RYL Forums


Forum Jump
Post New Thread  Reply
Old 28-07-2011, 10:46 PM   #1
mas35
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
What would you call this ?

My boyfriend has thoughts popping up in his head constantly about all of the things he classifies as "wrong" about me (or classifies as faults) and it is ruining our relationship.

What kind of mental illness would this be ?

Things such as:

he doesn't like my glasses frames (the style of them)
a mole I have
a few extra pounds of weight
he inspects our toilet rim for peee
leftovers in the fridge for more than 2 days gets to him
a few scars I have
and so on and so on


Last edited by Tears and Rain : 30-07-2011 at 08:01 PM. Reason: removed the numbers.x
mas35 is offline   Reply With Quote
2 Hugs Given By :
Old 29-07-2011, 01:45 AM   #2
rara avis
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Australia
I am currently:

To me it sounds like he is being a jerk and you deserve better. Are these thought he agrees with? If so he's a jerk, ditch him and find someone who loves you for who you are. All of you.

rara avis is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 29-07-2011, 02:15 AM   #3
twosugartea
a cup of tea, and me
 
twosugartea's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011

We couldn't possibly attempt to diagnose him, we're not professionals, and we don't know anything about him.

Are you sure it's a mental illness, and like rara says, not just him being a jerk? I mean, everyone has bad thoughts sometimes, but to TELL you them? That doesn't sound too nice.



And at once I knew, I was not magnificent...


twosugartea is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 29-07-2011, 04:39 AM   #4
mas35
 
Join Date: Jul 2011

I thought he might have a problem obsessing over things but you're probably right. He thinks he's holier than thou when he has a list of issues sky high. The last few weeks have been really bad with his "thoughts" popping up in his head.

I only wrote a few of the things that he picks about.

The mole.... he tied a piece of dental floss around it hoping it would cut the circulation and eventually fall off. Since doing this, the mole is now swelled, oozing and bleeding. I was to my doctor today and he's referring me to another doctor to have it removed (I did take the floss off.)

HE has a major problem... HE is HIS PROBLEM !!

He stares at my scars and says how ugly one of them is. It's making me feel sick and depressed.

I have been thinking a lot about kicking him to the curb !

You're right. I deserve better.

mas35 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 29-07-2011, 04:48 AM   #5
mas35
 
Join Date: Jul 2011

I'm having trouble posting. I'm using my cell phone to write this.

I have low self esteem as it is and the things he says and does is making it worse. I'm scared to go through with dumping his loser arse.

I wish I had more confidence in myself. I feel so sad and hurt.

mas35 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 29-07-2011, 06:36 AM   #6
saramher
 
saramher's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Los Angeles, CA, US
I am currently:

You definitely deserve better. He's emotionally and verbally abusing you. No one deserves that. You would be so much better off without all the crap he's giving you.



The Smallest Light Shines Through the Darkest Night


saramher is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 29-07-2011, 09:07 AM   #7
rara avis
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Australia
I am currently:

Like I said before mas35 you do very very much deserve better. And all guys aren't arses, you'll find someone who treats you with respect, adoration and love.
Wish you the best

rara avis is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 29-07-2011, 09:24 AM   #8
flutterby butterfly
Blu
 
flutterby butterfly's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: UK
I am currently:

Quote:
Originally Posted by saramher View Post
You definitely deserve better. He's emotionally and verbally abusing you. No one deserves that. You would be so much better off without all the crap he's giving you.
this

Quote:
Originally Posted by rara avis View Post
Like I said before mas35 you do very very much deserve better. And all guys aren't arses, you'll find someone who treats you with respect, adoration and love.
Wish you the best
...and this. *hugs*



Previously unicorn-tears

In a burst of light that blinded every angel
As if the sky had blown the heavens into stars
You felt the gravity of tempered grace,
falling into empty space
With no-one there to catch you in their arms


Kahlia1981 & silentgirl are my RYL sisters
Plumeria Sister

flutterby butterfly is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 30-07-2011, 07:54 PM   #9
insidemyhead
time traveller
 
insidemyhead's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: cloud cookoo land
I am currently:

Quote:
Originally Posted by rara avis View Post
Like I said before mas35 you do very very much deserve better. And all guys aren't arses, you'll find someone who treats you with respect, adoration and love.
Wish you the best
This, he could be obsessive but it more sounds like control and deliberate degradation. It's not healthy fir you and this could progress to something more hurtful *hugs* please take care of yourself these words aren't meant to hurt just exprssing an outsiders opinion xx




“There is no sun without shadow, and it is essential to know the night.”


insidemyhead is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 31-07-2011, 08:48 AM   #10
not_so_insig
It's Bouquet! B-U-C-K-E-T!
 
not_so_insig's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Wales, UK
I am currently:

Quote:
Originally Posted by insidemyhead View Post
This, he could be obsessive but it more sounds like control and deliberate degradation. It's not healthy fir you and this could progress to something more hurtful *hugs* please take care of yourself these words aren't meant to hurt just exprssing an outsiders opinion xx
I totally agree. I have read stories in women's magazines where the man start "controlling" the woman in little ways, such as way you dress. It gradually gets worse, the woman has no friends or family (because he has cut them off from her), and he starts beating her. She becomes an domestic abuse victim, and ends up either dead or in jail from trying to protect herself against him (as she is seen as the criminal, not him).

I dont want that to happen to you, so I would suggest you leave him if you are already living with him. If you arent, please dump him. The chances are that he will say he will change: men who are controlling/abusive never do. So please dont fall for that!



Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson
"I hear those voices that will not be drowned"
Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013


not_so_insig is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 01-08-2011, 02:34 AM   #11
worthless x
All These Things I Hate Revolve Around Me
 
worthless x's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
I am currently:

He sweetie, he sounds like a mean boyfriend :( boyfriend shouldn't be like this.. think this or say this.

He's just being manipulative and nasty! He's controlling you and wants to control everything about you. He's just making you feel bad.

This could be due to him not feeling in control of his own life or something thats happened to him growing up - having strict parents or having no parents.

When he does the inspection and freaks out over left overs - that sounds like OCD.

Take care x



If Tears Could Build A Stairway
I Would Walk Right Up To Heaven
&; Bring You Home x
February 16th 2012.


worthless x is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-08-2011, 01:47 AM   #12
nowhereman
 
nowhereman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
I am currently:

Tbh I don't think it's a mental illness, I think it's his personality and he has no right to judge on such stupid little things. Tell him to feck off and shut up!

nowhereman is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Members Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Censor is ON
Forum Jump


Sea Pink Aroma
All times are GMT +1. The time now is 03:49 AM.