25-02-2016, 08:56 PM   #4
Dying_Angel
 
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Thank you both.

I shall try some of the things you have suggested. I had an emergency appointment at the doctors today my medication was upped a bit. Don't think it's gonna help tho



I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside. ~ Girl Interrupted

When you dont want to feel, death seems like a dream. ~ Girl Interrupted

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Old 25-02-2016, 09:46 PM   #5
PassedExpectations
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I'm glad to hear you could get in to see the doctor, even if it didn't feel super helpful. Do you have another appointment scheduled to get ongoing support?

What can you do this evening and night to help yourself feel better?




this is my magical medicine cabinet. Left to right they contain: courage, hope, calmness, and strength.

The magical part: They NEVER run out, so borrow some any time you want.



PM me anytime, I love getting messages :)
Katie


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Old 26-02-2016, 04:31 PM   #6
[Luna]
 
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How are you feeling today? Any brighter?
x

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